How long would you date LD before moving to them?

[Chitowngirl]

Just curious... what's the average time with LDR and when you decide you've had enough and one of you makes the move to the other's city?

[Rollercoasterr]

Everyone has their own timelines. Sometimes there are circumstances that prevent you from just dropping everything to move. There's children, a job, a house, family ties, etc. to think about before you go rushing into anything.

 

No one really wants to be in an LDR. We didn't all just wake up one day and decide to do this. We all fell in love with a person who lived far away and decided that person was too important to let go. Moving closer to be together is the main goal, but when things are out of your control it doesn't work out that way.

 

Mathew and I will be coming up on 2 years before our distance will close. We got engaged last Feburary and jumped straight in on the visa process and we're almost finished with that. If he lived in the same country as me I don't know when we would have moved to be together. I would like to think once we got engaged, but we will never know.

[Eeyore79]

I would have to date someone for at least a year before I'd consider moving, and explore all aspects of our relationship... sex, friendship, meeting family, spending holidays together... I'd have to be really sure he was the one for me before I'd consider one of us moving. I know from experience that I often think I like someone but I lose interest within six months, or their family is a pain, or their day-to-day lifestyle (which you're not exposed to in an LDR) isn't compatible.

 

LDRs require more time than other relationships when deciding if it works, because you spend less time together and get together less frequently; you tend to have big visits rather than just popping round for an hour to see the other person, which means it's difficult to get to know the real day-to-day stuff about them.

[aerogurl87]

Well for me I'd move (or have my SO) move within one to two years if possible.

[sugarmomma]

2 years maximum.

[Finissima]

I think it's hard to say - if you have a legitimate opportunity come up in the other person's city (school, job, etc.) it might be quite soon. But I know I would not do long distance for more than a year, or maybe a year and a half. At that point, I know I would either break up with the person, or move myself.

 

I mean...if you have been together, NOT in an LDR, at some point, then obviously you are both trying your best to be back together as soon as possible. In my relationship, we've been apart almost a year (although some of that we broke up for) and I am nearing the point where I can't do it anymore. But, he will be moving here soon...so I'm happy!