outgoing girl have an interest in me?

[JoeGuest]

So here's my dilemma. I am a 23 year old male student. I have become friends with another student. We talk online often and we have classes together. She is very outgoing and innocent, and I am more shy. She has become a really good friend of mine. She always tried to involve me in social gatherings with other people and stuff like that. We help eachother out in our classes too.

 

I guess I started to really become interested one night after I attended a party and got very drunk. When I got home I called her (I guess just to say "hi" LOL) and she said she was worried about me and ended up staying the night on my couch. The next morning we just watched TV for a few hours and talked...which was something I had been waiting to happen for several weeks! It was at this point I figured that she may have an interest in me...but then I thought to myself, "would she have done the same for someone else?" She always says "hey dork" online and stuff which may be a sign of affection (we always tease eachother and say how dorky each of us are)

 

One of the problems I have is that other than her spending the night, I have never spent time with her alone. Whenever we do things, it's always in a larger group. One of the problems with this is that there is another student who is always flirting with her, and she flirts back. He doesn't seem to be her type, and I don't know if they just like to play around and joke, or if there is potential for them to date. I think she may know I like her, because when she flirts with this other guy, I kind of remove myself from the situation and try to ignore it. OK, so basically I want to ask this girl to go to the mall with me this weekend, just to hang out, in an effort to get to know her on a personal level. I want to keep it low key and not make it a date. I remember a while ago we both went out to the mall...the next day we found out that we were both at the mall, and she said, "We should go together next time."

 

I often wonder..if this girl really liked me, wouldn't she have made an attempt to spend time alone with me because she has an outgoing personality? But then again, I know that she is the type that tends to worry a lot and maybe she could be just as dumbfounded as I am about the situation. I am getting frustrated, feeling like there is a tug-of-war in my head because I am analyzing every thing she says and does around me in an effort to determine if she likes me or not. I need advice on what to do!

 

Thanks!

[Reckless]

wouldn't she have made an attempt to spend time alone with me because she has an outgoing personality?

 

Not necessarily - just because she's outgoing doesn't mean she wants to have to make the first move with every guy she likes. Fact of the matter is, there are a lot of girls that like a guy to ask them out first.

 

I am analyzing every thing she says and does around me in an effort to determine if she likes me or not.

 

Only one way round this one really - ask her out. Just say it, from what you said it does sound like she might like you but in the mating game there's just no guarantees (and you might as well learn now girls are difficult to read and it doesn't get easier with time...) you'll have to be brave and take a chance. The mall sounds like a good idea, just say you would like to spend some time with her, just the two of you and see what she says. I know it's scary but sounds like you guys are friends so she won't laugh in your face...

[dyermaker]

It doesn't sound like there's much there to risk. I think you should ask her out, if she says no, at least her intentions are clear.

[monkey00]

IMO i think she's put you into the friend's category.

usually a girl will call you out to hang out with her friends IF they find out you're the shy type.

U KJNOW WHY? cause it makes her feel good about herself that she's able to help someone out, like introduce him to new ppl. help him make new friends, help him become more sociable.

 

PLUS if all the time she's called you out to chill with her friends and you agreed every time. well...sounds to me like you're already in the friends category. it goes to show that you have nothing else better to do, dont have your own life, and that you're needy. u know also how it makes her feel good about calling you out? think as if you were in her shoes, "hmm...my shy guy friend probably has nothing to do tonight, i feel like asking him to hang out...and if he has a good time chilling, i'll feel good about myself cause i did something good" if you consider her a good friend hell there's no problem with chilling with her everytime, but if you "like" her, then all those times u agreed to chill with her&Friends has become your loss.

 

just my opinion on what you said.