5 Weeks NC

[confused_pjl]

So, I've been posting on here each week I have success with NC. Today is 5 weeks. I notice myself getting stronger each day, although I still have down periods where I think about her and get depressed, sad and/or angry. I still have no desire to talk to her or view her FB profile.

 

I have not heard about her, how she is doing, how things are going with her and this new guy and I haven't seen either of them around. Which are all FANTASTIC things. I do suffer a bit of anxiety when I go out thinking that I may run into one of them or both of them together, that feeling does suck. I'm starting to stop drinking as much as well. Seems like every time I get drunk I get depressed and sad and am stuck that way for 2 -3 days. My advice, don't drink until you feel certain that you won't think about your ex and get sad.

 

I do know that she is getting herself into a bad slump because she is starting to get mail from creditors here. I've just been putting "Return to Sender - No Longer at this Address". Not my problem anymore. I still have love for her and I still miss her. I'm trying to focus all my energy on myself and better myself. It is very hard. The evenings and nights are the most painful. I'm still having dreams about her/them which really sucks because I wake up and then have a hard time falling back asleep. The hardest part for me is when I imagine them doing sexual things or doing things together that we used to do together.

 

My hope is that I can eventually look back at all my posts, laugh and be thankful that I am in a better place without her, as hard as it is right now.

 

All of your comments, suggestions and support has been so helpful for me. LS has definitely been one of my rocks, keeping me from contacting her and helping me move forward. I really appreciate all the encouragement. Thank you everyone who has been helping me get through this. I hope that eventually I can help some people on LS get through the same thing I am going through.

[Meaplus3]

Well you keep up the good work. 5 weeks is awesome progress. See.. your doing it. Stay strong.

 

Mea:)

[Rearden Metal]

Keep it up pjl. 5 weeks is a nice chunk of time. I bet the next 5 will be even better.

[DustySaltus]

I'm glad you're making progress. You have a lot of support here. Stay strong.

[McGrupp]

good job!!!!!

[tylerdurden]

Keep up the good work mate , 5 weeks its impressive, but I guess if she has a boyfriend it would be pointless to break NC.

[USMCHokie]

This is great news. Keep it up! Remember that we're all here and we've all been through this, just like you're going through it. Soon you'll be counting the months of NC, and then eventually you won't even be counting because it doesn't matter to you anymore.

[confused_pjl]

Thanks everyone. I'm trying very hard to be strong. It seems like every time I have a really good day I end up dreaming about her that night and feel crappy in the morning. I had a great day yesterday, then I had a dream about her last night. On a quick side note, every time I do dream about her they are dreams about her hurting me emotionally, not dreams about us being together or being happy together. Anyways, my dream last night was that she took my car and went to her mothers for a few hours. She didn't end up coming back home at all. In my dream I woke up the next morning and saw my car in the driveway, I heard the shower running and ran into the bathroom to find her standing there with one of my shirts on waiting for the water to warm up. I asked her where she was and she started crying saying she slept at her mothers and wasn't sure if she wanted to be in this relationship anymore, then I woke up for real.

 

I hate this, these dreams make me feel so crappy in the morning. Any advice on what I can do to push through these kind of mornings and/or anything I could do before going to bed to keep my mind off her all night?