starscollide Posted April 27, 2010 Share Posted April 27, 2010 Something that baffles me til this day...if you and your ex have both moved on, are with other people, and are still in light contact, is their a significance to them texting you on important events in their relationship? On my ex's one year, he texted me that morning. That threw me a bit, but I figured it was coincidence. Throughout his relationship, which is now an open relationship according to facebook, he's kept this up. We come and go out of each others lives, always on pretty good terms. He texted me the day before New Years, then again the same day he attended a family event for the girl he's dating. Then again a week later, which was right before going on vacation with his friends. If you're with someone else, even just dating someone without a commitment, why still contact your ex on important events of that "relationship?" Link to post Share on other sites
ADF Posted April 27, 2010 Share Posted April 27, 2010 In my experience, ex's--and I'm talking here mainly about male ex's--make contact with their former partners for one reason and one reason only: to try and rekindle something. You say your ex is now in an "open" relationship. I don't know him, but I'd bet dollars to donuts that he is hoping for some kind of FWB arrangment with you, and is starting to test the waters. Link to post Share on other sites
D-Lish Posted April 27, 2010 Share Posted April 27, 2010 Don't respond. He's fishing.... Makes you wonder if he did the same thing to you while you were with him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author starscollide Posted April 27, 2010 Author Share Posted April 27, 2010 In my experience, ex's--and I'm talking here mainly about male ex's--make contact with their former partners for one reason and one reason only: to try and rekindle something. You say your ex is now in an "open" relationship. I don't know him, but I'd bet dollars to donuts that he is hoping for some kind of FWB arrangment with you, and is starting to test the waters. We've done that before...but whats weird is we hung out 2 weeks ago and he played guitar for me. I later found out that he'd gone to a family get-together at her house and in the pictures, he looks pretty unhappy. I chalk it up to coincidence. I thought nothing of it. A week later he wanted to hang out again, we didn't even hook up, and he drove me home. He hasn't driven me home in years, and I only live 3 blocks away so I usually walk if we hang out. I do still consider him a friend, and it felt like getting to know someone new because we haven't dated in years. 2 days later, he went to Florida with this girl and her friend, apparently she funded that trip or it was a present to him or something I don't know. He's outright told me he's talking to other girls and I'm currently just playing the field as well. We've done the FWB thing back and forth for years... What gets me is he wanted to hang out and just talk, brought up our past relationship in passing, knowing he's about to go on vacation with this girl? He texted me on their one year back when they were official, all the really big dates in their relationship he's either asked to hang out or has texted me randomly. Link to post Share on other sites
ADF Posted April 27, 2010 Share Posted April 27, 2010 We've done that before...but whats weird is we hung out 2 weeks ago and he played guitar for me. I later found out that he'd gone to a family get-together at her house and in the pictures, he looks pretty unhappy. I chalk it up to coincidence. I thought nothing of it. A week later he wanted to hang out again, we didn't even hook up, and he drove me home. He hasn't driven me home in years, and I only live 3 blocks away so I usually walk if we hang out. I do still consider him a friend, and it felt like getting to know someone new because we haven't dated in years. 2 days later, he went to Florida with this girl and her friend, apparently she funded that trip or it was a present to him or something I don't know. He's outright told me he's talking to other girls and I'm currently just playing the field as well. We've done the FWB thing back and forth for years... What gets me is he wanted to hang out and just talk, brought up our past relationship in passing, knowing he's about to go on vacation with this girl? He texted me on their one year back when they were official, all the really big dates in their relationship he's either asked to hang out or has texted me randomly. You know what? Something is making me doubt how "open" his relationship with this other woman is. Maybe I'm wrong, but I would consider the possibility he's lying. Link to post Share on other sites
Author starscollide Posted April 27, 2010 Author Share Posted April 27, 2010 Part of staying in touch with the ex means having a psuedo friendship in which he's admitted he's been cheating on her the entire time they've been together, even when they were official. Yet now, he's posting statuses on facebook that say "Kevin *insert last name* is so casual right now", and every friend he's added is a girl. Why stay with a girl that you're cheating on is what I don't get? I'm not saying he should be with me either because every issue that was there when we dated is still there. But this blows my mind. He's untagged every pic of them together, has his relationship status set to say nothing, yet goes on vacation with her and goes to family events like the doting boyfriend? Yet she thinks everything is perfectly fine and they have a great relationship. Part of it is thats the stuff I could never handle when we were together. He's naturally very charming, and he'd flirt when we were together. He treats me better now that we're just friends and there's no pressure I guess. I just don't understand how he can do that, and how she can see all this and still stay with him either. Link to post Share on other sites
ADF Posted April 27, 2010 Share Posted April 27, 2010 Why stay with a girl that you're cheating on is what I don't get? I'm not saying he should be with me either because every issue that was there when we dated is still there. But this blows my mind. He's untagged every pic of them together, has his relationship status set to say nothing, yet goes on vacation with her and goes to family events like the doting boyfriend? Yet she thinks everything is perfectly fine and they have a great relationship. The more you describe this guy, the creepier he sounds. Now I am absolutely convinced he is not in an "open" relationship with this woman. At least not that she knows of. I doubt this woman would be so eager to present him to her family if she didn't think they were in a monogamous relationship. Nor would her family be likely to regard him as her BF if they knew he was seeing other women. This guy is a player. And like all players, he probably secretly hates women. He probably does what he does as much for ego gratification as for sexual gratification. Bedding lots of women probably makes him feel like a "real man." Adding to the thrill is the fact he is fooling and secretly humiliating his supposedly monogamous GF, "getting over on her," as the saying goes. He sounds like a liar, a cheater and a con artist. In other words, extremely attractive to women. Link to post Share on other sites
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