Jacky Posted January 18, 2004 Share Posted January 18, 2004 I've been seeing a guy I work with for the past 6 months. It started off just as friends, then progressed into a sexual relationship (although we still haven't actually had sex). Anyway, he moved out of his ex's place about a month ago (long story, but don't worry they had been broken up since we started seeing each other), and although he talks about me coming over all the time, I'm hesitant. It's been leading to this for half a year and now I can't make the leap. I'm scared it will be an anti climax. I think I could fall hard for this guy and I don't know where I stand with him. I don't want to start sleeping with him only for things to stay where they are. On the other hand I think he might be just going with the flow and seeing where things lead and so having 'the conversation' will just push him away. Do casual relationships based on friendship have a good chance of making the transition into committed territory? Or am I deluding myself into thinking I won't end up getting my heart broken?? Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted January 18, 2004 Share Posted January 18, 2004 There are possiblities but no guarantees. Some of the very best relationships start out slow and work forward. Again, no guarantees whatsoever. If you don't want to pursue a relationship with a person because you're scared of being hurt, then you might want to try the convent. Otherwise, my advice to you is be smart, be cautious and proceed to the next level with this guy and see what happens. Going over to his place doesn't mean a lifetime committment...it doesn't even have to mean intercourse. Go there and watch some TV or videos. Let him know you want to continue to move slowly. No matter, there are people who get married and stay that way for years only to end up in hearbreak and pain. Relationships are not predictable. I think, though, that nuns have their own problems so I'm not so sure that's the direction you should go in either. Life's a real bitch sometimes. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted January 18, 2004 Share Posted January 18, 2004 Some of the very best relationships start out slow and work forward Just reminded me of a favourite song. One line "If you want to build your dream, take your time - go slowly". (Donovan; from Brother Sun, Sister Moon) Link to post Share on other sites
Arabess Posted January 18, 2004 Share Posted January 18, 2004 Just because he comes over....doesn't mean you have to sleep with him. Since he isn't with anyone else....why not handle it the same way you would any other relationship or date. If he mentions sex....make a joke that you are already having an affair with the 'Sexy Boss at the office' and are looking for a 'REAL boyfriend in your REAL life'..... That way, you've given him a great compliment....but have drawn some boundaries. Link to post Share on other sites
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