My ex's ex is a psycho!!

[Nebula]

Ok, so I recently broke up with my ex, almost a couple of weeks ago...

 

And you this process for me has been about cleansing, I have missed him but I am trying to keep an open mind to better things, better people, and just move on.

 

Well it turns out this PSYCHO GIRL FROM HELL, called HIS mom to tell her I'd written her an email insulting her and telling her a bunch of personal stuff... she had my addy and phone number... so she probably was talking to his mom all heartbroken and offended, to the point where HIS MOM KICKED HIS OUT OF THE HOUSE... of course now his mom hates me more, and so does he.

 

Oh yeah to make things worse, he's actually staying at his ex's place, supposedly the ex is in the US and is coming back next week. He says he's gonna move out soon he just needs to find a place, whatever.

 

Having said this - IT TURNS OUT HE BELIEVES IT WAS ME... but I didn't do ANYTHING! I have NEVER EVER tried contacting her in any way, but what's the catch, about 4 months ago I'd been in his email address after one break up and I told him and he lost a lot of trust in me, so now he thinks I did it.

 

He asks, "how does she have your email addy and phone number?"

 

Well let's see, she's been in his email account before where my # was, and early in the relationship access to the cell phone.

 

She says she knew I was afraid I was pregnant... well I got paranoid for a few days but hell if I know how she found out or guessed, she talks to his sister so maybe she told her, I don't know! And that was a couple of weeks ago too, I know I'm not and have for a while (thank God).

 

"Why would she do that if she's over me and has a new boyfriend, and why didn't she do it before when she really hated you?"

 

Man ask her, maybe she wants revenge because she hates me so much, maybe she's not over you, maybe she hates you too, I DON'T KNOW, I DIDN'T DO IT.

 

I hate being falsely accused. I've never done anything like that, I never will. If I were to contact her in any way it wouldn't have been to insult her in any way. This is such bs. I'm not like that, I'm bigger than this crap.

 

I'm so mad, because he's not even with me anymore, so it's stupid. The more reason to not worry about it though, because it's not of my business, but man it doesn't feel nice that the person you gave your whole heart to for 8 months thinks you did something so stupid like that, and that he'd give her more credibility regardless of the long road of schemes she has come up with before. Oh because she has turned out to be one very evil, manipulating person, always crying to the right people about the wrongs that have been done to her, always ommitting the wrongs she's done herself, faking pregnancies, and now this. And he knows this, I messed up once when I went in that account and NEVER did again, even though I could have gotten his password I didn't do it because I knew how wrong it was to do it in the first place, everything I gave him is thrown away by this crazy evil girl who just keeps messing up people's lives.

 

Evidently I doubt I'll ever talk to him again, having him not believe me (he's in the right to doubt but not dismiss my truth), and having this psycho person in the way even though what she did was pointless because we're over not intending to get back together again.

 

I'm just baffled why people are so evil sometimes. AND SO VERY MAD.

 

M.

[Arabess]

I have a policy that when someone says I 'said or did' anything which I did NOT 'say or do'.....I'll confront them with a group of witnesses. I simply won't let anyone do that to me.

 

If this is really upsetting you....try to set up a meeting with all parties involved. If she doesn't show up....well, her guilt is obvious to all those who DID show up.

[midori]

Where is this email?

 

If she still has the email it's easy enough to view the expanded header to see the IP address of the sender. Even if it was sent from a Yahoo email account or other web-based email, the IP address will be visible.

 

If she doesn't still have the email, that ought to give those who believe her some food for thought.

 

More importantly, if someone who ought to know better than to suspecct you of wrong-doing accuses you of something like this, you have to wonder just what sort of person they are. Frankly it sounds like you're better off without this ex in your life. At least for the time being.

 

Tell your ex that you didn't do it and you'd like to see the email you have been accused of sending. If the email no longer exists, my guess is that this woman created the nasty email herself, and sent it to herself using a different email account. If she even bothered to create a fake email.

 

I'd take dramatic steps to reduce the amount of space you allow your ex in your life. He doesn't sound like a good friend, if he could believe that of you.

[Nebula]

Ok I asked my ex to send me this email. It was constructed using punctuation I don't use, a different writing style, and things she tried to incorporate to show her being knowledgeable in ways, didn't even make sense. A bunch of little things could be argued as to why I wouldn't say some of the stuff she said, because she said stuff he knows I don't think. And it was mostly about the stuff she did anyway, as if I was supposedly telling her what he told me she did, which is quite foolish.

 

I tried checking for headers and IPs, but in the end it wasn't even necessary.

 

I started inspecting this email, and noticed two things. It had this link to scan and download the attachment and every time I clicked it, it opened a new Yahoo! window to sign in, which of course doesn't make sense, normal behaviour would dictate that the browser goes to a new window to scan the attachment for viruses, or open a message window asking if the user wants to save it or open it. Also, the From header was edited incorrectly, as it has one " which just didn't make sense, because from headers look like "name" <[email protected]> so even if I could manage to send it without my name which I couldn't do, it could never look like that. Even if my name was set as just ", it would look like """. If I left one space if yahoo allowed me it'd look like " ". But never ". And I couldn't remove my name at all because it just pulled it from my general account info.

 

All this to figure out all she had to do was copy a forwarded message, paste it in a Compose window that supports HTML, and edit it as she wished, typed in whatever she wanted. I mean, come on. It's even more sad she couldn't get it right. Also that Scan and download link that's being copied belongs to another message, that's why it doesn't act the way its supposed to. I did what she did and the exact thing happened.

 

Well my ex believes me now, but he hasn't really told me he's upset at what she did. But in a way it doesn't even matter, because more than anything I was bugged by her disrespecting me and poisoning others minds against me, but at least now for anyone that wants to judge me, there's your evidence, do as you will and if you still don't believe me well then that's your problem, not mine. Because I didn't do anything.

 

It is better that I'm not with this person anymore because of what you just said, he should know me better than to think I'd do something like that, more so knowing she HAS done things like that before.

 

I don't want to confront her though, because I just really don't want her to be a factor in my life. She's a crazy woman, who obviously can't seem to let this guy go even though I already did and have no intentions in "fighting" for him, she's a liar, a snake and a very manipulative person. And she shouldn't even be my problem anymore if I'm not even with this guy. I just figure telling her anything would create more conflict which is something I really don't want, I just want to put him and everything that comes along with it behind, especially her.

 

Thank you for the replies.

 

M.

[Nebula]

What I'm going to talk about is related to the first post, so I'll keep it here, I need some input.

 

Well so the girl came back from the US, either yesterday or Thursday, I don't know.

 

This morning, at about 8 am, I got 7 phone calls in a row from an unknown number. At first I figured it was a wrong number and anything I had to say wouldn't make sense because I was so sleepy But then when the phone calls kept coming I pondered on either a wrong number from someone very eager, an emergency, and even more dreadful, her. I didn't know though.

 

So I wake up eventually and check my email... what do I find, 2 emails from her! Telling me to stop writing her hateful emails, to leave her alone, I've ruined her life and caused her so much pain, bla bla.... and the problem is like I said, I've NEVER written her anything, so what's this about? Playing innocent with the one person who KNOWS 100% without a doubt she's making it all up? There wasn't a third party involved, her writing style even matched the one she pretended was from me.

 

I was going to write her back, but thankfully didn't have time. I was going to be civil because I wanted to see what's up.

 

Eventually it turns out the phone calls were from her, and I got another phone call from another number. I was in class so I didn't answer.

 

And that's not even it!

 

I got a msg on my cell phone too. Saying stuff like, "now you can be happy now that I've kicked him out of my life, you can be his sex toy now" or whatever.

 

So now it's like... I'm NOT going to write her back because I'm afraid she'd just use it against me regardless of how civil I am... besides she's INSANE so how can I reason with her...

 

Am I right for not writing her back? I don't want her tampering with real emails from me, so I think that might be a good decision.

 

As for the calling, she hasn't done it since morning, but I wonder how I should approach it in case she does it again. I mean I'm not the type to yell at anybody, so if I were to answer at all, I'd be completely civil, even with her because I just can't yell at a stranger like that...

 

I mean, I'd just want to tell her like, "listen, I broke up with him and we're not getting back together, so it's really unnecessary for you to make up this big mess and even worse suck me into something I have nothing to do with anymore"...

 

But I don't know, being the little scared girl that I am, I got all nervous when my phone rang later and it was my mom

 

She's just very dysfunctional if she not only fabricates these emails, tells ME to not do it anymore, and then constantly tells ME to leave HER alone when she's the one bugging me in every way she can, obsessively. She's even saying I'm pregnant for God's sakes! Well I guess she's up to something, but I'm afraid to know what and don't wanna do anything that helps her go through with it, as she hates me enough to make this mess.

 

Any thoughts, advice?

 

Thanks :-/

 

M.

[faux]

Originally posted by Nebula ...

Any thoughts, advice?

 

Thanks :-/

 

M.

 

Yes... And I hope you listen to my thoughts and advice

 

Don't confront her. That will only encourage her. Don't block her email address, but rather sort it into her own little special folder. Don't read them OR respond though -- Just let her send you more harassing emails and have them safely filed away for evidence/reference. Also, don't tell anyone she is in contact with/ever was in contact with when she bothers you again.

 

If she phones you, write down the time of day the phone call happened, and the date. Try to be as specific as you can. If she leaves you any voice mails/messages save them as well. If it's an unavailable number, check with your phone company (or wireless provider as it may be) for information on tracing that phone call. Find out if it is her, and what you can do.

 

Save this information. She's bothering you, actually harassing you. You have a right to go to the police and file charges against her. Just make sure you have all the evidence and information I told you to keep. Just be SURE that the times/dates/etc. are as specific as can be! This is very important!

 

Don't encourage her again, and she should get bored and go away. If not, you'll have information so the police can help you.

[Nebula]

Thanks Faux, luckily it wasn't necessary.

 

That's all she ever did...

 

Of course apparently she's still bugging my ex, complaining about me and I'll bet many other things, and he told her that "I was going to leave her alone and stop writing her stuff", "to avoid creating any further conflict".... I'm not sure this is a good thing. I mean, sure they're avoiding further argument, but what if he does believe her and he tells me he believes me for that exact same reason? If he were my bf I wouldn't accept this.

 

Its just weird because as I started feeling sorry for her and I asked him if she'd be saying more crap he was just so passive about it it made me wonder what's really going on with them. So now I'm mad again. lol

 

Eventually with that whole conversation he just got mad because he said I said some cold things so now he thinks I never cared about him, I know this just sounds like shifting the subject but like I said, I did say some mean things to prove my innocence. Still, I don't think I said anything particularly bad in thay convo, just something like I wasn't standing in her way anymore...

 

So anyway, I know I shouldn't talk to him anymore (I'm so hard-headed) but at least I'm glad she hasn't done anything else... well I guess that whole him telling her he believed her was all she wanted since she backed off. Make me look like a *censored*.

 

I just don't understand these two, as far as I know he cheated on her, they had strong fights with yelling and object-throwing (from her anyway), she would physically hurt him, hitting and scratching, they humiliated it each other all the time, and yet she's so clingy... I think they're just one of those people who can't get enough of each other but they clash so strongly they'll end up destroying each other or something. I just don't want to be caught in between their crossfire.

 

I wish I could say it didn't bug me that they could get back together but it does, even if I broke up with him I feel like even though I know I was a really good gf he'd still go back to someone as messed up, and the only explanation I'd find is that either he still has feelings for her, or he's just a bastard and will be with her to use her in whichever way he can, because she'll let her. Either way it makes me feel bad because it makes my relationship with him lose so much meaning.

 

I know I sound like a little kid, I'm 22 but I've just never had to deal with something like this before.

 

M.

[Pretteangel]

WAY TO MUCH DRAMA!