friends, more? I'm so ....

[alwaysthinking]

So similar to other posts, but I feel the need to get it out anyways!! I have worked with this man for about 6 years- we have always worked well together and gotten along quite well. He probably about 5 to 10 years older than I am, and is quite a unique individual. He is known for being moody- extremely moody "worse than a woman with PMS" is a comment that is made about him from time to time!! He also tends to be extremely private, and is quite shy.

 

Over the years, we have developed quite a close friendship- that being said, our relationship is always very dependent on what kind of mood he is in. The past 2 years, I think our friendship has drifted into the "more than friends" area. We have made contact outside of work (phone calls, occasional emails, occasional meeting after work), and shared hugs, etc. He tends to be quite "touchy" with me- on 2 separate occasions has tenderly kissed me on the cheek, and on the neck. Doesn't say anything about it- in fact, seems to make himself scarce for awhile after the physical interaction. It will get to the point where I think he is disinterested, and then suddenly, he will pop up and start flirting and interacting again.

 

I just don't know what to make of his behavior. My initial thought is that he is extremely shy and inexperienced, and is scared of where things are going. He is not your typical "player"- he can be flirty, but his behavior with me is very different than his behavior with other women at work. He has made comments that reveal that he thinks about me, watches me, and is comfortable with me. And I would be 100% certain that the physical aspect of our relationship has not occurred with anyone else. There are cultural differences- he is a very "westernized" middle eastern man- but even so, I don't think that he would be touchy/kissing, etc with a woman if there weren't feelings there.

 

I am just so confused about his hot and cold behavior- when he's cold, he's cold, but when he's hot, you can see the care and passion. I would like to confront him, but he is doing his best to avoid spending time alone with me. But yet, he returns my phone calls, leaves me messages, and is touchy feely at work. I'm scared that if I did get the chance to talk to him that I would scare him off as he is very skittish.

 

I hope I have explained this well enough. Does anyone have any insight or advice?

[Madilyn09]

It sounds like he is playing hard to get a little, and if you aren't into playing games, then I would just forget about it, because your whole relationship will be about games.

 

And if you don't think that he's playing hard to get, then just confront him. If you don't confront him, you will drive yourself crazy trying to figure out. The worst that could happen is that it doesn't work out...plenty of fish in the sea my dear =]