friend or lover?

[jamiesda]

ok so i need some opinions on a relationship i have with this girl. im an australian and have been in canada for the past 6 months bout 3 months ago i met this girl through a friend and we both instantly knew there was something different about each other. the first night at the party i was hanging out talking to people and she put a piece of paper in my pocket and gave me a kiss on the cheek, i read the paper later and it said "smile you are loved". she lived in a different town bout 45 minutes away from me we saw each other everynow and then every couple of weeks but always with groups of people. one day i was hungover and slept all day in her bed and she came in and slept in there with me i woke up at one stage and she had her leg and arm over me cuddling me. anyway thats how we started. we eventually became awesome friends and get along like a house on fire she. shes a bit of a party animal and kissed a few random guys while out which didnt really bother me.

 

ok so eventually she moved to my town and got a job at my ski hill and posed as my gf so that we could get a room together, this is where it gets complicated. we pushed the 2 single beds together and shared a bed for about a month and a half. occasionally wen we were drunk or something wed put an arm around each other in bed. she is so comfortable with me she is a little shy with her body but will strip to her underwear in front of me. sometimes all our friends would cram into a hotel room and she would make sure we had a spot to sleep together and sometimes we would fall asleep with our heads touching and it wouldnt be weird. she would come home from being out with her friends an tell me all she wanted to do was come home and hangout with me in bed. all this sounds well and good right? but we never even kissed. i slowly developed a crush but told myself i didnt becuase we were such good friends. everyone that doesnt know thinks were a couple cos were always together.

 

anyway my last day in canada she was crying most of the day and hiding it from me. the last night we spent together we had a few drinks and slept in a bed together at a friends house and i put my arm around her she held my hand and we spooned which we had never really done before, and she kept pushing her butt back into me effectionatly which i pulled back from slightly (because i was kinda turned on haha) i kissed her on the shoulder and she kissed my hand, so we spooned and slept. she later described the night to one of our friends as "too good" and told her that she has never experienced a friendship like this and told her how its crazy that weve never even kissed.

 

shes now coming to australia to try and work with me again and made me promise wed be room mates.

 

do you think were too good friends to take it any further? do you guys think there is something there? should i? and how do i make a move after this long? do u think she feels something but might think im not keen? any advice would be awesome.

 

sorry bout the novel of a thread but yeh wanted to give u all the details so u could get a good idea of our relationship

[jamiesda]

98 views and no advice? someone got to have an opinion haha

[WTRanger]

You are putting yourself into the friendszone buddy. If I am sleeping with a girl and she's pressing her butt into me, I'm not going to back away from it regardless if I'm turned on or not.

 

She keeps using the word friends, and that's what she sees you as. She's giving you chances and you keep side-stepping them.

[nigh2]

I would say you got a good thing going with this girl...I wouldn't worry about being in the friendzone or not, just because you havn't made a move or because you havn't done **** with her doens't make a difference, Im sure she probably has more respect for you that it hasn't happend, doens't mean that it cant happen. I would keep doing what your doing. Take things as they come, just because you might not take every opportunity to go further with the girl doens't mean much....at least IMO...

 

Good luck with her man, treat her like you have, and treat her good, maybe show that your into her. You dont necassarily have to go to extrememes to do that, as in sex....but hey, dont screw up a relationship because your afraid that youve been friend zoned....just live man...like I said good luck.

[WTRanger]

I would say you got a good thing going with this girl...I wouldn't worry about being in the friendzone or not, just because you havn't made a move or because you havn't done **** with her doens't make a difference, Im sure she probably has more respect for you that it hasn't happend, doens't mean that it cant happen. I would keep doing what your doing. Take things as they come, just because you might not take every opportunity to go further with the girl doens't mean much....at least IMO...

 

Good luck with her man, treat her like you have, and treat her good, maybe show that your into her. You dont necassarily have to go to extrememes to do that, as in sex....but hey, dont screw up a relationship because your afraid that youve been friend zoned....just live man...like I said good luck.

 

Great advice if the OP wants to continue to look like a Ken doll to this girl. He's perfect in every way, minus the dick. He's been "just living" with this girl and it's so far still stuck in neutral. If you want to push it forward, you actually have to do some pushing.

 

Once the OP started developing the crush, the so called "friendship" was ruined. He's looking for the next level and she's just happy she's with a neutered man.

 

However, be prepared for the "I love you like a brother" bombshell she will undoubtedly drop on you. She's continued to show interest and inexplicably you've sidestepped it each time. You've got to stop being afraid of getting rejected.

 

What are you going to do when she finds a man in her life? If you keep this up, you'll get to hear all about this great new guy in her life. That's going to be so much fun isn't it?

[mixedupman]

Let her know how you feel, do something, or else like the last poster said, you'll soon be hearing all about this other great guy she's met.

[xpaperxcutx]

I wouldn't call you guys lovers because you guys didn't exactly " sleep" with each other.

 

So why exactly is she going to Australia? Just to work there? Coincidence, or maybe she has you as an incentive to make the trip?

 

If there's one thing you cannot deny it's that you like her but you're too " chicken" to take the next step. For your sake, I hope she's still single when she rooms with you. Otherwise, you'll always regret the what ifs.