Els Posted June 8, 2010 Share Posted June 8, 2010 So have I, like the one where the one guy showed up only to have his prospective Domme's ex boyfriend come bursting in the house and wielding a loaded gun. Ironically enough that's how I met my boyfriend, on a BDSM site. No horror stories for us though, luckily. Wow! That's interesting! I was tempted to arrange meets to satisfy my cravings a couple of times initially, but fortunately I got turned off by the fact that most of the male 'Doms' on the site that I was on were just... creepy and issue-ridden, for the most part. Glad you happened to snag one of the rare few that wasn't! Kinky people. I have wanted to explore BDSM but I don't think my SO is into it other than possibly some very lite stuff. Ever asked? Mine hadn't given it very much thought before either (probably because the only girl he'd ever been in an R with had been extremely averse to the slightest hint of unvanillaness in sex) but now he does Shibari and spankings like a longterm pro. Is it as bad the BBW site or the Bi Sexual Playground site ? Never been to those Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted June 9, 2010 Share Posted June 9, 2010 If bondage is also your thing, you could just take turns tying each other up occasionally at first, and then having sex while tied... you still get some feeling of control, but he doesn't need to be overly assertive, and vice versa. Granted, in your situation, the partner dominating probably wouldn't get as much out of it as the partner being dominated, but I'm sure they'll still have fun and it'll be nice variety. Who knows, it may lead to other things. My bf has discovered that he likes both dominating and being dominated... so while I'm pretty much sub/bottom all the way, once in a while I dominate him lightly instead. I still find it fun, even if it doesn't do that much for me sexually, and he loves the change. Link to post Share on other sites
impz Posted June 9, 2010 Share Posted June 9, 2010 Well, for my case, I met my wife online (who is a Filipino, scammer!), but she stays in the United States while I stay 14,000 miles away. I do come from a decent middle class family, but you know what? I feel like the scammer -_-. I usually buy her some jewelery or necessities that are not particularly expensive, but she buys me stuff like a ps3 during my birthday (and then complains I don't spend enough time with her and threatens to smash the ps3 once we stay together, joking of course...i think?). She doesn't earn too much too, but she is very generous when it comes to family and dear ones. A very fine lady indeed ^^. I think the issue of scamming comes when the other party shows little interest in meeting or spend time everyday as a commitment to chat. I mean, wasting all that time everyday to scam one person? I bet they are doing it to a few others at the same time. Link to post Share on other sites
aerogurl87 Posted June 9, 2010 Share Posted June 9, 2010 If bondage is also your thing, you could just take turns tying each other up occasionally at first, and then having sex while tied... you still get some feeling of control, but he doesn't need to be overly assertive, and vice versa. Granted, in your situation, the partner dominating probably wouldn't get as much out of it as the partner being dominated, but I'm sure they'll still have fun and it'll be nice variety. Who knows, it may lead to other things. My bf has discovered that he likes both dominating and being dominated... so while I'm pretty much sub/bottom all the way, once in a while I dominate him lightly instead. I still find it fun, even if it doesn't do that much for me sexually, and he loves the change. Lol, not meaning to thread jack, but my boyfriend and I are the opposite. I'm the Dominant one for the most part and he's the sub. I won't go into details but our sex life is pretty great. Sometimes we switch since he is a bit of a switch at times (and I like being dominated sometimes) but it doesn't come easy. Lots of playful fighting before he can catch me, haha. But anyway, yeah there are lots of crazies on those sites. I ran into a few before I started talking to my boyfriend, like the guy who wanted to build a shrine to me *cringe* And that's when I'd just hit the delete and ignore buttons and keep it moving. But I think there are more women on those sites out to scam people. Like the ones demanding a "tribute" and such without even meeting or in the first email. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted June 9, 2010 Share Posted June 9, 2010 Lol, not meaning to thread jack, but my boyfriend and I are the opposite. I'm the Dominant one for the most part and he's the sub. I won't go into details but our sex life is pretty great. Sometimes we switch since he is a bit of a switch at times (and I like being dominated sometimes) but it doesn't come easy. Lots of playful fighting before he can catch me, haha. But anyway, yeah there are lots of crazies on those sites. I ran into a few before I started talking to my boyfriend, like the guy who wanted to build a shrine to me *cringe* And that's when I'd just hit the delete and ignore buttons and keep it moving. But I think there are more women on those sites out to scam people. Like the ones demanding a "tribute" and such without even meeting or in the first email. It's probably the 'Dominants' on such sites doing the scamming the majority of the time, regardless of gender. As that position is one that requires a lot of trust and vulnerability on the other person's part, it is far too easily abused by online scammers. Link to post Share on other sites
Spiritofnow Posted June 9, 2010 Share Posted June 9, 2010 How in the heck did I come to read this thread and find the few last posts referring to bondage??? Talk about deviating. Ha ha ha ha ha. I will not be adding anything : ) Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mary3 Posted June 9, 2010 Author Share Posted June 9, 2010 If bondage is also your thing, you could just take turns tying each other up occasionally at first, and then having sex while tied... you still get some feeling of control, but he doesn't need to be overly assertive, and vice versa. Granted, in your situation, the partner dominating probably wouldn't get as much out of it as the partner being dominated, but I'm sure they'll still have fun and it'll be nice variety. Who knows, it may lead to other things. My bf has discovered that he likes both dominating and being dominated... so while I'm pretty much sub/bottom all the way, once in a while I dominate him lightly instead. I still find it fun, even if it doesn't do that much for me sexually, and he loves the change. Does your bf like it when you give him the Strap On ? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mary3 Posted June 9, 2010 Author Share Posted June 9, 2010 Mary, so sorry about the thread jacking!!! So last night I got into talking with bf about our vanilla-ish sex life. He expressed some fantasies he has had about him being tied up and me dominating him. There is also a particular article of clothing that I like to wear that I knew he liked but did not realize the extent of it. Apparently quite a few of his fantasies have me wearing it. Not that it bothers me at all, but I am curious as to what point does something like that become a fetish? I actually wouldn't mind being more dominating, but I am so self conscious! I realize you have to have some pretty good self esteem to be the one dominating. I am always fretting about my figure, even after SO tells me I am beautiful. If I can get over my self image I feel like I could dominate the hell out of him. I don't mean to imply that all Filipinos are scammers, but I think in recent years the number of female scam artists have been from the Philippines (or so it seems). The majority of stories I have heard are from that region. But they can come from all areas... I just remembered a story. Back when I use to help moderate a large manga forum a new poster from England joined. The majority of our users were from the States or Asia. She started by posting provocative pics of herself in the picture thread, but went on to cybersexing with posters. Being the moderator several members PMed me the conversations, as well as screen shots of some of the things she was doing on webcam (which were incredibly raunchy). She swore she was a virgin, wanted every other poster to be the one to deflower her, but needed the funds to go to Kentucky, Sri Lanka, wherever. Moral of the story: LDR scammers can be found anywhere, be it from the Philippines, on a BDSM site, or even a website devoted to comic books and nerds! Yea ...you guys totally took this thread , lol ! Its okay. I am guilty of it from time to time...It's not always intentional.. I have a weird one for you. This lady was advertising a room/job and said she was scantily clad....I told her I didn't care about that and then she said I need to IM her. I did and she said I needed to pay $ 5 ( for WHAT I don't know ) but I told her I was NOT paying for anything....She got pissed after that...never heard from her again... ( The job/room thing was you would live in a room and help her clean house while she was half naked ) Okay so I have seen * Scantily- Clad- I -hope- you- don't- mind- Ads " In other cities. The rooms are cheap but you have to put up with naked people , lol ! This was a long time ago. But lately looking at CL I see the low clothes roomates ads again..., lol.. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted June 9, 2010 Share Posted June 9, 2010 How in the heck did I come to read this thread and find the few last posts referring to bondage??? Talk about deviating. Ha ha ha ha ha. I will not be adding anything : ) I will try not to either!! ^^; Mary, so sorry about the thread jacking!!! So last night I got into talking with bf about our vanilla-ish sex life. He expressed some fantasies he has had about him being tied up and me dominating him. There is also a particular article of clothing that I like to wear that I knew he liked but did not realize the extent of it. Apparently quite a few of his fantasies have me wearing it. Not that it bothers me at all, but I am curious as to what point does something like that become a fetish? I actually wouldn't mind being more dominating, but I am so self conscious! I realize you have to have some pretty good self esteem to be the one dominating. I am always fretting about my figure, even after SO tells me I am beautiful. If I can get over my self image I feel like I could dominate the hell out of him. I'd love to respond to this, but you're right... we're going horribly offtopic! Maybe we could start a thread about this? I don't mean to imply that all Filipinos are scammers, but I think in recent years the number of female scam artists have been from the Philippines (or so it seems). The majority of stories I have heard are from that region. I think it applies to all poorer/third world country regions in general, not just the Philippines. Simply because a 'gift' of 500 USD may not seem much to a US citizen, but it can support a person in the Philippines for months. Poverty does strange things to people, twists them into monsters. Does your bf like it when you give him the Strap On ? Oh, Mary. There are so many things one can do in light D/s that don't involve penetration, strap-ons, or emasculation! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mary3 Posted June 9, 2010 Author Share Posted June 9, 2010 Okay I will go to Sexual Forum and Post : Do you like Bondage ? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mary3 Posted June 9, 2010 Author Share Posted June 9, 2010 Okay go to Sexual Forum . Have fun with my question ! lol Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts