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Dear Ex,

 

You have taken over my brain and held it hostage for the past 3 weeks. I think that it's time for you to stop being so selfish and move out. Now it doesn't have to happen right away, but maybe we can start with bedtime. Do you think it would possible for you to find another place, other than my brain, to sleep at night? I really don't enjoy waking up anxious in the middle of the night, and having you be the first thing on my mind when I wake up isn't really helping with this whole healing process. Okay? Good. I'm glad we had that talk.

 

Love,

TLH

 

P.S. Maybe next week we can move you into a smaller room in my brain? I mean I know it's nice to have all that space all to yourself, but it's exhausting to watch over you all the time making sure you don't cause too much damage. Okay? Thanks.

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Dear TLH,

 

You were right, I woke up this morning to the sound of thunder and rain pinging against my windows. Oh well, Maybe tomorrow.

 

Rob

 

p.s - it's not up to your ex to move out of your brain, it's up to you to kick him out, start by thinking about other things instead of him, like raindrops on roses or whiskers on kittens, oops, I better stop before I break into song and I sing horrible, stay strong, you'll make it.

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