How Stupid Does He Think I Am?

[mishy]

This is my other thread about him http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?t=230044

 

I got an email from him a couple of days ago saying that he can't see me for 3 weeks because he is "flat out' with learning this new managerial job he has just got.

 

Its funny because a lot of the time he sees me, he will say later that he cannot see me for "2 weeks" and i almost laughed when i got this email because its like he has upgraded it LOL

 

And the other funny thing is we only ever spend an hour and a half together , and its like who doesnt have a spare hour and a half within three weeks?

 

I mean honestly how stooopid does he think I am? He obviously has to find time for his other 3 or 4 women (who knows how many).

 

I didnt tell him that i am not sleeping with him again, i just didnt react to the email.

 

what do you guys reckon?

[Phateless]

If you've decided you're done with him then move on. No sense in wasting your time by pursuing the "burn."

[mishy]

yeah i see your point. I guess i was just seeing if other people think the reason for the three weeks is other women.

 

It just helps me in staying away from him

[WTRanger]

After reading your last threads, I bet this guy thinks you are really stupid. In fact, he's probably 100% confident in that. He know he could treat you worse than garbage, and you'd still sleep with him at his every beck and call.

 

Now that hopefully you've seen the light and finally figure out that's not the best way to live, be prepared for an onslaught of this from him. That email is just the start of a major offensive on his part. You have got to stay strong throughout all of this.

 

He's still living rent free in your head though. That's step one in evicting him from your life. You've got to get him out of there.

[Mary3]

Mishy pleaaaaaaasssse !

 

You are still hanging on to the guy who only thinks about you when his ____ is hard ( like another poster said ).

 

You are a source of sexual pleasure to him. And thats all. You are not the love of his life. You are not his bride to be. You are not his soul mate.

 

Because you lay down and have great sex does NOT make a relationship.

 

This is a sex relationship of sorts. He wants sex . He calls. If its one , two , or three weeks , thats when he calls.

 

My question is this : Who cares if you get a text or an email saying : Hey babe I can't see you for 3 weeks.

 

Translation : You are not important enough for me to come over and see you .spend time with you , take you to dinner, take you out and have a nice evening. You are only good enough to ****___..THATS what he is really saying .

 

So instead of you saying " Listen you A--wipe I was lost and confused when I met you and wanted things . I realized you didn't want the same thing that I did. You just wanted my Pu~na~nee ...so now that I have grown up a little I sure don't need you texting or emailing me for occasional sex. Get real LOSER !"

[deux ex machina]

Just think of how much of an arrogant f*cking arse he is, thinking he can has you on lock when SO DOES NOT. And he's got the nerve try to lower your expectations even more by saying three weeks contact, as opposed to the two weeks he set previously. That is totally unacceptable.

 

The only response he needs to hear from you is complete and utter, stone cold silence.

[Mary3]

Just think of how much of an arrogant f*cking arse he is, thinking he can has you on lock when SO DOES NOT. And he's got the nerve try to lower your expectations even more by saying three weeks contact, as opposed to the two weeks he set previously. That is totally unacceptable.

 

The only response he needs to hear from you is complete and utter, stone cold silence.

 

Just Beauuuutiiiful !!

[Fouts]

You are still hanging on to the guy who only thinks about you when his ____ is hard

 

Mary, isn't that normal male behavior?

[Mary3]

Mary, isn't that normal male behavior?

 

The Operative word is " only * ............

[mikarla]

Honestly Mishy, I've read through your threads and I feel for you as I've been in a fwb situation before where I started to develop feelings and it hurts, like hell.

 

However, you've had hundreds of replies telling you the same thing, and yet you are still wondering if it's other women that is causing the one week upgrade? It is completely irrelevant if it's other women or if he's busy or if he is just toying with you because at the end of the day he doesn't care about you, one bit.

 

No amount of support from here can make you break this guy out of your life, you need to find the strength within yourself to not settle for less. What has this guy given you in the 2+ years you've known him? A few orgasms? Fantastic. But the majority of what he's given you is tantamout to emotional abuse and your self esteem and sanity cannot handle the continual torture you're allowing yourself to be subject to.

 

People only use those that allow themselves to be used. You need to cease all contact with him and move on. Some people have also suggested you seek some counselling in order to help you through this, I think this is a good idea.

 

My heart feels for you and I'm sorry if the above comes across as harsh, but you need to hear how damaging you are being to yourself.

[mishy]

yeah im speechless pretty much at all your comments. I have been slowly seeing it for what it really is. He DOES think that he can say whatever, do whatever and i will still sleep with him, what a stupid idiot ive been.!!!!!

 

Stone cold silence, i like it

[Mary3]

yeah im speechless pretty much at all your comments. I have been slowly seeing it for what it really is. He DOES think that he can say whatever, do whatever and i will still sleep with him, what a stupid idiot ive been.!!!!!

 

Stone cold silence, i like it

 

I think a guy who finds a girl who will let him sex her at his convienance and (nothing more) will continue to do that to her until she says she's had enough.

 

Let me give you an example : Years ago I was in a casual type of situation with this guy. Then we didnt talk for 2 years. Then he called and asked if he could come over ?

 

I said " You know I have changed from the girl you used to know. I don't want to " hang out " = sex . I said when you are ready to ask me out on a REAL date give me a call....

 

He NEVER called again.

 

So proof to show if they can get the sex they will. Soon as you cut them off and be STRONG they will disappear ...

[mishy]

I told him one time that i didnt want to sleep with him anymore, and he said he still wanted to help me with some things related to my work.

 

But anyway, yeah i completely agree with you on that one.

 

I have just eben thinking about little crappy things he has done to me that not only showed he doesnt care about me, but doesnt even care about me as a human being.

 

I can think of two occasions that i have emailed or texted him telling i was really ill- (both quite serious illnesses) and mainly i told him because he was a nurse for a number of years. And NO reply. Not even a "hope you feel better soon"

 

I just cannot even get my head around that.

[Karla101]

I agree that there are some guys who will continue to "use" a girl until she puts a stop to it. Women who want casual sex and love it, and don't mind not having more, don't comment on it, or feel bad about it. They feel confident in their sexual nature and don't think twice about it. This relationship is taking up space in your head as the other person commented. When I spent time with men that were just blantent "users", I remembered and felt bad about for years afterwards. Just thinking about those few men, still brings about feelings of shame, and "why, why, why". For your own self esteem, since you want more, just end it. Remember that thing about...the universe cannot bring you something better, till you shut the door on this". Set up a boundary that says "i'm not just a booty call, girl", and stick to it, and the men in your life will start to treat you accordingly. Believe me, he will not be thinking twice about it. He will move on quickly and look for his next victim, where he can get something for nothing.

[Mary3]

I told him one time that i didnt want to sleep with him anymore, and he said he still wanted to help me with some things related to my work.

 

But anyway, yeah i completely agree with you on that one.

 

I have just eben thinking about little crappy things he has done to me that not only showed he doesnt care about me, but doesnt even care about me as a human being.

 

I can think of two occasions that i have emailed or texted him telling i was really ill- (both quite serious illnesses) and mainly i told him because he was a nurse for a number of years. And NO reply. Not even a "hope you feel better soon"

 

I just cannot even get my head around that.

 

 

There is a saying : A guy will ask 100 girls to sleep with him. He only needs one YES.

 

So you were the yes girl for him.

 

The thing with women is we form blind attachments to men we are sleeping with. Notice I said " blind " . He could be sleeping with 16 other women but until we OPEN our ears up to listen then we hear NOTHING.

 

That is why so many of your posts you are awestruck that THIS could be happening.

 

The guy is Loving it ! He loves pulling the wool over your eyes. He loves not caring if you have ANY illness or disease. He loves not taking you out and you not complaining about it. He Loves being able to control your body and your mind and come over and get sex , then leave !

 

TAKE BACK THE CONTROL !

 

After you wean yourself from him please get some counseling so you don't repeat the sleep stuff...

[deux ex machina]

...I have just eben thinking about little crappy things he has done to me that not only showed he doesnt care about me, but doesnt even care about me as a human being.

 

I can think of two occasions that i have emailed or texted him telling i was really ill- (both quite serious illnesses) and mainly i told him because he was a nurse for a number of years. And NO reply. Not even a "hope you feel better soon"

 

I just cannot even get my head around that.

 

When these memories of his ill-treatment come up, you may want to list them while they are still fresh in your mind on a piece of paper. Perhaps you can fold up the page (so it's not in your face all of the time), and put it near where you keep your phone (or wherever you are when temptation rears its ugly head). That way, if you have a moment of weakness, you can pull out the list and see how pointless any sort of contact would be.

 

He will only bring you tears, mishy. This man is toxic to you.