BAM3289 Posted April 14, 2010 Share Posted April 14, 2010 Alright so I am engaged to a wonderful guy. I love him. We've been together 2 years. However there's this other guy. This other guy i know will always have a piece of my heart. Let me start at the beginning he was my fiance's best friend. Well me n my current fiance broke up for some time and in that time the other guy was my best friend and we even had sex. I care deeply for him. I know i would never choose him over my fiance but i have an addiction to this other guy I've tried to push him out of my head and heart but its not possible. Another thing is this other guy dissapears without seeing or talking to me for months but he always ends up coming back. Why does he do this? He recently confessed to me all his feelings for me. We hung out for a few weeks then he disapeared. I hate when he's not in my life. I miss him so much when he's gone. He's damn near immpossible i dont know how to talk to him and dont know how to deal with him. All i know is I always want more of him. I dont even know if he still has feelings for me. If he doesnt I'd feel very broken cause my feelings for him. Sometimes it seems he loves me but other times its like he hates me. What do I think? What do I do? Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted April 14, 2010 Share Posted April 14, 2010 You break off your engagement IMMEDIATELY. How can you consider marrying someone when you can't commit 100%? It is unfair to your fiancé. And you are obviously not ready to commit to a life-long relationship with someone when you have feelings for another person. Link to post Share on other sites
SouthernSunshine Posted April 15, 2010 Share Posted April 15, 2010 You break off your engagement IMMEDIATELY. How can you consider marrying someone when you can't commit 100%? It is unfair to your fiancé. And you are obviously not ready to commit to a life-long relationship with someone when you have feelings for another person. Absolutely!!! I completely agree! Link to post Share on other sites
dg2003 Posted April 15, 2010 Share Posted April 15, 2010 I know how you feel. Of course it's easy to just say end it like its so simple but sometimes it's not that simple. I have been in the same situation for quite some time now. My bf and I broke up about a year ago and during that time I met this other guy. Now my bf is wanting to work things out, wanting to give me everything, wanting to marry me...But the problem is the other guy still has my heart or most of it. It's really hard and I wish I could tell you what the answer is, but i think we both know what it is, the tough thing is actually doing it. I hope things get better for you. Link to post Share on other sites
dazzle22 Posted April 15, 2010 Share Posted April 15, 2010 You must not get married to the first guy, thinking you will get over this 'phase'. It will be disaster. The first love of my life was not ready to get married so I married a different man whom I cared for, but not like my first love, thinking with time I would get over it, the feelings would fade. HUGE mistake. Had I waited, he would have come around, I found out later... 27 years later I found someone who finally eclipsed my first love, but my first marriage had a big ghost haunting it the entire time. This was a terrible mistake, and I beg you not to make the same one... Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted April 15, 2010 Share Posted April 15, 2010 Please break up with your fiance immediately. He really does deserve better. Let him go find a girl who wants to love only him. If you free him up you can spend all of your time trying to find out what's up with the guy you really love. Don't be selfish, let him go tonight. Link to post Share on other sites
reservoirdog1 Posted April 15, 2010 Share Posted April 15, 2010 Let me start at the beginning he was my fiance's best friend. Emphasis on the "was", presumably? Talk about a dick move on the "friend's" part... screwing his best buddy's girlfriend/fiance. So much for "bros before hoes." It sounds like your fiance is totally in the dark, both about you having it off with his buddy and the fact that you're totally committed to your fiance in words only. Let your fiance go. He deserves better. Link to post Share on other sites
Author BAM3289 Posted April 19, 2010 Author Share Posted April 19, 2010 Its not like that my fiance isn't stupid he knows that me and his buddy care about each other. Its his fault for breaking up with me that i slept w his best friend and he knows it. Anyway... me and buddy have recently came to terms with each other. We can continue to be friends like we was before all the drama. Thing is he's come around to me but he hasn't really came around to my fiance. He actually visited me at my house this morning conveniently while my fiance was at work. What do I think of that? Link to post Share on other sites
Ayjt Posted April 27, 2010 Share Posted April 27, 2010 I find it interesting how you blame your fiancée for your own actions. Also the fact that his friend is coming around when your fiancée is not there says he looks at you as more than just a friend. Add the fact he plays such a key roll in your life emotionally means you are taken by what he say and it he has great influence on you. Break it off with your fiancée as long as this other guy is in the picture. Link to post Share on other sites
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