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Will I have a life of no friends?


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jean-luc sisko

I don't hang out much with people, and I think it's because I don't understand human interaction and colloquial norms much.

 

I think also that my intuition is below the norm. Does this mean I will be without friends for all of my life? What can I do to be at the normal intuitive level?

 

human interaction is too complex for me to understand. Do i have autism? People would say "well you should be nice to everybody" and then say something bad about somebody or say "everything is relative and people have different likes and dislikes" and then lambaste somebody for having a different opinion.

 

Also, most people form an immediate opinion of others, and choose to like/dislike them at that moment. I do not. Am I perceptually stunted?

 

What can I do to be on the normal mental keel?

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jean-luc sisko

Another thing is that I am not able to hold conversations, and most people do innately. Why didn't I gain these skills in childhood, as everybody else did? :confused: Most psychological texts say that they are gained in childhood.

 

My aims in life are not so complex. They are:

 

- To be in the top management of a company

- To date a woman of Indian (from Asia) descent (well I live in a country that has a large Indian-descent population)

- To save money and travel

 

How can I achieve these goals? :confused:

 

In a sense, I couldn't care less about friends. If it means a life of lonerdom, so be it. I know my autism keeps me back.

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Only you can figure out how to achieve your goals, READ BOOKS, TALK TO PEOPLE WHO HAVE HAD SUCESS IN THE AREA YOU WANT... ect. ITS UP TO YOU!

 

You seem a little lonely, I can relate and so can pretty much every one else. We all get that way some times. I'll be your friend! I'm sure a lot of people where you live would also agree to be your friend if you asked them to be.

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jean-luc sisko
Only you can figure out how to achieve your goals, READ BOOKS, TALK TO PEOPLE WHO HAVE HAD SUCESS IN THE AREA YOU WANT... ect. ITS UP TO YOU!

 

You seem a little lonely, I can relate and so can pretty much every one else. We all get that way some times. I'll be your friend! I'm sure a lot of people where you live would also agree to be your friend if you asked them to be.

 

i'm not lonely, just being contemplative. I think i spend my entire life as a loner, but if so, then so be it. :)

 

and thanks for your kind words too. :)

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jean-luc sisko
go skydiving you will meet dozens of great people

 

i don't understand interaction, so i'm not sure.

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human interaction is too complex for me to understand. Do i have autism?

 

No, but you watch Star Trek too much.

 

Dude, you don't have autism- an autistic person wouldn't even wonder about this kind of stuff, because they'd be incapable of doing so...

 

Socially awkward, maybe.

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jean-luc sisko
No, but you watch Star Trek too much.

 

Dude, you don't have autism- an autistic person wouldn't even wonder about this kind of stuff, because they'd be incapable of doing so...

 

Socially awkward, maybe.

 

hmm.... i'm not sure. I think i have autism, if i do, then such is life. nobody is perfect.

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hmm.... i'm not sure. I think i have autism, if i do, then such is life. nobody is perfect.

 

Why do you think that?

I don't think that at all.

You're too insightful.

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Hi jean-luc.

You could ask your doctor to evaluate for Asperger's Syndrome. If you watched the show 'Boston Legal', one of the lawyer characters suffered from Asperger's. Which is to say that, even with this condition, individuals can be highly successful and fulfill their life goals.

 

One website states that, "The issues that emerge for people diagnosed with Aspergers are related specifically to social and communication skills."

The Mayo Clinic website also is a good online health care resource but I recommend that you get a professional assessment through your physician.

 

Very best of luck.

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jean-luc sisko
Why do you think that?

I don't think that at all.

You're too insightful.

 

because i don't understand people and how to interact in groups.

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reservoirdog1
go skydiving you will meet dozens of great people

Dude, from your handle, I get the feeling that's your solution to a lot of things. :)

 

Having said that... did it myself last summer for the first time. HOLY SHYT. :cool:

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jean-luc sisko
Hi jean-luc.

You could ask your doctor to evaluate for Asperger's Syndrome. If you watched the show 'Boston Legal', one of the lawyer characters suffered from Asperger's. Which is to say that, even with this condition, individuals can be highly successful and fulfill their life goals.

 

One website states that, "The issues that emerge for people diagnosed with Aspergers are related specifically to social and communication skills."

The Mayo Clinic website also is a good online health care resource but I recommend that you get a professional assessment through your physician.

 

Very best of luck.

 

what are the symptoms of Asberger's syndrome?

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Not the love ace
go skydiving you will meet dozens of great people

 

That's probably you're answering for everything, right? Hehe. Kidding but you're right on that, sky diving makes you feel like you're alive. The closest I have done to sky diving is bugee jumping.

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jean-luc sisko
Why do you think that?

I don't think that at all.

You're too insightful.

 

i want the same complexity of understanding of human interaction that everybody else has.

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what are the symptoms of Asberger's syndrome?

jean-luc,

Most important would be to request an evaluation through a properly trained and licensed medical professional.

 

In the meantime, you could do some research online. The Mayo Clinic site and Wikipedia, for example. There are also sites dedicated to educating about, and supporting those with, Asperger's. Here's a book recommendation that was given in a different thread:

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showpost.php?p=2310167&postcount=37.

 

But, please keep in mind that it's not in your best interest to diagnose from any book, online source (no matter how reputable it's deemed to be), or from some list of common symptoms. Do also consult with a real, live medical doctor.

Edited by Ronni_W
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jean-luc sisko

I want to be at the normal mental level. there is no reason why I cannot be.

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Your social behavior based on your parents as a model.

Perhaps one of your parents was this way. It is behavior that can be learned.

But, it is very difficult to change yourself. My advice is to read books on NLP and emotional intellegence.

Why do look for an Indian girl unless you are an Indian? Indian girls get married almost only in an arranged marriage which means it is made by their parents with consideration of many things including a subgroup of religion, bood group and many other things. Of course, a girl is a virgin before the marriage.

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jean-luc sisko
Your social behavior based on your parents as a model.

Perhaps one of your parents was this way. It is behavior that can be learned.

But, it is very difficult to change yourself. My advice is to read books on NLP and emotional intellegence.

 

Because everybody has the normal knowledge by default and I do not.

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You'reasian
I don't hang out much with people, and I think it's because I don't understand human interaction and colloquial norms much.

 

I think also that my intuition is below the norm. Does this mean I will be without friends for all of my life? What can I do to be at the normal intuitive level?

 

human interaction is too complex for me to understand. Do i have autism? People would say "well you should be nice to everybody" and then say something bad about somebody or say "everything is relative and people have different likes and dislikes" and then lambaste somebody for having a different opinion.

 

Also, most people form an immediate opinion of others, and choose to like/dislike them at that moment. I do not. Am I perceptually stunted?

 

What can I do to be on the normal mental keel?

 

 

Human interaction can be understood at a simple level:

 

People's behaviors are influenced by pleasure and pain. In order to influence others, people use incentives to influence other's behaviors....connect the dots.

 

When spoken word and action oppose each other, it is called a contradiction. Some people use contradictions to either hide one of the individual behaviors or use the entire contradiction to hedge their position. For full treatment on the topic read on Mao Tse Tung or Machiavelli.

 

Lastly, people believe that perception is reality. This is why first impressions last.

 

 

....even I can understand that.....lol

Edited by You'reasian
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jean-luc sisko
Your social behavior based on your parents as a model.

Perhaps one of your parents was this way. It is behavior that can be learned.

But, it is very difficult to change yourself. My advice is to read books on NLP and emotional intellegence.

Why do look for an Indian girl unless you are an Indian? Indian girls get married almost only in an arranged marriage which means it is made by their parents with consideration of many things including a subgroup of religion, bood group and many other things. Of course, a girl is a virgin before the marriage.

 

is that your business?

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