Would it be fair for me to make a move?

[Ajones92]

As a background, there's been this girl I've fancied for a while. Last month, I got the courage to ask her out, only to learn that she had been dating someone for a couple months. I was a bit shocked, since she had never bought him up before and I was sure she was single, since she never mentioned any other guy. I was chill about it though, and we still stayed friends.

 

Earlier this week, I learned that her boyfriend had broken up with her. Since I've known her (about two years), this is the fourth guy that she's been with, and she's an emotional wreck after every break up, a phase that lasts a few weeks at a time. We had lunch this past Thursday, and she wasn't completely attentive. She also spoke very vaguely when I asked her what happened.

 

Now, I want to prove to her that not all guys are the same... and I have very little time. You see, I will be going to a different state for a summer job on the 15th of May, and she will be staying behind here. She's a very attractive and driven woman, so I know she'll find someone else over summer. If I don't make a move now, I don't know if I'll ever get closure on the situation, and I know I'll regret it if someone else beats me to her again. However, since we'll be so far apart over the summer, the situation is complicated. She's also very emotionally drained and vulnerable right now.

 

My current plan is to take her out to lunch again this week, and then give her a poem (that I will write myself) to make her feel better about herself. This is where my problem comes in... does it seem selfish that I want to make a move on her a week after her break up? She will still be vulnerable, but I know that if I don't make the move soon I won't be able to at all. What are your thoughts?

 

If you need more information, let me know.

[In-The-Wheat]

Don't do the poem dude, go get some drinks & explain that you understand her situation, but you would like to see if you guys could work or something. If there's a good vibe, just ask her out to dinner.

 

I'm guessing though that this isn't going to work out, sorry to say - she's an emotional wreck right now AND you are leaving soon. I would not get your hopes up at all. How can you even start a relationship if you are going to see each other for a whole 2 weeks then leave. Honestly, just make it through til you leave & you'll be meeting all types of girls.

[WTRanger]

It's quite selfish to expect her to do a long-distance relationship with so little notice. Plus with such a new relationship starting at long distance, the chances of one of you cheating or backing out is at an all time high.

 

I say go do your thing for the summer, let things cool down, and then make your move when you get back.