How many here have NEVER met their LD bf/gf ?

[Mary3]

Be careful .

 

If all his pics he looks like a model , beware.

 

If he professed LOVE really fast and his letters were mushy on the second letter and beyond , watch out.

 

Does he have any tragedys where he has asked you for any money ?

 

Are you shipping anything for him ?

 

Does every letter tell you how wonderful you are and how he can't wait to meet you but never does ?

 

Have you seen him on web cam ?

 

Does he CALL you regularly ?

 

Alot of SCAMMERS out there ladies and gents ?

 

What do you REALLY know about your new love except for all the Mushy letters he sends ?

 

Guy on MSNBC was courting MANY women and taking them for thousands of dollars.

 

Hard to swallow. ...

 

Just be careful . MEET this person in public.

 

He or She should NEVER ever ask you for MONEY !

[Spiritofnow]

I am lucky enough not to be one of those people you mention above who have been conned, but I am sure they do exist and do cause damage to people. I think your warning is a valid point to make and should be considered in a balanced way.

[Mary3]

I am lucky enough not to be one of those people you mention above who have been conned, but I am sure they do exist and do cause damage to people. I think your warning is a valid point to make and should be considered in a balanced way.

 

If any reader here see's my post and some of the things that they had not thought of pop up again and again ...then hopefully they can write here and ask anything they need to , in case they are being scammed.

 

Another thing. People here who are in love with this person will not want to try and investigate without hard evidence if this person they are talking to is a possible scammer.

 

They are smooth. They are exceptional at getting the lonely person to fall deep for them. It depends on how badly you want to believe someone who has never met you can be so deeply in love.

 

When in REALITY , Love is 8 steps away in a relationship. Its not the first thing you should feel . MANY things need to happen and to survive fights and disagreements only then can you surface through to real love.

 

So those who type all day on the computer are NOT realistic in a reality sense meaning they have not spent TIME , REAL Quality time , with this person.

 

There are wonderful LDRS going on here and likely Scam LDR"s as well.

 

If you think some of these situations above exist please post.

 

We need to stop the scammers from hurting anymore innocent men and women.

[madjac74]

I met a girl on an online dating site a long while back. We basically were just in the email phase and the emails made me smile and she really seemed too good to be true. Eventually her emails started telling me a story about how her mom was married to an african man and she was their visitin and her mom was really sick. Eventually she started asking for money to help with her moms surgery. I guess I was scammed but not too much damage since it was just emails. But I kinda felt sick that someone would use your feelings and prey on the possibility of love just to get some money.

 

I met my current girlfriend on a dating site too but we went from emails to text to actually meeting so I know she is the real deal;)

[Mary3]

I met a girl on an online dating site a long while back. We basically were just in the email phase and the emails made me smile and she really seemed too good to be true. Eventually her emails started telling me a story about how her mom was married to an african man and she was their visitin and her mom was really sick. Eventually she started asking for money to help with her moms surgery. I guess I was scammed but not too much damage since it was just emails. But I kinda felt sick that someone would use your feelings and prey on the possibility of love just to get some money.

 

I met my current girlfriend on a dating site too but we went from emails to text to actually meeting so I know she is the real deal;)

 

Very glad you made it through that one..

[Mary3]

I met my bf online via another online friend. We hit it off as friends immediately. I visited twice, both times just as friends. Between the 2nd and 3rd visit is when our relationship bloomed, and we consummated it the 3rd time. We have visited numerous times since then, in fact he is with me now, and will be for the next 3 weeks.

 

But I totally agree about these scams!! I hear them a lot when it comes to Asian countries, particularly the Philippines. I worked with an elderly man who is head over heels in love with this Filipino girl he met online. He actually made me sick the way he talked about how all (he specifically said ALL) Asian women are helpless and basically needing an American man to save them from the evils of Asian men.

 

I told him that I grew up with Korean women, was raised by a Korean woman, and never knew any to be the way he described.

 

But anyway, yeah, basically he was making plans to go to Asia and marry her, or something. I thought it all sounded fishy.

 

Yep. My ex bf's dad got hung up on this Phillapino girl. He showed me the picture ,. She was really pretty . ( too bad it was a fake pic ) She also asked for $ 1,500 and he sent it to her. She dissappeared after that ...

[aqualily6]

I dated my LD boyfriend for 3 years online and on the phone. We met in person and I moved to Florida 2 years ago. Our 5th anniversary was 2 days ago. We have our share of fights as all couples do. But we are still holding on and still working so far. Sorry to hear about those in which is doesn't work out for. LD relationships have a negative stereotype. But yes they do work. I know personally.

[Mary3]

I dated my LD boyfriend for 3 years online and on the phone. We met in person and I moved to Florida 2 years ago. Our 5th anniversary was 2 days ago. We have our share of fights as all couples do. But we are still holding on and still working so far. Sorry to hear about those in which is doesn't work out for. LD relationships have a negative stereotype. But yes they do work. I know personally.

 

I am glad you story had a very happy ending

[Sifu PT]

She also asked for $ 1,500 and he sent it to her. She dissappeared after that ...

 

not to be mean but "OUCHHHH" maybe thats why u made this to help deter these scammers.

 

ive been in a LDR for pretty long now and i can say she isnt a scammers. i have not ask her for any money or gifts from her. if she wants to give it to me i will be happily to accept as her love to me.

 

thank you Mary3 for the heads up.

[Citizen Erased]

I'd have to say if they ask you for money it's a given you're about to be ripped off. I would do anything for my bf but if he'd asked that of me before we'd even met I would have known what I was being used for.

[Mary3]

I'd have to say if they ask you for money it's a given you're about to be ripped off. I would do anything for my bf but if he'd asked that of me before we'd even met I would have known what I was being used for.

 

Right On CE ..........

[Mary3]

not to be mean but "OUCHHHH" maybe thats why u made this to help deter these scammers.

 

ive been in a LDR for pretty long now and i can say she isnt a scammers. i have not ask her for any money or gifts from her. if she wants to give it to me i will be happily to accept as her love to me.

 

thank you Mary3 for the heads up.

 

How long have you been in your LDR ? Have you both met yet ? Good job for keeping an eye out for outgoing money flow ....!

[Adunaphel]

Mary3, your thread is very interesting and I cannot wait to read the stories other users might post.

I once developed an online romantic friendship with a guy who, as I found out later, had an habit of playing the "I am very interested in you" part just to get naked or sexual pictures to share with his friends.

Two female friends of mine sent naked pictures or had webcam sex with their online LDR boyfriends whom they hadn't met yet and are quite sure that such material is now online.

I think it still counts as scam even if money is not directly involved.

[FitChick]

You'd think it would be common sense not to give money to someone you'd never even met. Yes, if you are dating them and he or she is in dire straits, then I think it might be appropriate in some circumstances.

[Mary3]

You'd think it would be common sense not to give money to someone you'd never even met. Yes, if you are dating them and he or she is in dire straits, then I think it might be appropriate in some circumstances.

 

There is a difference between your real online boyfriend that you have some evidence its a real person , web cam , skype ( not sure how that works ) pictures he took with dates on them or newspapers.

 

Then you have a professional scammer who preys on someone lonely , someone that has a HARD time finding love , and here this person professes deep love very fast and this person is in awe. If the PS is really smooth they get you to fall fast and hard.

 

AFTER you fall and the word again is AFTER you fall deeply for them the scammer says his daughter is in the hospital or HE is in the hospital and you need to send money immediately for surgery . They have one hundred stories of catastrphe but the only real LOSS is your wallet and its contents...

 

The fact is NEVER send money. Now if you have met this person , you do fall deeply in love and for some terrible reason they ask for emergency money then it is up to you to determine if this is just a smooth talker vs a genuine need vs a real scammer.

[aerogurl87]

Luckily I've never been scammed like this although I've met two of my boyfriends online. The first was my ex who I didn't completely trust, although I was quite fond of him (found out later I should've went with my intuition but whatever). Then I met my current boyfriend. I did all the wrong things with him, like sending him a $80 gift for valentine's day before meeting, coming to see him first (most of my friends were against that), but we'd talked on skype and texted so much that I trusted him. Plus, he never asked me for money and actually tried to stop me from sending him the gift, but I couldn't help myself.

[Mary3]

Luckily I've never been scammed like this although I've met two of my boyfriends online. The first was my ex who I didn't completely trust, although I was quite fond of him (found out later I should've went with my intuition but whatever). Then I met my current boyfriend. I did all the wrong things with him, like sending him a $80 gift for valentine's day before meeting, coming to see him first (most of my friends were against that), but we'd talked on skype and texted so much that I trusted him. Plus, he never asked me for money and actually tried to stop me from sending him the gift, but I couldn't help myself.

 

We always trust our instincts. Thats why we are born with them I am glad you did. A few bumps and hurdles we make when dating ...

 

The 2nd bf sounds like a keeper

[Shakz]

What about those who scam just for the sake of scamming? Lying about their looks, their job, their lifestyle, for no apparent reason other than to make themselves seem more attractive. To what end I can't imagine. I once spent alot of time online with a woman who claimed to be a history professor at Brown. Some of the things she said didn't add up so I checked with the school and they never heard of her. I questioned her about it and she got pissed! People are just strange sometimes.

[Mary3]

What about those who scam just for the sake of scamming? Lying about their looks, their job, their lifestyle, for no apparent reason other than to make themselves seem more attractive. To what end I can't imagine. I once spent alot of time online with a woman who claimed to be a history professor at Brown. Some of the things she said didn't add up so I checked with the school and they never heard of her. I questioned her about it and she got pissed! People are just strange sometimes.

 

Its BECAUSE : what if she said she was a married 4 times , a waitress with herpes simplex virus ? No, she's not going to admit any of that...

 

Just like the girl that weighs 375 lbs and tells you she was 125 lbs. As long as she can delay the meeting and YOU think you are talking to a hot 125 lb girl she will keep it up !

 

WHY : Because in real life there aren't as many men attracted to 375 lb women . ( To be fair - there are those men are ARE attracted to large women - but they mostly advertise on the BBW site for that )

 

So for the married men who lie and say they are single , the big 500 lb greasy guy with grey hair , the unemployed 45 year old man living with mom -

 

( no offense to the Unemployed Worker as many of us are but to lie about where you live...come on ..)

 

So there are hundreds of lies and reasons to do so....

 

The girl you liked probrobly thought you would be impressed if she said was from Brown . Who knows what people think . ALot of men put $ 150,000 a year on their profile and bet they get swarms of gold diggers chasing their profile when in fact they work at Burger King for $ 6.00 an hour .

[Shakz]

Mary, I guess that's why I said "to what end?" Does someone who puts up lies think they won't be eventually discovered? I guess they don't really care. It's like a fantasy game. Anyway, thanks. I hadn't considered to what lengths loneliness will drive some people. I was thinking "a scam is a scam" but now I can see there is a difference.

[Mary3]

Mary, I guess that's why I said "to what end?" Does someone who puts up lies think they won't be eventually discovered? I guess they don't really care. It's like a fantasy game. Anyway, thanks. I hadn't considered to what lengths loneliness will drive some people. I was thinking "a scam is a scam" but now I can see there is a difference.

 

Well you have 2 kind of internet liars . One never intend to meet you for many obvious reasons , marriage , obesity , ect.

 

Then you have the other liars which try to extort money out of you. They have no intention of meeting you either but they do intend to remove some money from you thinking you are guilible and lonely.

[Mary3]

Okay 839 people viewed this and nobody has had a bad experience as far as scammers go. Thats good !

 

Unless someone here wants to talk about any funny things going on with their LD they have never met...

 

I will keep spreading the word

[Els]

Not to me, but I've read horror stories on BDSM forums that I used to visit.

[aerogurl87]

Not to me, but I've read horror stories on BDSM forums that I used to visit.

 

So have I, like the one where the one guy showed up only to have his prospective Domme's ex boyfriend come bursting in the house and wielding a loaded gun. Ironically enough that's how I met my boyfriend, on a BDSM site. No horror stories for us though, luckily.

[Mary3]

Not to me, but I've read horror stories on BDSM forums that I used to visit.

 

Is it as bad the BBW site or the Bi Sexual Playground site ?