Jump to content

Lines you've been fed and devoured... (or spit up when he/she wasn't looking)


Just a stone's throw

Recommended Posts

OOD and JT - Thank for making me laugh today!!:laugh::laugh::laugh:

 

Nearly all of them are funny but also sad because they are so typical.

Link to post
Share on other sites
LucreziaBorgia

I dusted off some of my old lines:

 

1. We live like roommates

2. I can't remember the last time we had sex

3. We don't share a bed

4. We have an 'understanding'

5. I love him like a brother, not like I love you

6. He doesn't love me anymore

7. He treats me badly

8. He will do something drastic if I leave

9. The sex at home is not that great

10. I feel like you know me in ways no one else ever could (the old 'soulmate' line)

11. You make me feel alive for the first time in a long time

12. I can truly be myself when I'm with you

 

... and so on, and so on.

 

We (meaning the cheating party) would say whatever it takes (in varying degrees of lying) to keep the other person feeing that it was ok to be with someone who was with someone else. There wouldn't be any point in telling the truth, unless you were with someone who was genuinely interested in NSA sex.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I got these, but in fairness, most of them were true, or at least he genuinely believed them to be true:

- "If only I'd met you 10 years ago"

- "We haven't had sex in 2 years. She keeps trying and I keep telling her I'm not interested and she gets so mad at me."

- "If it was only between you and her, it would be an easy choice" (the kids, of course)

- "I don't want my kids to grow up in a broken home"

- "I don't want to be the bad guy"

- "I believe in marriage and when I got married it was for good. I never ever thought I would cheat, even though I was very unhappy."

- "She's too dependent on me for me to leave her, she can't survive without me because she's like a little kid"

- "I can't believe how lucky I am"

- "I could never abandon you!" (unless of course my xW pulls a stunt and I tell her I'm going back to her. Or if she finds out we're enagged, or any other time I'm embarrassed enough by my own conduct to deny you exist or are in any way significant.)

- "I am so torn"

- "I wish I could just swap you for her in all our lives"

- "Everytime I think I'm ready to go, I just can't do it. I need more time."

- "I agreed to leave her, but I AM NOT going to file for divorce. It would hurt her too much and I don't want to be the bad guy."

- "Yes I took her on vacation with me many motnhs after we seperated and divorce was initiated (by her), but it was only for the kids, and because I was too lazy to pack for them myself." (WTF!!!)

- "I have to go back to her, I miss my kids too much and she's not taking care of them." (Yet, the idea of filing for custody is insanity for some reason).

- "I will never ever sleep over at her house again, I promise" (except for that half dozen times that I know about.

- "Of course that was an oversight, I wouldn't purposely hold up the divorce."

- "You don't know how hard this is for me. Your divorce was different. You have no idea what I have to deal with."

- "I will probably always feel guilt and pity for xW"

 

 

 

I think that's about enough to make me naseuous.

Edited by Brokenlady
Link to post
Share on other sites

"I get along so much better with my wife now that I have you"

 

I heard lots of them, but this one always made me simultaneously crack up and wonder if the wife ever felt relieved he wasnt bugging her as much.

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...