Compulsive shopping

[Mr White]

Anybody have this problem?

 

I'm beginning to suspect I might have a mild form of this. I say "mild", because in general I like the minimalist aesthetic and I hate clutter, so there is no way I'd accumulate too much stuff, but it is the way I approach shopping that makes me think. It is basically all impulsive purchases - I might be doing something completely unrelated and then just stumble at something I like, and then I'd just buy it, without checking the budget, forthcoming planned expenses etc. It's basically a state of mini-anxiety that gets resolved (temporarily), by buying whatever I stumbled upon; then followed by (mild) regret. So, it's a cycle.

 

It took me a long time to notice this, partly because I've moved a lot in the past - with little more than a carfull of belongings - but now that I'm settled, there's always something to buy for the house, for the professional wardrobe, camping stuff etc. - and I had virtually nothing while moving. But i'm pretty sure it's more than that, as I said, simply because of the way I shop (which is by now beyond necessities).

[SouthernSunshine]

I hate labels, but, I have several clothes in my closet with the tags still on them. I love shoes too!

[califnan]

Anybody have this problem?

 

I'm beginning to suspect I might have a mild form of this. I say "mild", because in general I like the minimalist aesthetic and I hate clutter, so there is no way I'd accumulate too much stuff, but it is the way I approach shopping that makes me think. It is basically all impulsive purchases - I might be doing something completely unrelated and then just stumble at something I like, and then I'd just buy it, without checking the budget, forthcoming planned expenses etc. It's basically a state of mini-anxiety that gets resolved (temporarily), by buying whatever I stumbled upon; then followed by (mild) regret. So, it's a cycle.

 

It took me a long time to notice this, partly because I've moved a lot in the past - with little more than a carfull of belongings - but now that I'm settled, there's always something to buy for the house, for the professional wardrobe, camping stuff etc. - and I had virtually nothing while moving. But i'm pretty sure it's more than that, as I said, simply because of the way I shop (which is by now beyond necessities).

 

------------------

 

I hear you .. I used to do flea markets - a diff one each Sunday.. One of the most uplifting experiences, just being in the beautiful outside air and environment, incl the vendors. I only stopped going because of the economy - but miss it very much, and did well on accumulating things for my house.

 

I tried to be a careful shopper, but still with a garage full of that that I intend to get together and sell ..

 

I think the shopping was an addiction, as is some of my other activities - such as internet ..

[Mr White]

I hate labels, but, I have several clothes in my closet with the tags still on them. I love shoes too!

 

Right..., same thing..., I already have relatively decent wardrobe - especially for a guy, but many of my shirts/suits have only been worn a handful of times; and 1 or 2 items - none at all. Yet in spite of that I'm still thinking **** like "I should also get this and that, that way everything will really be 'complete'" :rolleyes:.

 

Kinda reminds me of Ed Norton's character in "Fight club". Let's hope it won't end with me blowing my apartment up

 

It seems clear that there is serious emotional component to shopping, but it might play very differently for different backgrounds, personalities, temperaments. In my case it is probably a combination of fairly deprived childhood plus generally addictive personality (I used to have problems with alcohol, but thankfully I tamed that one almost 5 years ago...). I guess shopping is next...

[Mr White]

------------------

 

I hear you .. I used to do flea markets - a diff one each Sunday.. One of the most uplifting experiences, just being in the beautiful outside air and environment, incl the vendors. I only stopped going because of the economy - but miss it very much, and did well on accumulating things for my house.

 

I tried to be a careful shopper, but still with a garage full of that that I intend to get together and sell ..

 

I think the shopping was an addiction, as is some of my other activities - such as internet ..

 

Yep, don't get me started on the flea markets and the antique shops. Just last week I dropped 40$ on a side table. It is nice and all, but I didn't really need it, and although this is not a lot of money, it would have been much better used to pay down debt. I rarely make huge purchases, but the steady stream of small impulsive ones like that adds up really quickly.

Thank god my place is small, so my minimalist tendencies help quell this somewhat. (Not that this is a real solution - sometimes I'd clear up space, only to fill it soon after).

[califnan]

Yep, don't get me started on the flea markets and the antique shops. Just last week I dropped 40$ on a side table. It is nice and all, but I didn't really need it, and although this is not a lot of money, it would have been much better used to pay down debt. I rarely make huge purchases, but the steady stream of small impulsive ones like that adds up really quickly.

Thank god my place is small, so my minimalist tendencies help quell this somewhat. (Not that this is a real solution - sometimes I'd clear up space, only to fill it soon after).

 

----------------------

 

I Love antiquing and decorating.. Have been doing the antique shopping for a lot of years.

 

I knew a dealer at one of the antique shows who was so disciplined that she and her husband had a deal that everytime she would purchase - she would also sell an item. I am not that disciplined, and eBay has also made it easy to get deals at times..

 

I think $40. was a good price for your table .. maybe you could wheel and deal to make it more worth your while.

 

The economy is Down but I will test the waters soon as I get straightened up in the geerage - and try a garage sale, try to get rid of the big things - but will hold the sacrificing on the smaller items for a flea market, if need be. ..

....And that is the plan .. ha

[bentnotbroken]

:bunny::bunny:ME!!!!!:bunny::(My counselor and I figured out compulsive shopping was one of the ways that I dealt with my depression. It was(is) one of my drugs. During the emotional upheaval of Mr. Messy's A I probably spent more hundreds on each shopping trip. I hurt, I shopped. Little things too. I also love flea markets, yard sales, thrift stores and amazon. :( It's better now, but every once in a while...........................

[califnan]

:bunny::bunny:ME!!!!!:bunny::(My counselor and I figured out compulsive shopping was one of the ways that I dealt with my depression. It was(is) one of my drugs. During the emotional upheaval of Mr. Messy's A I probably spent more hundreds on each shopping trip. I hurt, I shopped. Little things too. I also love flea markets, yard sales, thrift stores and amazon. :( It's better now, but every once in a while...........................

 

------------------

 

I hear you .. a great void filler ..

[You Go Girl]

I'm an antique dealer. So please don't cure yourself.

 

I also watch the show hoarders on a regular basis. It's really interesting the way these people's minds work. They somehow are comforted by being surrounded by things. I kind of 'get it' in a way....

 

I never collected things in the past, but since I've become an antique dealer, I find myself with two rooms full, and I mean to the ceiling!...hopefully most of it isn't for me!

It's very common for people in my profession to have a backload of goods.

 

Probably a few questions you could ask yourself when thinking about buying something:

1) Do I need it.

2) If it's not a need, but a want, do I have room for it, and where will I put it.

3) How are the finances at this point and time?

 

Hopefully I won't end up with only a pathway for rooms as I age, nor with more than 2 cats at a time.

I'm working on getting it into the antique store, or online store, as quickly as I purchase it, instead of purchasing far more than selling, as I was the last few years.

Too bad amazon doesn't let sellers sell vintage

[LoveLace]

Once, a few years ago, I knew I had a shopping problem when I would get home and not even recall purchasing certain items..as though I'd black out at some point while shopping...weird!

 

It was a habit for me to go on a huge shopping spree and run up credit cards, to get something off my mind, when in fact that thing was actually on my mind the whole time, in a way. If I liked it, I'd buy it, weather it was clothes, accessories, or interior decor. I spent $800 I didn't even have to decorate my apartment (it was a great excuse to go shopping).

 

They also say your going overboard if there are things in your closet that still have a price tag and has never been worn...I definitely had that problem. I also had that habit of yanking it off the rack without even checking the price...oh that's horrible...

 

Luckily I didnt need intervention, lol, but now I just limit myself to buying 1 or 2 things when I shop (unless I have lots of extra cash that is okay to spend). Even then I can still be dangerous and go over that limit sometimes; I walk into places and feel overwhelmed by all the things I like and I'm afraid if I had a credit card still, that I'd be buying all of it. I still have a ton of clothes that only get worn once or twice because I love new things way too much...

[laRubiaBonita]

my MIL is a compulsive QVC shopper....... i don't get it she ALWAYS has qvc on.

apparently it has caused quite the financial hardships for my H's family.

 

i also lived with a lady that was a compulsive shopper- to the tune of over $100K in debt.

 

my mother is a buyer of junk too- every weekend she is out yardsaling, she gets good stuffat bargain deals, and that is the draw for her.... that haggling the price down.

 

i like to shop at thrift store and consignment shoppes- i look for a good deal too. wednesday is half price day at one of the thrift shoppes- i just got a bunch of stuff

 

but i do not go thrifting as much as i used to.

[califnan]

I'm an antique dealer. So please don't cure yourself.

 

I also watch the show hoarders on a regular basis. It's really interesting the way these people's minds work. They somehow are comforted by being surrounded by things. I kind of 'get it' in a way....

 

I never collected things in the past, but since I've become an antique dealer, I find myself with two rooms full, and I mean to the ceiling!...hopefully most of it isn't for me!

It's very common for people in my profession to have a backload of goods.

 

Probably a few questions you could ask yourself when thinking about buying something:

1) Do I need it.

2) If it's not a need, but a want, do I have room for it, and where will I put it.

3) How are the finances at this point and time?

 

Hopefully I won't end up with only a pathway for rooms as I age, nor with more than 2 cats at a time.

I'm working on getting it into the antique store, or online store, as quickly as I purchase it, instead of purchasing far more than selling, as I was the last few years.

Too bad amazon doesn't let sellers sell vintage

 

--------------------

 

I too have a backload. Started selling some things on eBay, but a hard time getting my reserve, and many items didn't sell. .. Unless an item is really hot or sought after..

 

Consignment shops are more rare now, an antique dealer wants you to rent a space. I have done that too..

 

I will have a garage sale and see if I can get rid of some of the larger furniture pieces .. and maybe rent a space and take the smalls to an antique flea market

 

Do you have any ideas as to how to get your money out of things - and in this economy?

[Lizzie60]

I am a shopholic.. and a compulsive buyer...

[Star Gazer]

After my afternoon of shopping, for a split second I thought I might have a shopping problem. In shoes alone, I came home with 6 new pairs. But then I realized that I haven't shopped for myself since well before Thanksgiving, and that all of my purchases were of awesome pieces and I got great deals. So now I don't feel as bad.

[SadandConfusedWA]

I have had a serious problem with this for years and am unable to go a week without purchasing anything (clothes, make up, shoes, bags, jewlery...). I am also known to go out and blow $1000 in a few hours on regular bases. If I am happy - I celebrate by shopping. If I am sad - I cheer myself up with shopping. My problem is probably worse than anyone's in this thread.

 

I have multiple clothes with tags still on them, and even more clothes that I only wore once or twice. I also hide my purchases form everyone because I know that what I am doing is not normal.

 

Over the years, my tastes have evolved to only want expensive/luxury brands and it really does the damage on my wallet. Sometimes I can bring myself to return a few items but often I can't even do that.

 

My job keeps me out of serious debt (although just about) but I could be saving money towards purchasing better property or travel which I am blowing on basically nothing.