befreckled Posted May 7, 2010 Share Posted May 7, 2010 Recently, I went on a date with a guy who is separated and on the cusp of finalising his divorce in a month's time. He has been dating other people prior to meeting me. We've literally gone on one date. A couple conversations to get to know each other but one actual date. We are in different countries right now and, I started flirting with him online and things got abit heavy. And the morning after, the questions started. "what are you looking for?" etc Expectedly, he wants someone to enjoy some time with and he isn't ready to jump into a relationship (which I think is more than fair and normal) I apologised to him for the mixed signals and made it very clear that I didn't want a FwB situation. At this point, I just want to date and, see where things go. By date, I mean no sex. I don't rule out making out, but definitely no sex. I mean, it's been one date but it's fully my fault that I gave him the wrong idea. The fact that he was the one that came to me and talked about it, should I feel encouraged? I don't need a boyfriend just to have one, I'd like to put labels when I'm pretty damn sure and I'm not in a rush. So, we are actually on the same page just worded differently. He doesn't rule out a relationship in the future but right now, doesn't want to jump into another relationship ASAP and I believe him..it isn't a line to get me to change my mind (I suspect that he was seeing someone seriously and she recently hurt him...like a couple months ago..so add that to the finalisation of the divorce, I guess that's where he is) Should I go on a second date with him or, do I run for the hills? Link to post Share on other sites
DGM Posted May 7, 2010 Share Posted May 7, 2010 If you feel you want to go on a second date, then do it. If you are not attracted to him and don't want to, then don't go. But, what are you afraid of? Getting hurt? Just take things slow. Approach the situation as though you are friends. Go out, have fun, don't put too much pressure on the date. Let nature take its course. Link to post Share on other sites
Author befreckled Posted May 7, 2010 Author Share Posted May 7, 2010 If you feel you want to go on a second date, then do it. If you are not attracted to him and don't want to, then don't go. But, what are you afraid of? Getting hurt? Just take things slow. Approach the situation as though you are friends. Go out, have fun, don't put too much pressure on the date. Let nature take its course. I am attracted to him..that might be the problem. I am physically very attracted to him. but I know that he isn't ready to jump into a relationship and neither am I. I'd like to take my time. I know that FwB isn't me at all so, it feels like I'm setting myself up for failure. I want a relationship with him potentially, but I can't say for sure until I see more of him. So it feels like a damn if I do and damn if I don't Link to post Share on other sites
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