Anybody really fighting with the stbx through attorney's?

[Gunny376]

Just to add?

 

I feel calmer, less stressed, less anxious, less depressed and more like my old care-free, go-lucky self than I have in over twenty - thrity years.

 

I'm a good 90% back to being "me"

[nobmagnet]

Great news Gunny,

 

My "happy pills" gave me the opposite :eek: 5p 50p 5p 50p if you get what I mean :laugh:

 

I get "metal mouth" every now and again but they are good. Like you say feeling normal for the first time in a long time.

 

Nobby xx

[onedayatatyme]

Today I'm not the jittery nervous mess that I was yesterday.

 

My attorney's office called to let me know that my sneaky witness has been served his subpoena. On the off chance that my stbx is checking these posts, I'll refrain from giving any more details. But let me say that she will not be happy to see this guy in the courtroom.

 

My attorney got a fax from stbx's attorney this afternoon asking to reschedule the hearing. I don't know if that's a game in reaction to the witness being served or what? I'm inclined to decline the request unless we have no choice. Her attorney claims she has a conflict in a different court at the same time (and you are just bringing this up today?).

 

I wouldn't put it past my stbx, who has a serious problem with the truth, to leave out critical details to her attorney. They may be scrambling to figure out how to deal with this witness.

[carhill]

Assuming you're not rich, just remember all this maneuvering costs hundreds of dollars per hour. Even if you are rich, you didn't get that way by wasting money. Keep a level head and watch those billable hours. In the time from my first post here, my lawyer and I fleshed out a legal strategy, did the mechanics and I signed everything today. I love it when a plan comes together efficiently

[onedayatatyme]

Having somebody whatch his apartment was only $25 an hour agreed to in advance. I would have gladly paid for 24 hours of that but I think it took less than 4. Best $100 I ever spent.

 

I just went through the exersize of transcribing relevant texts between me and my stbx. That was a little depressing. I did all of 2009 and you can really see the rapid descent of the relationship. Everything looks great until around the first of September. Then it's clear that she's out late alot of nights starting around the end of October. Amazing how a 7 year marriage can go to **** so quickly. We sounded so happy for the first half of the year.

[onedayatatyme]

Three hours till the hearing for temporary custody, living arrangements and financial arrangments. I am confident but nervous as hell. My case could not be any better unless I had a vagina. Sorry for being crude.

 

I found out who one of stbx's witnesses is and even that is good for me. It's one of stbx's best friends. She's married to stbx's cousin so she's a family witness, that knocks her credibility down. Also, she is the one (unbeknownst to stbx) that called me and told me that stbx's car was at OM's appartment twice in March.

 

I think stbx thought I was making up a story about a secret informant. I bet she thought I was full of crap and still tracking her car by GPS.

 

So surprise, surprise, your star witness is going to admit on the stand to spying on and not trusting her best friend. And going to turn into my witness when she confirms that your car was parked at OM's apartment while I was at home with the kids thinking we were working things out in MC. :lmao:

[mikeymad]

thinkin of you dude. If you feel you can report how it goes, we're here for you.

[onedayatatyme]

Nothing big to update. The hearing was reschedule for next Thursday. My attorney had a morning case that rolled over into the afternoon, bumping our hearing. Suck. I have to spend another 8 nights in the house with the stbx.

[onedayatatyme]

Got a notice that stbx is going to have me give a deposition. Strange request though. They don't want a court reporter there but they want video. My attorney says that is almost unheard of. Anybody have any thoughts on this? We're going to depose stbx too and have a court reporter there for that.

 

I'm still obsessing and all my close friends who are in the know tell me that anybody in my shoes would have their feet up on the desk and relax. but I can't help feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders.

[onedayatatyme]

Today's the day. The hearing that was rescheduled from last Wednesday is over. One of us will be ordered to move out of the house and be given temporary custody of the children. I am nervous but not as nervous as I was last week.

 

Last week was really tough because I saw OM for the first time at the courthouse. It was much harder than I had expected. Today I'm going to try not to repeat the mistake of making eye contact. I am going to try to pretend he isn't there. While he's on the stand, I may ask my attorney if it's OK if I leave the courtroom.

 

I had such a bad reaction to it that I had to take the next day off of work last week. I was shaken pretty bad. I really wasn't expecting it because I am so ready for this divorce.

 

Anyhoo, wish me luck...

[carhill]

IMO, see your reaction as a positive sign of your ego and the feelings associated with pissing away a significant part of your life on someone who so easily tossed you aside. It's normal to feel that way. It means you cared. You will care again.

 

Good luck

[onedayatatyme]

Last Friday I typed a very long update that got eaten by my computer. It frustraded me enough that I'm just now getting back on to try again.

 

The hearing went all my way. The judge ordered her out of the house. Her last night was Friday night. I have temporary custody of the kids. I'm only ordered to pay her $1000 a month until the divorce is final. She has temporary sole use of our Tahoe and I have to continue to pay for her car insurance. Not a big deal. I got off way better than I thought I would.

 

The stress I was feeling in the weeks leading up to the hearing is all wiped away. Stbx's cockiness in the weeks leading up to the hearing is all wiped away not too. She is furious and not talking at all which suits me just fine. I think she really went into court thinking that she could not lose. The result of that was that I was WAY more prepared than she was. We introduced evidence out the wazoo to prove the affair, establish her as a habitual liar, and support the fact that I am a very involved father. Her character was completely destroyed in front of the judge, her witnesses were humiliated. By the last 20 minutes of the hearing she was in tears because it was clear which way it was going to go. It was simply no contest.

 

Her attorney is not very good, IMO, but did the best he could with what he had. He tried to get me on a bunch of petty stuff: going through her car, carrying a gun in my car, being controlling with money, being emotionally abusive. He would throw these curve balls and either I or my witnesses would knock them out of the park.

 

So now it's just up to me to keep my nose clean so that temporary custody turns into the permanent arrangement.

[carhill]

Glad things worked out in the first round.

 

As I noted far upthread, an order is just that, an order. Execution is another matter. Strap in.