rl Posted July 3, 2000 Share Posted July 3, 2000 about a year ago i met a man while he and i were in a relationship it was only a couple of months ago that we met again and we started an affair. he and i got really close and spent alot of time together. he then told me that he had got engaged i was heart broken the thing is the night he broke up with me he said he had strong feeling's for me. i really love him but i am scared to talk to him as i said some things i souldn't have Link to post Share on other sites
Randy Posted July 3, 2000 Share Posted July 3, 2000 When you get involved with someone who is married, in a relationship, engaged, or whatever and the facts are fully disclosed up front as was the case with you, you get involved fully knowing the potential for heartbreak.\ So celebrate the time you spent together, the happiness you got from this adventure, and move on. I am sure he had strong feelings for you or he would not have gambled his other relationship to be with you. But he was able to express those feelings and it is obvious he has deep feelings for someone else as well, which happens all the time. If you learned something from this, it was all worth while. If you didn't, it will happen again and again until you get it right. Most people who get involved with others who are attached do so because they are scared of committment and hense such a relationship is very safe because the outcome is known in advance. Same goes for people who are attached and become involved in affairs with others who are attached. Their is little risk of hurt because you are aware of the circumstances from the outset. You need to look into your heart to see why you willingly chose to be with an attached man. You didn't make it clear if you were still with someone yourself at the time. You'll have to examine your heart and sort out the facts for yourself. The fact that you so willingly had this affair and that you were hurt by its termination speaks loudly about the state of your current relationship, if it is still ongoing. For now, move on and forget he exists. There is simply no future with him, except for additional heartache and aggravation if that's what you want. Link to post Share on other sites
billy the kid Posted July 3, 2000 Share Posted July 3, 2000 geezzze, I really wish i could meet some of u who want to have relationships with men that are married... I'm not.. but what draw's ya'll to them...I mean the married ones?? I'm not sure but most marriages ask till death ect. ect. so if he said this once do you feel he will be honest with you too???? about a year ago i met a man while he and i were in a relationship it was only a couple of months ago that we met again and we started an affair. he and i got really close and spent alot of time together. he then told me that he had got engaged i was heart broken the thing is the night he broke up with me he said he had strong feeling's for me. i really love him but i am scared to talk to him as i said some things i souldn't have Link to post Share on other sites
billy the kid Posted July 3, 2000 Share Posted July 3, 2000 great post Tony, only a little long..glad to have you back.... When you get involved with someone who is married, in a relationship, engaged, or whatever and the facts are fully disclosed up front as was the case with you, you get involved fully knowing the potential for heartbreak.\ So celebrate the time you spent together, the happiness you got from this adventure, and move on. I am sure he had strong feelings for you or he would not have gambled his other relationship to be with you. But he was able to express those feelings and it is obvious he has deep feelings for someone else as well, which happens all the time. If you learned something from this, it was all worth while. If you didn't, it will happen again and again until you get it right. Most people who get involved with others who are attached do so because they are scared of committment and hense such a relationship is very safe because the outcome is known in advance. Same goes for people who are attached and become involved in affairs with others who are attached. Their is little risk of hurt because you are aware of the circumstances from the outset. You need to look into your heart to see why you willingly chose to be with an attached man. You didn't make it clear if you were still with someone yourself at the time. You'll have to examine your heart and sort out the facts for yourself. The fact that you so willingly had this affair and that you were hurt by its termination speaks loudly about the state of your current relationship, if it is still ongoing. For now, move on and forget he exists. There is simply no future with him, except for additional heartache and aggravation if that's what you want. Link to post Share on other sites
Taressa Posted July 3, 2000 Share Posted July 3, 2000 The word "affair" just doesn't fit with "happily ever after". The word "affair" goes with words like "heartbreak", "cheat", "divorce", "wrong", and "goodbye". I'm sorry you got hurt. It was a bad situation to have gotten into. There is no feeling, no loving emotion in the world that has the ability to make wrong things right. Don't listen to his words now. His strong feelings are mentioned only as a way to keep you on the outskirts should he ever have need for an affair. There is better ahead for you. Go smartly through the heartbreak now and don't compromise yourself under the premise of apologizing for any words you might have said. Tomorrow will feel a little better and the next day a little better yet. Link to post Share on other sites
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