A Serious Question for Those Who Hate Porn

[dreamingoftigers]

I am going to have to ask again: BUT WHAT DO YOU PROPOSE TO DO ABOUT IT?

 

I swear, I have never seen people on LS have so much trouble staying on topic. But I guess that tells me something.

 

Maybe we could send all men who choose to watch porn to mandatory sex ed classes to balance out all of the BS they pick up from porn.

[dreamingoftigers]

That was an excellent explanation of it.

 

I recall back in the late 70s with experiences pre porn. It seemed more spontaneous and fun. Yes they were still clueless on how to please a woman but that was because of youth and inexperience.

 

Plus I never ever never felt I was being compared to someone else or to porn. I never got the feeling when they didn't want to do it that it was because he had been previously wanking to porn. Also the guys were completely fine with full trimmed muff and weren't flipping over normal natural public hair like the boys are today and that is because of porn influence.

 

I wish I could explain how it makes me feel but it is difficult to put into words.

 

Finding out about my H porn habits and that he was replacing our sex life with the porn was so devastating. I can't get it out of my head that if we haven't h had sex in several days it is because he is too busy wanking to porn. I agree that the sex is boring and mechanical. I would like to try some different things and do it in different places but it is the same 2-3 positions and hardly any foreplay and no oral for me.

 

I never really cared about porn before all this. I just thought it was just something guys do occasionally. I didn't realize it could be an addiction or they replace a real sex life with it.

 

Thank you for your story, it is nice to know that someone else gets it. Maybe that will fend off some of the guys who say that it doesn't affect anything.

[stace79]

LS has featured many long and heated threads about the alleged dangers of men watching pornography. My question is simple. For those in the anti-porn camp, and especially those who see porn as a dangerous social influence, what do you propose to do about it?

 

No one on LS, so far as I know, has advocated censorship. But what's left? Aside from trying to shame or berate men for looking at porn, what concrete, specific steps do you propose society take to deal with what you see as a grave social problem?

 

After reading some of this thread, I have come to the conclusion that I am not against porn. What I am against is how most porn portrays women. I will even admit that I like to watch some porn on occasion.

 

What disgusts me is that men want to degrade women so much, especially in porn. When I see the porn that is common nowadays, it appears that these men don't actually want a woman -- they want a hole to screw every which way to Sunday (sorry if that's crude, but that's really how I see it).

 

They want a being to take whatever nasty thing they can come up with -- and I know you know what I'm talking about.

 

So, it doesn't bother me so much that men want to view sexually explicit material -- it's how the women are treated in the material they seem to enjoy and request most.

[blair08]

"BUT WHAT DO YOU PROPOSE TO DO ABOUT IT?"

 

 

I guess get involved in organizations that are against it? Read up on it and find what can be done etc, I dunno.

 

I would suggest to, googling Shelley Lubben, and then going to her pages, I know she has a MySpace page, and she was a porn actress who has started an organization on it. Her and her husband both were in porn and got out of it. So he is also in this with her. Tells of her story and others who broke free from it. Her and others tell the other side of it. Of course the ones who do not wish to know the other side, its probably best to not read it, I'm sure they would find something wrong with it anyway.

[Jersey Shortie]

After reading some of this thread, I have come to the conclusion that I am not against porn. What I am against is how most porn portrays women. I will even admit that I like to watch some porn on occasion.

 

What disgusts me is that men want to degrade women so much, especially in porn. When I see the porn that is common nowadays, it appears that these men don't actually want a woman -- they want a hole to screw every which way to Sunday (sorry if that's crude, but that's really how I see it).

 

They want a being to take whatever nasty thing they can come up with -- and I know you know what I'm talking about.

 

So, it doesn't bother me so much that men want to view sexually explicit material -- it's how the women are treated in the material they seem to enjoy and request most.

 

This is a good point. I undestand why people want to see others naked. I understand why wanting to see how other people have sex is intriguing to some. But the amount of stuff that is out there and the amount of time that people spend looking at it today, is pretty disturbing. The fact that most porn is about how men want to see women and if we go by porn, apparently alot of men want to see women used like a hole, and not a person, is sad. Just as Stace said in her excellent post. This is why I always say that it's not sex that is bad when people try to make it seem like I am against sex. It's this medium that is used and how porn protrays women that is disturbing. And how much people , especially men, spend looking at it. I think most men understand this themselves but don't want to totally admit it to themselves. And yes, we all KNOW these girls choose to be in porn. So what? These men with daughters, wives and gfs CHOOSE to watch.

 

 

By the way ADF, I answered your question incasey ou missed it since you failed to respond.

[sally4sara]

A thought came to me today. It is nothing I advocate people do, but just something I wanted to share.

 

Since the porn argument seems most commonly with women being some aspect of being against it and men most commonly for it....

And the argument being that porn use is normal, natural and masturbation is normal, natural.

 

Mrs. Smith and Mr. Smith are hanging around the house after dinner. Their son and daughter are horsing around getting ready to head off to bed. They are 12 and 14 - middle school aged.

Mrs. Smith goes into her bedroom to find Mr. Smith idly fondling himself to porn (of any kind you wish to imagine). She was thinking of getting frisky later and is a tish irritated that he seems to have started without her.

She says "I wish you'd put that time and energy into us more and a bit less into porn".

He says "Aww Mrs. Smith, I got more for you later. Its not about the porn but porn is a normal way to go about a natural urge. Don't make an issue out of something that isn't wrong and should be accepted".

So she sighs and figures there is some truth to what he says.

 

As she leaves the room she announces:

"Suzie! Timmy! Quit horsing around and get ready for bed. But stay out of our bedroom; your father is masturbating to porn and needs privacy."

 

Is it still something normal, natural, and acceptable?

[Jersey Shortie]

I'm not sure what your asking Sally. You would never annouce to your kids that you were about to have sex so they should stay out of the room anymore then you would annouce to the kids that they should stay out of the room because daddy was jerking off to porn girls.

 

I will say though that no man in this world, in his right mind, would want to see his daughter or wife or gf treated like women are treated in the sex industry. No doubt that these women choose to go into the industry. But that is no where near the men who are fathers, husbands, boyfriends, uncles that choose to support and enjoy the industry.

Edited May 17, 2010 by Jersey Shortie

[SarahRose]

Thank you for your story, it is nice to know that someone else gets it. Maybe that will fend off some of the guys who say that it doesn't affect anything.

 

Yes I think some get it but too afraid to speak out about it.

 

It is funny with all the porn that is available so many guys are still horrible in bed. Probably because the porn isn't about participating with a woman but rather using whatever random hole and body part to get off with.

 

The way guys talk about women these days it is like we are just body parts and holes to use and discard when something more attractive or different comes along.

 

Then there are the posts from those frail egos complaining that OMFG the girl they are dating actually had sex with someone else before them! The shock the horror!

 

I think guys are just knocking themselves out of the gene and relationship pool and will just end up with their hand in front of the computer being completely unable and unwilling to relate to a female as a person rather than just holes and body parts to screw.

[sally4sara]

I'm not sure what your asking Sally. You would never annouce to your kids that you were about to have sex so they should stay out of the room anymore then you would annouce to the kids that they should stay out of the room because daddy was jerking off to porn girls.

 

I will say though that no man in this world, in his right mind, would want to see his daughter or wife or gf treated like women are treated in the sex industry. No doubt that these women choose to go into the industry. But that is no where near the men who are fathers, husbands, boyfriends, uncles that choose to support and enjoy the industry.

 

That is why I said it wasn't advice.

 

Its all normal and natural right?

Instead of the kids, how about mom and dad in law pop by?

 

"Well this is a pleasant surprise Mr and Mrs. Smith Sr.! Smith Jr. will be out after he is done masturbating to porn. Have a seat while we wait....are you thirsty?"