Why are black women left out of the interracial dating game too?

[amerikajin]

>>>In fact most white women I have met made it known that they can take any man away from any asian woman. Also I have been told by white men that in general, white women are preferred. It has also been said that asian women usually end up with men that white women don't want to date. And from observations in the past, this used to be the trend. However with more asian faces in the media today, asian women finally have their unique beaty appreciated. <<<

 

You've been talking to the wrong caucasians. I think Asian women (East or Southeast) are among the most beautiful women in the world.

[whateverman]

Actually, many white men lie about how they feel about black women. I am a child of the Deep American South. I am very well educated (Ph.D. from a prestigious university), very beautiful, athletic, dark-skinned black woman. If I had a dime for every time a white man wanted to date me, I'd be a rich woman right now.

 

I've read a lot of comments, and quite frankly, I am quite appalled! To say that most black women are "butt ugly" and "fat" is just reprehensible!

 

Suppose I were to assert that white men have little penises?! Penis size is a very sensitive subject for white men because they know that black men [by and large...no pun intended] tend to be well endowed, comparatively speaking.

 

If I were to say that many black women ALSO don't find white men attractive; if I were to say that white men are wimps, skinny and soft; if I were to say that white men are too small and have small penises....I'd get blasted for saying all of this.

 

Yet, many of you continue to disrespect the most beautiful and diverse women on the face of the earth...BLACK WOMEN!

 

You should be ashamed of yourselves!

[BlockHead]

whateverman

If I were to say that many black women ALSO don't find white men attractive

You are entitled to your opinion.

whateverman

if I were to say that white men are wimps, skinny and soft

Why don’t you call us genetically inferior?

whateverman

if I were to say that white men are too small and have small penises....

Now you are hitting below the belt.

 

I think the concept of beauty is something conceited people obsess about.

[UCFKevin]

There's this black girl at work that is GORGEOUS and I would promptly ask her out if I didn't work with her.

[Mr Spock]

Originally posted by BlockHead

And what does this have to do with the main topic?

’Ghetto culture’ is like an infection. I hope it doesn’t spread to those places.

I agree.

 

 

I believe that ‘love’ and romance involve cathexis. I don’t see how a woman can argue her way into a man’s heart and vice versa. If two people can’t connect at the emotional level, that’s too bad. If a white man were expected to develop an interest in black women for the sake of political correctness, he would be living a lie. I think this whole argument is a joke.

 

Reckless

How would you feel if you had to develop an attraction for a certain type of man to meet a quota, to make him happy, because you are indebted to him, or because some political jackass says you must?

Tell me, do you like horribly obese (800lb ~ 360kg) white men?

 

I don’t want politics in my bedroom.

 

I stopped reading through this thread when I got to block head's posts-because I too, am not a fan of ghetto culture. I find it distasteful on ANY colour, white, native, black, asian, east indian. It's a HUGE turn off. I myself don't find black women attractive, because I like penises.

[Mr Spock]

PS-I've dabbled in different ethnic groups-I prefer my own. I don't think others are LESSER, I'm just more attracted to my own.

[hurricane495]

I am a white man and have NO PROBLEM dating any race

[iamtastee]

Gawsh! This thread is so ridiculous to the point that it is almost comical. LMAO!!!

 

"Black women are fat!"

"Black women are dumb!"

"Black women are ugly!"

 

GEE WHIZ...I've NEVER seen ANY of those characteristics in any other ethnic group.

[Engineeress]

First, I have to say to amerikajin, j I don't know what part of the deep south you claim to be from, but it doesn't get any deeper SE Lousiana, and there many of the blacks have some very white features. How do you think that happened? Somewhere along the way many white men took a shine to the black women. It has only been relatively lately that white men claim to not be attracted to black women, a product of the backlash to civil rights movement (read AESOP's fable, "The Fox and the Grapes"), but most of them in my experience are FLAT OUT LYING.

 

But this is what I really had to say. this thread assumes that men have all the dating power. That is completely unrealistic when referring to women of any race. Men ask out women they think that have a shot at because the women give them signs. All the white men here should really ask themselves, first how many black women they ACTUALLY KNOW (not just "know of") to base their opinions on, and second have any black women ever shown interest in you? It's miraculous how much more "feminine" and "attractive" a women OF ANY RACE becomes if she thinks that you are attractive. You probably have not noticed it with other women because you do not attribute their behavior to their race.

 

I would suggest changing you hair style and working on your smile in the mirror. Also trying adapting the pitch of your voice to make it smoother (listen to some Barry White or Boyz II Men). Say hi. You'll probably be amazed at how many "attractive" black women there suddenly are ;p

[iamtastee]

Engineeress,

 

You took the words right out of my mouth! I chose not to elaborate on my views and took the smart ass approach instead. Some people live their entire existence in pitiful little boxes-so why bother to try to educate them when they feel safer, smarter,more attractive,more important, and more dignified in their flimsy little world?

 

I read the posts for the drama. Hey, some of this stuff is better than a soap opera.

 

But, you made a point that I couldn't resist.

 

I'm from Alabama of all places. How DEEP South is that?? Anyhow, my complexion is quite light-my daughter is often mistaken for being biracial. BOTH of my parents have dark complexions, as well as both sets of my grandparents. So where did my color come from? Some white man must have felt desire for one of my ancestors, wouldn't you agree?? I can't count the number of times I've had conversations with white males who are attracted to and who would LOVE to date black women, but since their part of society says, "YUCK!"-so do they.

 

Anyhow,great post!

[sweetlikesugar]

Very interesting, ridiculous, and sometimes funny discussion.

 

Date who you want, attraction can't always be predicted. As long as people are happy in their relationships that's cool. There's probably some social stigma still to interracial couples depending on where you live.

 

I'm asian-canadian from vancouver and I've basically seen every combination there can be here. The most popular and visible combination is asian-caucasion. Culture plays a big role as well, 'cause some familes expect their kids to marry within their cultural group.

 

One of my best friends who's white was never asked out by a white guy, but asked out by practically every other cultural group here (mexican, to asian, to indian to native canadian). I on the other hand am constantly asked out by white guys. I'm open to all races and cultures, but I'm not asked out by them.

 

I think the good part is that it's now legal to intermarry, it was actually illegal to marry out of your race in the very recent past.

[Tiki]

I am african american female, since everyone mostly the caucasion and asian descent males on this forum are keeping it real, then I see no reason for me to spare my words. I am 31 years old I arbitrarily decided that I didn't care for dating black men or white men at this time in my life, It wasn't something someone said to me or did to me, I didn't like the direction men were leading women into. I personally believe I have a different perspective only because I am on the outside looking in, I live in Texas and yes there are white men marrying/dating black women, actually saw my first interracial kiss/public display of affection recently. I would just like to say that I'm not angry at anyone, I don't have a chip on my shoulder, I love the strength and passion of black men and white men.

 

I woke up one day and said to myself what the HELL am I doing to myself, I'm loving black men with every fiber of my being and I'm still unhappy and honestly being looked upon my own as not being good enough amongst the other social groups in my surroundings but it hurst most when it's your own at least that's how it was at the time, I re-analyzed my life and began my personal journey to focus solely on taking care of me and heal from all the hurtful thoughts and perceptions I let mold how I lived my life as a black woman

 

I focused on re-educating my self and discontinued being a product of this society, I began a spiritual journey just me and GOD and the Angels above, it was a very scar, lonely path, no one saying good job or your on the right path and believe me everything changed relationships failed and that was expected, it takes strength to tear at every fiber of your own beliefs or beliefs that were imposed upon me to find my truth. Yes God played a big part in me moving away from this world and seeking truth but I gained a new perspective and a new energized relationship with myself and the people around me.

 

HURT/ANGRY/KEEPING IT REAL ME/THIS IS MY EGO SPEAKING:This world was built on rape, hatred, idolism and lies and the effects have continued to have a trickle effect on society, MEN/BLACK/WHITE/ASIAN/ANYONE WHO BELIEVE'S THE LIES AND LIVE BY THOSE LIES OF SOCIETY ARE IGNORANT AND LOWER THAN BEAST, THEY LIVE BY THERE SENSES AND HAVEN'T EVOLVED PAST THAT....THEY SUBJECT WOMEN TO BRUTAL BEHAVIOR AND ILLUSIONS OF WHAT THEY THINK IS RIGHT AND SOME WOMEN PARTICIPATE AND VALIDATE THIS ILLUSION BY MUTILATING THERE MINDS AND BODIES ALL IN THE NAME OF ACCEPTANCE AND LOVE, MEN ARE SELFISH DOUBLE MINDED CREATURES.

 

EVERYTHING THAT MANKIND IDOLIZES WILL FALL EVERYTHING THAT THEY BELIEVE MAKES THEM WHO THEY ARE WILL BE TORN APART, THE MONEY, POWER AND EGOS WILL BE DISSOLVED LIKE THE 2 TOWERS IN NEW YORK, THAT WAS THE BEGINNING....MORE IS TO COME, WHITE MEN HAVE REIGNED ON THIS PLANET FOR OVER 2000 YEARS AND YOUR TIME IS UP, YOU HAVEN'T ACCOMPLISHED ANYTHING SPIRITUALLY...YOU STILL ACT LIKE THE BEAST YOU WERE IN THE PAST ONLY WITH A NEW TWIST, BLACK MEN SOLD THERE OWN INTO SLAVERY AND BLAME THE WHITE MEN BUT WHITE MEN COULDN'T DO ANYTHING THAT WASN'T FREELY AND WILLINGLY GIVEN AWAY, BLACK MEN YOUR FULL OF HATRED AND RESENTMENT AND IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH BLACK WOMEN...YOU SOLD YOUR BIRTH RIGHT AWAY AND NEVER RECLAIMED IT AND BLACK WOMEN HAVE SUFFERED FROM YOUR LACK OF FAITH, STRENGTH AND HONESTY...BLACK MEN AND WOMEN THAT FOUGHT FOR FREEDOM THAT WAS GIVEN FREELY AWAY TO THE WHITE MEN ARE DEAD AND BLACK WOMEN ARE LEFT WITH THE STRAIN OF WEAK BLACK MEN IN AMERICA RUNNING TO THE VERY THING THAT ENSLAVED, WHIPPED BEAT AND EMASCULATED THEM.

 

I AM SICK OF YOUR GENERALITIES AND ILL SUBJECTIVE VIEWS, LOVE AND ACCEPTANCE HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH LOOKS, SIT IN A ROOM WITH BLACK WOMEN ONE ON ONE AND YOU WILL LEARN SO MUCH MORE THAN YOU EVER THOUGHT YOU WOULD...SEPARATION BREEDS INTOLERANCE AND RENDERS YOU UNCONSCIOUS OF THE EFFECTS IT HAS ON SOCIETY,

 

FEAR=FALSE EVIDENCE APPEARING REAL........WHITE MEN HAVE FEARED THE UNKNOWN WHEN IT COMES TO HUMAN CONTACT, SURE YOU CAN FLY TO THE MOON BUT OPENING YOUR MINDS AND HEARTS TO THE DIFFERENCES IN THIS WORLD IS SOMETHING THAT YOU HAVEN'T MASTERED YOU HAVE EVOLVED TECHNICALLY BUT NOT SPIRITUALLY. BLACK MEN ARE LOST AND TRYING TO RECLAIM IDENTITY THROUGH SEX, WHITE/ASIAN WOMEN, DRUGS, SELF HATRED COVERED AS LOVE FOR SELF, IRRESPONSIBLY BLAMING BLACK WOMEN AND WHITE MEN FOR THEIR LACK OF STRENGTH TO STAND UP AND BE SEEN AND HEARD AS REAL MEN.....this is my ego speaking I don't mean any of these things that I have stated but this unloving, angry, hateful part of me that I am fully and consciously aware of spits venom. People there is always going to be a part of us that has generalities that are grossly overrated but it's upto us as God Conscious human beings not live by views that hurt everyone including ourselves.

 

GOD CONSCIOUS/LOVING ME: see I can be just like you, I can make all kinds of hurtful generalizations about people of a different race, even my own but what good does it do, who does it benefits, I prayed last night and God answered by making me realise that If I live by unhealthy, hateful, generalizations that I have enslaved myself by my own thoughts, I have enslaved others with untruths and missed out on what life is really about.

 

For me it's about embracing everyone and everything even the ugly in this world, what I resist persist, what I look at disappears....I plea to everyone on this site and in the world, go inside and analyze those thoughts that keep you from fully embracing life and if your not clear about what's real and not real, seek to find the truth from within and change those thoughts that are ugly, hateful and hurtful....not because they are wrong but because they don't fit you any longer, they don't re-present who you are.

 

I plea to white men, black men, asian men to WAKE UP! Your ways are destroying a planet that has much more meaning than how someone looks and behaves...what are you doing to dispel these myths and generalizations, have you volunteered in poor communities, have you became a big brother to youth who may not have means to see life in a new and different way...what have you done to dispel all of the hatred. White men admit that they don't take the time to really approach or get to know black women or women of color so its not really about US its about you and YOUR illusions and disinterest in people of color, its about stepping out of your comfort zone and really living life to its fullest...you might be surprised on what life really has to offer.

[simplybrill]

some of the racist comments and generalities made on this post have just made me laugh with disgust...its 2004 people, come on...

 

It should be said, if it hasnt already, that the standards of beauty that most dudes run around with in their heads are rooted deep in an aryan (sp?) standard!

 

People are walking around automatically dissing women who dont meet up to the box they've formed in their minds of what "beauty" is: because they've been brainwashed by years and years of society's BS into thinking that unless you have "certain features" that I wont even begin to note, that you're not beautiful...not making excuses for the idiots out there in the world...just stating something that sprung to mind.

 

Its just not fair, and it happens in all races, that unless you have certain features within your race, you're not considered beautiful to the masses. Ever watched the Miss Universe Pageant, or the Miss America...its like they took a bunch of pictures, and put them through a computer, and if they didnt meet the "status quo beauty queen" mould, they didnt make the cut.

 

Ever looked at the standards for print models...across all races...high cheekbones, pouty lips, symmetric features are the standard,,,and if you dont have it, forget it. Its what Ive heard more than one agency rep say point blank to girls hoping for contracts who didnt meet their strict requirements. The runway models...oi lets not go there...look so similar sometimes, especially in bone structure that they could be paper doll cutouts just colored in differently.

 

Yes once in a while there's a few runway girls that stand out, but thats a rareity, and they're the 'token' ones. Anyone else know what its like to be turned away because you look "too exotic" and they want someone who looks "plainer" and would "stand out less" in a line? Tell me if thats not whacked out...

 

My anger at the fashion industry comes to the boiling point every once in a while, and its just not fair to anyone BUT those girls who fit their mould...heaven forbid we have a hip, or two or even a healthy look to us...and the industry only reflects what society deems desirable at the moment...lets hope things change a bit faster than the snail pace that they are right now. There are good people out there, who dont care if you've got a hip or two and God bless them, hopefully their attitudes will become the norm.

[franki]

i am a white male,and you black guys are missing out on everything.I date a black woman,and she is so fine so beautiful.So sexy.

I stop dating white woman cause they are so boring.There skinny and ugly lol.

O well at least i got the good stuff.If you black guys dont want your woman,well take em,there just as sexy.

[franki]

I feel so sorry for you black guys.You all are missing out.I am a white male and i date a black woman.

Dang she is so hot.I stop dating white woman cause thee so boring,skinny and ugly.Black woman are so beautiful.I only date black woman.If u black guys dont want ur woman we can have them. lol

[dyermaker]

It looks to me like white women hereafter are missing out on a whole lotta franki

[Tilly]

Originally posted by iamtastee

Gawsh! This thread is so ridiculous to the point that it is almost comical. LMAO!!!

 

"Black women are fat!"

"Black women are dumb!"

"Black women are ugly!"

 

GEE WHIZ...I've NEVER seen ANY of those characteristics in any other ethnic group.

 

sounds to me your the fat, dumb, ugly one on the site, have you ever heard that saying what you see in others you see it in yourself first or maybe your brain is fat, dumb and ugly...grow up and get out of the back woods. There are some dumb, fat, ugly white, Asian, Hispanic, black, Hawaiian person in every race...but to pin point one set race is ridiculous....I guess you don't see any of those people were your from

GIVE ME A BREAK .

[rubie]

I think I concur with a lot of what Tiki said.

 

Also, I am a white female, 20 years old, working in a predominately black neighborhood. About 75% of my customers are black. I have seen nearly every combination of couples walk in the store: black man/white woman, white man/black woman, white man/white woman, Asian man/white woman, Asian woman/ white man, black man/black woman... etc. Match them up and I've seen it. There is one couple in particular whom I find very interesting in that the man is half white, half black and the woman is half Indian/half Hispanic. They're a very lovely set and they have a beautiful little girl.

 

I think race is irrelevant because your soul has no race. Only Love is real.

 

Furthermore, as far as why it seems that black women are left out of the interracial dating game, I'm not sure. I think a lot of them are lovely. As are white women, asian women, Indian women, Hispanic women, etc. Every woman is pretty in her own way.

[SweetEbony]

Why are black women left out in the dating scene?

 

…Simple.

 

Because they CHOOSE to be. Black women loosing out in the ‘dating department’ doesn’t reflect our beauty but their ‘Only a black man mind-set’. Many white and non-black men desire black women not only because of our ‘trade mark’ physiques, but our strength and our vociferous ‘attitudes’. As a young black women myself who is currently involved with a WONDERFUL, compassionate, successful and very handsome white man, and have dated many men from various cultures, have found that non-black men particularly white men VERY much so desire black women, as I’ve encountered and experienced throughout my existence as well as MANY other black females who have.

 

White males particularly (some), JUST don’t approach women PERIOD! ...whether they be white, black, Asian etc (Unless maybe they’re with groups of friends) ….I’m told because of FEAR of rejection. I’ve had PLENTY of white male co-workers, acquaintances, and friends approach me (knowing I’m involved with a white man) asking how to approach black women, and HOW my husband approached me, wanting “tips”. I even work with this one white male who is extremely fond of black women (and might I add, very handsome), but terrified of making that step to approach any. I’ve also noticed this with ‘others’ as well.

 

But also At times we as black women need to evaluate OURSELVES too, sometimes when non-black men comment on our beauty we polarize it as ‘he's just trying to make sexual advancements’ types of attitudes. Which shouldn’t be assumed.

 

Some Black women are FAR too dependent on black men for emotional and physical support, thinking ONLY a black man can truly love and support them and NOT even wanting to explore their options, because as some white men, ‘fear of rejection’ and ‘he/she may not truly understand me’,’ we may not have anything in common’ etc…starts shooting around in their heads. Also if they had experienced any unfortunate encounters, it may reflect their decision to JUST desire from a FAR, then rather together as one. Black women who do not date IR, doesn’t automatically mean they ONLY desire black men.

 

Bearing in mind that I know MANY trolls patrol forums and message boards (particularly this or related topics) Posting under numerous usernames, and occasionally you’ll have the ones who log in as ‘guest’ to offer unnecessary, impolite and FOOLISH remarks then log back in to their usual usernames ONLY to offer MORE and TRY get a rise out of folks, I will pass up on some of the loutish comments made here, as some or ALL could just as well be FAKES. AS should any other black females who reads those posts.

 

We as black are very beautiful, and we should at no time underestimate our beauty… why else would so many ‘other’ females PAY to get what we have naturally? We are VERY beautiful women, desired by so many, and I am very happy to see that now more and more black women are beginning to open their hearts to the many different races of men on this earth and seeing beyond skin tone. With our advancements in the employment and educational arenas FAR more then black men, this gives us many chances to explore, evaluate and get involved with decent NON-black men.

 

 

BLACK WOMEN IGNORE THESE COMMENTS!!!!

[Tilly]

Some Black women are FAR too dependent on black men for emotional and physical support, thinking ONLY a black man can truly love and support them and NOT even wanting to explore their options, because as some white men, ‘fear of rejection’ and ‘he/she may not truly understand me’,’ we may not have anything in common’ etc…starts shooting around in their heads. Also if they had experienced any unfortunate encounters, it may reflect their decision to JUST desire from a FAR, then rather together as one. Black women who do not date IR, doesn’t automatically mean they ONLY desire black men.

 

I too am a black woman who has arbitrarily decided to date outside my race...at this point in time I have 2 gentlemen callers that happen to be Asian...and trust me I am enjoying every moment of it. I know the concerns of black women, but I too have had a time getting my sista's to wake up and go where the love is.

 

I think in time our desire's (black women) will change...but first we have to accept who we are and work with what we have, the media plays a big part in putting out untrue perceptions of black women.

 

I am glad that you put this post out here...and hopefully black women who read your post will Wake Up and do the same.

 

I say go where the love is...and if it's not with a black man so be it.

[cdn23]

hmmmmm, i just wanna say that i love an asian guy.... i mean hes phillipino, but still asian, right? and hella girls also get attracted by phillipinos in my school... the black girls aint left behind there either.... there's hellatight and hella guys desire them

[Proto]

Sorry to resurrect this old topic, but these last few posts have been a joke at best..

 

 

"We strong educated sistas need to get away from the EVIL, VILE black man!"

 

 

LOL! Let it go!

 

 

 

Yes, I am a black male.....but you wanna know who gives me the time of day? WHITE females. White girls are the ones who approach me, ask for my number, wanna go out on dates with me, etc, etc. If more black girls approached me than I'd be dating them too, love has no color.

 

With that said however, I'm going to go where the demand is and the demand for me among many white girls is FAR higher than the demand for me amongst sistas, so I'm going to date white girls.

 

 

Oh...and I prefer thick, full-figured, voluptous women, and more white girls than ever are getting those physical features. YUM!!

[arcadia]

wow this is one long, ugly thread...

 

i am probably going to get jumped by saying this.. but i really wanna try to help some of these people out who have had bad experiences with other races...

 

for starters, i am from a military family, so i've been all over the world and never really had any kind of racial problems until i moved here to georgia.. but i will get to that in a sec..

 

 

Lots of people here are apalled by reading others comments in which they generalize people of other races due to their experiences with them. I agree that this shouldn't be the case, and that people should know that not all people are the same.. but can a person really help what they have been exposed to? People in the south are often thought of as stupid rednecks by people in the north. I have actually had someone tell me that they truly thought all people who lived in alabama worked on a farm. Why? because that's what they were exposed to. You ever notice how the news always picks the most southern redneck in the city to interview on tv when representing the south? I laugh about it.. but it gives people the wrong idea.

 

If, as someone said here earlier, you go to a school where 85% of the population is made up of ghetto black students and those are the only black people you have ever met... of course you are going to assume something.

 

Stereotypes exist for a reason. and all races have their own stereotypes. Luckily, for some people, who have been exposed to lots of different types of people, they wont buy in to the stereotypes. But others arent so lucky. They don't know any better.

 

 

stereotypes can work in the opposite direction too... I lived in San Antonio, Texas for a few years. There, the mexican culture is abundant. The people are super friendly and well spoken for the most part. When i moved to Atlanta, where the mexican culture is also abundant, i assumed it would be the same. However, it wasn't. Here all i have encountered was people that make lewd comments in my direction when i walk by and loiter outside the salvation army all day. Of course i know better and wont make the generalization that all mexicans are rude, but from my experience, i can honestly say that all the ones i have met in atlanta are rude. Because that is what i have been exposed to.

 

 

so to sum up.... stereotypes suck. but they exist for a reason. people that buy into them only do so because that is what they have been exposed to. They don't know any better. We will just hope that they learn.

[YellowLioness]

I'm one of the first white girls my fiance has dated. He likes black women because to him (about the whitest white boy you can get) they are exotic. Plus, they are much stronger then he percieves white women to be, though I have changed this opinion.

[cdn23]

so yeah, the only thing i mean here is that U MUST BE WRONG ABOUT RACES, no one who writes here seems to be against black ppl u know? i mean, everything one has their taste and black arent left behind...