dario Posted January 23, 2004 Share Posted January 23, 2004 I drink too much. After a failed r/s I am back to drinking to cope with work. I almost lost my job for keeping my issues bottled up. My supervisor pulled me aside. He helped me out and now I'm under the sort of 'you've got to come around to being what you once were' shot. My mum has informed me that she doesn't want to know me. I spoke to her about staying in a spare room at hers for two weeks until a find a cheaper place...I was actually going to go overseas for a bit. She thinks I'm mad. Ever since my dad died she doesn't quite get me as during this period I distanced myself from her to cope in my own way. It was tough. Now Vodka has come back into my life in a big way. Link to post Share on other sites
BrainRightHW Posted January 23, 2004 Share Posted January 23, 2004 Dario, i don't think you have a permanent drink problem, i too have been drinking far more than usual due to similiar circumstances to yours... if you think you can't handle it then get yourself some help like councelling or talk to somebody that can understand your circmstances there is a danger of progressing towards alcohism and you don't want to go there try and get yourself into something healthy regarding sports or do a therapeutic course or whatever, this is what i plan to do... good luck dude! pss if you can get off the vodka onto something lighter this won't be as bad Link to post Share on other sites
Arabess Posted January 23, 2004 Share Posted January 23, 2004 I used to drink a great deal....then decided out of nowhere to quit for a couple of years. Now, I only drink beer. I make jokes about it.....but drink VERY LITTLE compared to how I used to. I think it's important to focus on WHY you drink....and to realize it's not worth numbing pain or disappointment at the risk of losing the portions of your life which HAVE turned out for you in a positive way....like your job. Drinking to extreme is a slow suicide. It also hurts everyone else you care about and who care about you. If you can't quit on your own....join an AA group or see a physician for help. It's just now worth losing your life into a bottle. Link to post Share on other sites
Arabess Posted January 23, 2004 Share Posted January 23, 2004 I meant.... It's just NOT worth losing your life into a bottle. ....someone pointed this out to me in email....and it was too late to edit. Sorry..... Link to post Share on other sites
brashgal Posted January 23, 2004 Share Posted January 23, 2004 What was the name of that Nicolas Cage movie where he drinks himself to death? I don't think I drank for a month after I saw that movie. You might want to rent it. I hope you'll stop drinking. I wish you strength. You have acknowledged you have a problem, you are most of the way there. Go to an AA meeting. Godspeed. Link to post Share on other sites
BrainRightHW Posted January 23, 2004 Share Posted January 23, 2004 hold on he isn't at the stage of AA yet... well at least how we view it here in Ireland AA here is for chronic alcolholics, just because a person temporarily decides to drink for x amount of time to help him get over a traumatic period ( i know it isn't the solution but a temporary one ) doesn't make them an alcoholic i plan in a few months like i usually do to stop for a month... none at all, when i am doing that i don't even want to start again! don't make Dario paranoid, you are most likely not an alcoholic AA is for serious cases, not for someone who decides to go on the piss for a while!!!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
dyermaker Posted January 23, 2004 Share Posted January 23, 2004 As far as I know, AA is for Alcoholics, and people affected by Alcoholics. An alcoholic doesn't even really have to drink, alcoholism is about so much more. Link to post Share on other sites
Author dario Posted January 23, 2004 Author Share Posted January 23, 2004 Thankyou for all your help. I do drink a bit...or, when I'm out...I take it far too overboard. I don't know if it's overboard. I don't know. When I meet with problems...vodka seems the best way out. It becomes a weekend of diving into it. And before I know it...the wekend is over with and it's back to work. My ex was going to AA...and, I know this sounds stupid, but even thinking about going there reminds me of her. I don't know. Link to post Share on other sites
BrainRightHeartWrong Posted January 23, 2004 Share Posted January 23, 2004 Jesus, if that were the attitude here in Ireland 1/2 the population would be going to AA its all in the criteria of what defines an alcoholic personally Dario if you were in Ireland that would be nearly normal unless it caused you problems real problems!!! cultural difference? Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted January 23, 2004 Share Posted January 23, 2004 Actually, BRHW, I recently posted an article which posited that all of England has an alcohol problem now. I imagine it's the same for the rest of GB. There is nothing wrong with saying one is an alcoholic - or in getting help for it. Your personal definition of what constitutes a 'serious case' is, I suspect, quite different from the medical definition of what constitutes one. Dario, by all means get help. You are trying to kill pain and alcohol only works to do that for a while. It numbs you, but when the numbing is gone, the reasons for the pain are still there. There are much more constructive ways to heal pain - with the bonus that you don't kill off so many brain cells or hurt other vital organs. Link to post Share on other sites
Author dario Posted January 25, 2004 Author Share Posted January 25, 2004 Here in Australia we have a 24 hour life line....I don't know if you have the same in the States/GB etc (you probably do?) At first I thought they would just palm me off....but they don't. They listen. I mentioned all my problems and found out that there was much to 'go on' for. She (the operator) was extremely supportive and didn't mind at all....a whole hour on the phone. I've never really done this stuff before. But it helps. It puts things in perspective. We had/have our long weekend at the moment in Aus. I've been drinking non-stop....just downing the stuff. I had actually had an inspection of my place yesterday and it was so weird and surreal and people (up to 15) walked through my place and there was I, weary eyed, thinking, 'What the f*ck is happening?' I have alot of work to do. Counselling was a desperate attempt...and it works, I guess. Just have to pick myself up from here on in. Ciao Link to post Share on other sites
brashgal Posted January 25, 2004 Share Posted January 25, 2004 Hang in there honey, you can do it! Link to post Share on other sites
Author dario Posted January 25, 2004 Author Share Posted January 25, 2004 Oh...and with alcoholism....I am at a stage where a flask sits under the dash of my car. There's always a swig at the lights. There's beer at work, there's vodka at the local bar at lunch.....it's not healthy. As, in all reality, I don't eat much. I don't know what constitutes an alcoholic...or what level one must be at the get that tag. All I know is that drinking ups a scale during times like these. And I shouldn't resort to such means. My proximity is such that I go for the hair of the dog all the time...I live just across the street from a pub. And I know it's wrong, but I order up and just sit at a poker machine and let time pass. This is a big problem and I will counter it this year. I think, regardless of the levels of drinking, I have to make sure that when problems hit I have to find another way of dealing with them. And I will. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted January 25, 2004 Share Posted January 25, 2004 If nothing else, do it for the sake of your body. When the grief is past, you'll want to live a happy, healthy life and that will be difficult if your body is damaged. Please PLEASE quit drinking and driving! Link to post Share on other sites
amerikajin Posted January 25, 2004 Share Posted January 25, 2004 Whether a physician would clinically define you as an "alcoholic" or not isn't important. Your drinking is obviously interfering with your ability to function from day to day. It's affecting your relationships with your boss and your own family, so it's clear you've got no choice but to stop. Dyer, who continues to show his wisdom beyond his years, is right: alcoholism isn't just the propensity to lock lips around the opening of a bottle. Substance abuse is usually a sign of depression or emotional upset which needs to be evaluated and treated by licensed mental health professionals. Before joining a support group like AA, I'd first visit an internist or a psychiatrist. An evaluation will determine what kind of care you need and whether or not you need treatment in a rehab center. Link to post Share on other sites
Clancy Posted January 25, 2004 Share Posted January 25, 2004 If you want to know if you are an alcoholic who wants to be helped you simply need to answer this question: Have I reached the point where I feel powerless to control my drinking? If a scrupulously honest appraisal of your condition leads you to answer yes, I feel powerless to control my drinking, then you are an alcoholic. Link to post Share on other sites
Author dario Posted January 26, 2004 Author Share Posted January 26, 2004 I am powerless. But I will do it this alone....It's still into the long weekend i\here in Aus. I've tried to call mates and their all busy with family. I was so tempted to even call 'her' to talk to. But I'm okay. If alone is how it will be...then alone it shall be. And I will choose my path well...and I will get through it all. Link to post Share on other sites
will_woman Posted January 27, 2004 Share Posted January 27, 2004 i agree that drinking will make one to forget the troubles. i started drinking much a few months back. A week ago, i tried to stablize my right hand but it just shakes uncontrollably. Has it got to do with alcohol? I know drinking too much is bad....but i need that to get to sleep.....that's a few week ago. Sports is another area for me. Link to post Share on other sites
amerikajin Posted January 27, 2004 Share Posted January 27, 2004 Alcohol is a temporary escape. You're just closing your eyes on your trouble if you drink yourself to numbness, but you eventually have to wake up, and when you do, your troubles will be right there staring you in the face. Get help from a professional. You're not insane, but you need a suitable outlet to release what's inside you, or you at least need to meet someone who can help you do that on your own. The bottle will kill you. Put it away. Link to post Share on other sites
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