, Dating and Worries

[LostInTurn]

I've been dating my significant other for 6 months now. We have a strong bond and a solid relationship. Last month I asked if we could move in together (he's relocating so we can be closer together) This question caught him completely off guard (he's never lived with a significant other before) He needed some time to think about it, so I gave it to him. A few weeks later, he said he wanted to move in. Of course, there are natural apprehensions when it comes to a step like this; which I understand and appreciate.

 

Lately, I haven't been doing some small things... like sending him texts in the morning and having hour long phone calls. I didn't think anything of it though. There is a fear in me. I'm afraid of losing him, so maybe in some odd way, stopping these habits was a way for me to protect myself. Well, either way... he recently told me he sees only positive things about living with me, but isn't ready; although he's still considering it for when he relocates.

 

A friend of mine who I talk with about this... he told me he's probably confused because he thinks I've been acting differently. My significant other said the same thing. I was told worrying about this isn't worth it because it's such a small thing and I'm putting too much energy into thinking something bad is going to happen.

 

I feel as though my significant other hates me and doesn't want to be with me anymore. I guess I feel like my ego was slammed when he told me he wasn't ready after saying he was. He says he sees his future with me in it and that he wants to be with me and nothing has changed. He loves me.

 

I didn't sleep last night. I laid in bed and wished someone would wake me up from the bad dream I was actually living. I woke-up this morning feeling just as sick as when I went to sleep last night.

 

So, needless today... I went back to how I was. Sending messages, calling to say 'Hi'. I guess I wish he would have said something like 'Thanks for calling, this is exactly what I wanted'... but he didn't. I shouldn't realistically expect that because that won't happen. I think he just needs to see I'm always happy with him. That's my assessment.

 

Thoughts? Something?

[Tnerforireyeh]

Buck up, little trooper.