Going to get married...Is love enough to overcome differences in relgious beliefs?

[SoulSearcher]

I have noticed that I am not alone in this....other people have posted. My situation is a bit different. I am 20, my fiance is 25. We have only been together 8 months. We have very different religious views...which until now I have been fine with. Now though, I am very scared that our marriage will be very difficult and will end up failing.

 

He tells me that if we both want it to work, it will. That it doesn't matter that we have different faiths.

 

I do love him...but is love enough to survive a lifetime??

[Thinkalot]

Different faiths may pose a challenge but it need not be something which cannot be overcome. It cannot be ignored either. You need to discuss, in practical terms, how you will deal with your differences, and how will you deal with them if you have kids? How will you bring the kids up? How will you deal with traditions and annual celebrations? Talk things through, in detail. Love can go a long way, but you also need to communicate and compromise if things are to work. Good luck to you.

[wiseOLDman]

This is very, very difficult territory and requires a great deal of discussion and, likely, concession on both your parts. The two of you can get over your religious differences so long as there is no hidden agenda, by one or both, to attempt to convert the other. If you respect each others faith for what it is then you should be ok. I've known many interfaith couples who celebrate the traditions of both faiths.

 

However, as Thinkalot points out, the picture becomes much more murky with the introduction of children. You and your fiance must have a clear, irrevokable agreement on which faith the child will be brought up under. This is not to say that they would not be educated in both, but if you are both strong in your faith, then presumably you'll want to select one for the child. Further, agree that when said child is old enough to make an informed decision, you'll honor his/her wishes to practice whichever or whatever religion with which they are most comfortable.

 

My parents were not of the same faith, but we were brought up in my mother's church and my father participated as well. He "converted" to Catholisism 20-years ago and I am honored to be his Godfather.

[SportyChick7]

I would say this is a hard decision, because you love him. But, I will say this, one religion will "WIN" over the other because both of u will raise kids and want them to be what you believe, b/c u believe it is correct. I would have to ask if it would be healthy to raise a child in situation where for example they have to choose between being "jewish" or "Musilm" im just giving examples, but could u see how this could get confusing and end up in a "Im not gonna be anything" decision.

 

I dont know, its a hard one, but I believe that different religions even in just a marriage could cause probs like different views on issues that are controversal. I would have to say this should be a no, but hey its your decision.

[RobertoPNW]

You need to consult with each pastor/priest/leader about this. Get some premarital counseling, very important.