Cherry popping: Would a guy lie about being a virgin?

[Skump]

Look, fundamentally, what women really care about are power, success and confidence. Virginity is (often) considered as a red flag in a man because it's taken as a proxy measure for low desirability. That's largely it.

 

If you project success, you're going to be fine.

 

Men psyche themselves out when it comes to sexual experience because they think women are playing the same game they are. Most women don't give two sh*ts about your f*ck score. Women are interested in positive male attributes - the sorts of qualities that make a guy tough, successful, and therefore desirable.

 

Choosing to be, er, really, really choosy, about whom you sleep with doesn't make you a loser doomed in love. Sitting around acting like a pussy and worrying about what women might think about your choice to be choosy makes you a loser doomed in love. There's an element of irony in this to be sure, but take it to heart: what women don't want is a man who gives a sh*t about what women think about his sexual history.

 

Unask the question, young monk.

[khria]

OP, what do you mean by he's ' very public and pretty vocal about being a mature virgin.'? Is this part of public speaking campaign or?

 

Is he a complete virgin or a coital virgin, meaning, in the former, no sexual contact whatsoever, and, latter, no intercourse?

 

When you say 'escalate the physical side of things', what do you mean?

 

What do *you* want?

 

Carhill,

 

1) 'very public' meaning friends and relatives know and he is very willing to talk about his reasons with me and others--no attempt to hide it, and no shame, apparently.

 

2) I'm pretty sure he meant the former.

 

3) And by 'escalate,' I meant he a) has been initiating most of the physical things (respectfully), and b) seemed pretty curious about how far I'm willing to go in the near future. I agree, tho: a month into it seems to be the right time to ask a girl...I realize lots of guys won't wait that long.

 

To the other virgin posters / late bloomers:

 

Take my word as a hot-blooded female in her 20s on the dating scene: I find this guy very attractive, and the (possible) virginity is part of the appeal and definitely does not take away from the attraction. He is sweet, a little shy, intelligent, and considerate, and I think he's awesome and we have some key things in common. Pick up artists who've been with dozens of girls don't really have much apppeal for me...can't say I'm the kind of girl that would go for a guy like that, despite his 'amazing skillset.'

 

So yes, girls can find this attractive when other commonalities are in place. Bonus if a guy seems to have more or less accepted this about himself and isn't in a rush to nab a de-virginizer, or desperate to nail the first remotely interested girl who comes along...

Edited April 3, 2010 by khria

[carhill]

OK, carry on. I personally don't see any issues here. Check back with us in a month.

 

Communicate this to him:

 

my word as a hot-blooded female in her 20s on the dating scene: I find this guy very attractive

 

Good luck

[Mandeep]

I didn't read the rest of the posts, so forgive me if I'm repeating anything.

 

I DEFINETELY can relate to this story. I was that guy. I too held on to it till 28, for the exact same reason. Not one single person believe me that I was a V... When I did finally give it up to one girl... I regretted my pickiness , should have started earlier, but ya...

 

Its very possible, and very real, believe me on this one. This is especially mroe the case today with the media and how our society is built. The media shows us all these perfect people and tells us how we can achieve and succeed, and that makes more and more guys picky.

 

My 2 best friends were the same way. Really succesful, charming, charismatic good looking guys, that no one believed were V, but they were too, just for the same reason as me... Pickiness.

 

So no, I don't think he's lying.

[clemmietc]

Any updates? I found this situation very interesting because I am pretty much in the same exact one. It's been a few weeks now. Anyway, I'll be checking for an update!

[BeautifulMan]

I lied a couple of times, girls get turned on for some reason. It's mainly the ones who like to be dominant so I let their minds believe it.