Reply texts (waiting period)

[just-me12]

There seems to be a bit of discussion on this, some guys and girls seem to think they are coming across to desperate so to put it if they send a message get know reply and then send another one (i dont know if that made sense)

Anyway what I'm asking, how long do you wait if you sent a message and didnt get a reply. I will use my situation as an example

 

I sent one at 10am this morning now 6pm, i know he could be busy with work and army reserves that he has tonight. Last time we spoke on sunday when i dropped him off, we kissed/pashed (whatever you call it here) goodbye, and he told me to message him how i went on my job trials I had on monday and that he had a really good weekend (we spent most of it together) only bad feedback i got from him was i was shy it was our second date on friday night and i met his friends on saturday night so he said it was understandable he would be a bit to, but he did say how good it was that his best friend go along with me really well (it is a girl best friend). Sex hasnt even been mentioned, I'm not use to working my way into a relationship like this it is normally full on straight away with i miss you messages and that all the time. So this is knew.

 

So how long should i wait, or do you wait....im thinking around 7pm tomoz night?

[Eeyore79]

I would send one message and be a bit annoyed if he didn't reply in a timely manner, and if I didn't hear anything I'd probably leave it until later in the evening and then send a "goodnight" text. If he made a habit of not replying at least on the same day, I'd dump him.

 

Tbh, a guy who lacks the manners to respond to a text isn't one I'd particularly want to date anyway. It only takes a second to reply; if he isn't into me enough to reply to a text then I really can't be bothered with him, because there are heaps of guys out there who would be falling over themselves to reply to a text from a pretty girl.

[Bartender]

When I'm really into somebody, I'll pretty much stop what I'm doing (within reason) to respond to that person if nothing else for reassurance they're a priority.

 

Unless I know they're busy due to work or other important priorities I expect the same in return. If they habitually don't respond in timely manner or return emotionless responses (eg. ok, no, yeah or other one word answers) I'll know where I stand and will usually move on.

[BubbleFreak]

Give him a chance to get back to you. What you said sounds fine, wait until tomorrow. There could be lots of reasons he hasn't replied to your text- perhaps he lost his phone or his battery died. But if he cares enough about you, he will want to keep in regular contact with you anyway and he will contact you soon enough.

 

If he doesn't text or get in contact with you, somehow, before tomorrow by all means try and contact him again. And ask him if he got your text.

 

People that play mind games/hard-to-get and deliberately don't respond to you in a timely manner are idiots imo.

[EthanH]

I have been in your shoes. And so i can understand what you are thinking. BUT you need to stop being bothered. There is a lot of talk about being needy/caring too much etc etc, and even if he doesn't know you are thinking about him too much, it is the fact that you are, and you have to realise that. If it isn't this, it will come over to him when you are with him. Fair enough you love him, but you need to stop worrying, stop thinking the worst, there are a million and one reasons why he might not have replied. IF the reason is something negative, you worrying about it, and then texting him again is not going to change that. If he wants to reply to you, he will! Stop worrying. Stop wasting your time with thinking about such things. Put yourself first. I know your instinct is still to worry about things...

 

I promise you, if you put yourself first more often, it will actually help your relationship!!! You are currently becoming too involved. you are both young, no-one likes the idea of someone worrying about what they feel about the relationship. Have confidence in yourself, if you don't, how can you expect her to.

Edited April 20, 2010 by EthanH

[123BeachFan]

Friday was your 2nd date, and yet you two spent most of the weekend together (Friday, Saturday, Sunday). That's a lot of time spent together with someone new.

 

You told him you'd text him. You did. Give him some space, and let him get back to you.

[USMCHokie]

As with any sort of correspondence, whether it's email, a voicemail, or a text message, I only give one. If I never get a response, then I'll move along. If they are truly interested, they will eventually respond. There's no need for these ridiculous text message games...