Why do guys think heavily photoshopped photos are real

[TheBigQuestion]

I certainly don't think heavily photoshopped images of women are "real," nor do I know any man who thinks that anyone who does not conform to the photoshopped image is antithetical to beauty. I saw absolutely gorgeous women on a daily basis when I was in college (and still do to some extent), ones that rival or exceed pretty much anything you see in any magazine. These girls were extremely physically attractive, and there's no such thing as in-person photoshopping. And it's not like I lived in Silicone Valley or anything. I went to school and live in New Jersey. I guess the point I'm trying to make is that I question how insane this standard of beauty has to be if it can be seen on a daily basis wherever attractive women tend to congregate. Seriously. Women with flat abs, pretty/gorgeous face, long legs, etc, are a dime a dozen from what I can tell. I can walk into any bar in Hoboken, New Brunswick, the shore, etc, and see them. I agree that Jessica Alba doesn't need to be photoshopped, but I disagree that men's expectations of what they'd ideally like to date are being dictated by evil magazine photographers and editors.

 

Women sure do like to complain about unrealistic expectations of beauty, yet almost every guy I know personally is not into "stick figure" women. Being rail thin is quite a turn off to most men I know. I don't think the heroin chic look has been "in" for about 15 years now. If people are going to crusade against something (and rightfully so), go after the media, but don't assume guys are buying into it. From my experience, they aren't, and this is coming from a guy who has acquaintances with often unrealistically high standards.

[homersheineken]

Every thread there are guys posting their ideal woman on there and 99% of the time the photos are heavily photoshopped.

 

Why do they do this?

 

 

Do they really believe those girls really look like that?

 

http://www.sandstorming.com/images/nikibandafter.jpg

 

I like the first one better. I don't like the photoshop look at all. Imperfections are sexy.

[Green]

a lot of guys are perves who watch amature porn... What I'm trying to say is men love seeing women in motion.. like the real world. I'd say that more then half of those photo shopped images are meant to look pretty for other women not men.

[Jersey Shortie]

Is the embodiment of raw beauty.

 

Huh??

 

While women didn't hold men to any kind of standard at all.

 

Give. Me. A. Break

 

No you give women a break Dude. Seriously. I repeat, in a study done, after viewing porn and beautiful women, men were less happy and more critical of their partners bodies. What does this fact have to do with standards men have to meet? Why can't you directly address this comment instead of using lame deflection? I never said men didn't have to live up to certain expectations. You want talk about that? Great. Start another thread. But you know what? You won't start another thread because you don't want to talk about it. You only want to use the "but men have this happen.." so you can avoid being real in your conversation about what women experience.

 

What if I told you a friend of mine told me a story about how his cousin's gf broke up with him because he wasn't enough like Edward from twilight?

 

This has nothing to do with the qouted fact you cited me for about the study done on men and their opinion of their own partner having looking at fantasy images of other women. You can either discuss this, or go back to chirping about Edward from Twilight. But know that you chirping about Edward and Twiglight doesn't help anyone here and is a deflection to avoid acknowledging the standards set up for women to fail at. (This is where you continue to point out that men have issues too and because of that, we shouldn't discuss women and the things they must deal with seperately. I'll stand by and wait for your standard response.)

 

Men respond to real or fake pictures because we're visual. We've been through this.Take it up with mother nature if it bothers you that much.

 

And you prove the point I've made countless times. Too often, some men use the "visual" excuse for justifications on poor behavior. There is a big difference between "mother nature" and justifying behavior under being "visual" in complete utter selfish indugence. Everytime you justify behavior under "we're visual" , what you are really doing is self-indugling yourself and giving excuses to behavior that is more of a weakness then a strength. Now it's one thing to find women attractive. It's another to use your sexuality to defend everything you as a man do.

[TheBigQuestion]

How exactly does responding positively to visual depictions of beautiful women constitute bad behavior though? Being attracted to a depiction of an attractive woman isn't an evil thing.

[Jersey Shortie]

What do you consider a "positive" response? A man spending time infront of his computer isolated from reality enjoying his fantasy of a woman that presents an unnaturally fake, humanly corrupted ideal?

 

And who said anything was "evil"? And why do you take on the defensive attitude that we are saying being attracted to images of attractive women is evil? No one even said anything close to that.

 

It doesn't mean that it's healthy either just because men have a sexual response to these images. The perception of women in the media is not a healthy one. I think even men can see that. Yet, alot of men defend these images and buy into them because they draw an emotional and physical response. Yet at the same time, tell women they shouldn't buy into these images or try to be like them even though men clearly LOVE them. This arguement has never been about people not understanding that images aren't real. However, men buy into them because they respond to them. And if these images are fake, and are fed to us at the quantity they are today through all our technology, there are so many social issues at work because of it.

 

And while being turned on by images of beautiful women isn't unnatural or wrong, when men end up looking less kindly to the real woman in their lives, that's really messed up. And the fact is that men infact do look on less kindly to average women.

[USMCHokie]

How exactly does responding positively to visual depictions of beautiful women constitute bad behavior though? Being attracted to a depiction of an attractive woman isn't an evil thing.

 

 

It's not the positive responses to enhanced visual depictions that's being looked down upon, but the resultant negative responses to "real" visual depictions and/or real people just because they don't meet the unrealistic standard set by those enhanced images.

[Woggle]

Women look less kindly on average men as well. Look at all times you hear about married women having affairs and divorcing because their husband is not some adonis from out of a romance novel. How much do you want to bet that quite a few divorces happened after those Twilight movies came out?

[SarahRose]

What do you consider a "positive" response? A man spending time infront of his computer isolated from reality enjoying his fantasy of a woman that presents an unnaturally fake, humanly corrupted ideal?

 

And who said anything was "evil"? And why do you take on the defensive attitude that we are saying being attracted to images of attractive women is evil? No one even said anything close to that.

 

It doesn't mean that it's healthy either just because men have a sexual response to these images. The perception of women in the media is not a healthy one. I think even men can see that. Yet, alot of men defend these images and buy into them because they draw an emotional and physical response. Yet at the same time, tell women they shouldn't buy into these images or try to be like them even though men clearly LOVE them. This arguement has never been about people not understanding that images aren't real. However, men buy into them because they respond to them. And if these images are fake, and are fed to us at the quantity they are today through all our technology, there are so many social issues at work because of it.

 

And while being turned on by images of beautiful women isn't unnatural or wrong, when men end up looking less kindly to the real woman in their lives, that's really messed up. And the fact is that men infact do look on less kindly to average women.

 

And it is clear they do. Just read the many posts on here where the guys reduce women to a number or body parts to be critiqued and analyzed. Even in this thread men claim to see such perfection in real life so they think it is an attainable goal.

 

Then there are the threads where the girls complain the guys picks their appearance apart. They wear the wrong clothing, their breasts are too small, too big, they are too heavy, not heavy enough, too much makeup, not enough makeup and it just goes on and on.

 

Clearly these men are expressing their dissatisfaction with real life women as women less than a number 8 aren't even worth speaking to or acknowledging their existence.

 

Then there are the many threads from guys who have no clue on how to even speak to a woman as instead of getting out and interacting in the world they are online wanking to porn and fantasizing about celebrities.

 

Yet they will defend their right to be boys and gawk at the fake images they see and their expectation that they can only date women who look like those images. I can only imagine what the consequences to our society will be in 20 years or so.

[Zed]

This sort of mass programming is so manipulative and tragic, because it works on the subliminal level. Many people know rationally that the idealized images are not real, yet those are the ones that turn them on, that they hold in their mind as perfection. And that influences so many decisions, including how people spend their money, what products they buy, how they behave, how they dress, and how they select a partner.

 

Agree. One way this programming has changed how women especially view their bodies is that Plastic surgery has actually increased significantly among teen girls with breast implants and liposuction being one of the more popular procedures. Although the FDA has set for the guideline that no one under 18 can be operated on that rule is rarely enforced. Girls as young as 12 have submitted for procedures and if you have the cash and a doctor refuses because you require multiple procedures, here in America you can hop on over to Brazil which has a brisk trade and is far less discriminating with teen patients. The trend of boobs for graduating high school etc.

 

Therefore natural beauty is still influenced by a very idealized notion and guys won’t really know that his girlfriend may have got a breast lift, Botox, lip fillers, a nose job and liposuction—because he assumes (except maybe the beast implants) everything else is all natural and untouched.

[Woggle]

What does it say about modern women that many men would rather wack off to an image than date a real one? If you think porn is bad today you should have seen what it was like in the 70s. You could walk down the street in some cities without being assaulted by hardcore smut all around yet most men back then prefered real women. These days many men would rather wack off to an image than deal with the drama of modern relationships. Most of the frustration many men have has little to do with looks also.

[MrNate]

Huh??

Jessica Alba is one of the most beautiful women alive.

 

 

No you give women a break Dude. Seriously. I repeat, in a study done, after viewing porn and beautiful women, men were less happy and more critical of their partners bodies. What does this fact have to do with standards men have to meet? Why can't you directly address this comment instead of using lame deflection? I never said men didn't have to live up to certain expectations. You want talk about that? Great. Start another thread. But you know what? You won't start another thread because you don't want to talk about it. You only want to use the "but men have this happen.." so you can avoid being real in your conversation about what women experience.

Um. I don't know what you're getting at. All I can see here is that you brought up some study (which can be manipulated, like any other study) in which men were less happy with their partners after viewing porn etc. So what? This might be a tad revolutionary but....you can not make an assumption of all men based off some silly study. I don't care what the results were. I'll let you know when a study represents my way of thinking.

 

This has nothing to do with the qouted fact you cited me for about the study done on men and their opinion of their own partner having looking at fantasy images of other women. You can either discuss this, or go back to chirping about Edward from Twilight. But know that you chirping about Edward and Twiglight doesn't help anyone here and is a deflection to avoid acknowledging the standards set up for women to fail at. (This is where you continue to point out that men have issues too and because of that, we shouldn't discuss women and the things they must deal with seperately. I'll stand by and wait for your standard response.)

Let's save the cute threats for another time eh?

 

Refer to my first response concerning your study. Hm, I think I got the answer you want: Men set standards that women have trouble living up to. I'm sorry we males have made it so difficult for you women to meet the ridiculous expectations we set. Is that good enough? Ah, and if I somehow locked the door to women being able to discuss the issues they deal with, I have unlocked it now.

 

 

And you prove the point I've made countless times. Too often, some men use the "visual" excuse for justifications on poor behavior. There is a big difference between "mother nature" and justifying behavior under being "visual" in complete utter selfish indugence. Everytime you justify behavior under "we're visual" , what you are really doing is self-indugling yourself and giving excuses to behavior that is more of a weakness then a strength. Now it's one thing to find women attractive. It's another to use your sexuality to defend everything you as a man do.

Some. Not all. The rest of your in depth analysis, as far as I'm concerned is null and void. Since no man, no woman, no study, no nothing, can speak for the mind of every male.

[marsle85]

Women look less kindly on average men as well. Look at all times you hear about married women having affairs and divorcing because their husband is not some adonis from out of a romance novel. How much do you want to bet that quite a few divorces happened after those Twilight movies came out?

 

LOL, that's laughable. I'm sorry, but any modestly intelligent, mature woman would not divorce her husband because her husband wasn't sparkly and lacked fangs.

[Woggle]

LOL, that's laughable. I'm sorry, but any modestly intelligent, mature woman would not divorce her husband because her husband wasn't sparkly and lacked fangs.

 

I would not be shocked if there were many women who were angry that their marriage lacked the passion and drama in those movies.

[MrNate]

I feel sorry for the guy who lost out to some silly vampire in such a silly series of books. At least he will have a story to tell.

Edited June 1, 2010 by MrNate

[TheBigQuestion]

What do you consider a "positive" response? A man spending time infront of his computer isolated from reality enjoying his fantasy of a woman that presents an unnaturally fake, humanly corrupted ideal?

 

And who said anything was "evil"? And why do you take on the defensive attitude that we are saying being attracted to images of attractive women is evil? No one even said anything close to that.

 

It doesn't mean that it's healthy either just because men have a sexual response to these images. The perception of women in the media is not a healthy one. I think even men can see that. Yet, alot of men defend these images and buy into them because they draw an emotional and physical response. Yet at the same time, tell women they shouldn't buy into these images or try to be like them even though men clearly LOVE them. This arguement has never been about people not understanding that images aren't real. However, men buy into them because they respond to them. And if these images are fake, and are fed to us at the quantity they are today through all our technology, there are so many social issues at work because of it.

 

And while being turned on by images of beautiful women isn't unnatural or wrong, when men end up looking less kindly to the real woman in their lives, that's really messed up. And the fact is that men infact do look on less kindly to average women.

 

A positive response just means that a person likes it; any positive physical or emotional response. The response itself cannot be categorized as good or bad, healthy or unhealthy. It simply is. Actions predicated on it are the only things that can be judged in such a way. I didn't mean to appear defensive either, but you certainly made it sound like being attracted to images of beautiful women was a bad thing, and that biological justifications for it should not be taken as seriously as moral ones. Being attracted to the image is not any different than being attracted to the person itself.

 

And like I said in a previous post in this thread, I fail to see how this supposed "ideal" is "unnaturally fake," because I see it EVERYWHERE in real life, and as I also said before, there is no real-life photoshop. I'm not hanging out in places where all the daddies can afford to give their princesses new boobs and other plastic surgery as birthday gifts. Using facebook as a present day indicator, I would say that about 15-20 of the girls in my high school graduating class of 200 (about 100 were females) could easily do/already do some type of modeling, or have some part-time work where looks are of utmost importance (alcoholic beverage promoters, go-go dancers, bartenders, shot girls, etc). Now, I'm not saying that all this photoshopping is a GOOD thing, but I really question just how much it's getting into men's heads when I hear so many talk about how they dislike images of women that look overly "fake." From what I've seen, for example, the vast majority of guys would not want a woman with fake breasts. I disagree that men fawn over these images and actively seek women exactly like the ones depicted as relationship partners.

 

What I don't understand is why you're so appalled at the fact that, all other relevant facts being equal (and I know they usually aren't, bear with me just for the sake of the discussion), people prefer the highly attractive over average. No amount of guilt-tripping, no amount of telling people how unfair it is, is going to make someone change what they like. Just because I find Scarlett Johannson extremely attractive does not mean that I send notes to every woman I know who doesn't look as good as her stating that they are inferior, and I've never dumped a woman for having a 28" instead of a 26" waist. I'm not saying that the media doesn't play a role, but I really think that a lot of body insecurity is perpetuated by women themselves more than men, or any other one factor for that matter.

[Peitho]

Being attracted to the image is not any different than being attracted to the person itself.

Sooo, what happened to ‘this is only an image’ theory?

 

Just because I find Scarlett Johannson extremely attractive does not mean that I send notes to every woman I know who doesn't look as good as her stating that they are inferior, and I've never dumped a woman for having a 28" instead of a 26" waist.

26.5'' here, but anyway ….

 

On behalf of all women with weists over 28” , I would like to thank you!!! Thank you for not sending the notes!!

Your efforts are much appreciated!

[DanielMadr]

Every thread there are guys posting their ideal woman on there and 99% of the time the photos are heavily photoshopped.

 

Why do they do this?

 

 

Do they really believe those girls really look like that?

 

http://www.sandstorming.com/images/nikibandafter.jpg

 

Yes, lots of pictures are fake. They have to be because the girls are not that pretty or they are but the light is bad.

 

Heavily falsified imaged are laughable BUT make no mistake there are girls which are stunning with or without makeup in real life. I know a few. So the perfect beauty does exist in real life. So some girls do really look like that.

 

In my class at high school not a single boy had a photo of some celebrity on the wall. Why? There were girls around who were 10 times more beautiful than the best fabricated picture.

 

Advice:

Stop worrying about what makes you insecure and uneasy. And don't try to join the "Let's ban this because it lowers our normal girls' value" party. It is lame and dangerous for society and for yourself too.

[Eeyore79]

I would like to point out that the issue isn't men setting standards for women to live up to, it's society setting standards for women to live up to. Women are as guilty as men are - we judge ourselves and other women by unrealistic standards. I look at other women and evaluate them in comparison to what I see in the media, and I'm critical if they're overweight or don't wear makeup etc. I know that guys prefer a bit of meat on my bones, because they've told me so, but I still diet and exercise with the aim of being stick thin like the women portrayed in the media.

 

Fashion models, for example, are not super slim to appeal to men - they're skinny because women demand to see clothes displayed on skinny frames. The front rows at the fashion shows are full of women, not leering men. I've seen photos of clothes displayed on fat women, and it dissuades me from buying the clothes because they don't look nice - marketing is aspirational, and women don't aspire to look like fatties. Women demand to see skinny models and celebrities as much as men do! Look at the criticism Britney Spears got for being "fat" and "out of shape" when she appeared on MTV looking like this: http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_cVZQ6feQJPs/R1ALLhpJ9UI/AAAAAAAAACM/dqb-PwIPTrM/s1600-R/britney_spears_mtv_vma_20073_lg.jpg

[DanielMadr]

'Video games are responsible for me sitting in prison after killing those people.'

 

'Photoshopped pictures of hot women are responsible why nobody wants to date me or why I have eating disorder.'

 

Give me a break

 

Maybe it is not about photos to be too perfect but about girls being too lazy today. Some girls do work out to compensate for overdose of nutrition we have today. Some girls do try to look pretty. Some girls go on first date with no make up at all. Zero effort.

 

Maybe I'm right and maybe I'm wrong. Maybe you are just lazy or maybe he is incapable of feelings towards you because he is brainwashed. But if you blame the society and therefore stop any effort you will never know the truth.

 

I think there is some truth to "Beauty is less scarce today so we don't appreciate that much and therefore we are having higher standards" a little BUT in most cases the girl is just finding excuse not to get on the treadmill. She would rather rip down all billboards....or rather made the government do it.

[Woggle]

Women are actually harder on each other than men are. At work I see the women at lunch break looking at People and other tabloids making the most vicious comments about women. They criticize what they wear and how their hair looks and half of them get called skanks. I also see this waiting in line at the supermarket. I never see men doing this. Also women and gay men run the fashion industry which pushes the anorexic look.

Edited June 1, 2010 by Woggle

[Jersey Shortie]

On a side note, I think Jessica Alba is very attractive and cute but I don't get the hubbub over her personally. I digress.

 

A positive response just means that a person likes it; any positive physical or emotional response. The response itself cannot be categorized as good or bad, healthy or unhealthy. It simply is.

 

I have to hugely disagree with that TheBigQ. We categorize human behavior all the time. That's how we form opinions and make choices in our personal lives about the kind of person we want to be. Good. Bad. Dangerous. Healthy. Distructive. Helpful.

 

I think there is a confusion about "positive response" and "healthy". Child molesters have positive responses sexually to children in their own minds eye. They get a happy feeling. Just because something makes you happy, doesn't mean it's healthy.

 

I didn't mean to appear defensive either, but you certainly made it sound like being attracted to images of beautiful women was a bad thing, and that biological justifications for it should not be taken as seriously as moral ones. Being attracted to the image is not any different than being attracted to the person itself.

 

I don't at all think being attracted to beautiful women is a bad thing at all. What I find "bad" is the unrealistic ideals in the media of women that many men seem to buy into. If men didn't buy into it, they wouldn't have emotional pleasing response to imagery of photoshopped, surgically enhanced women. I don't think the media's atittude toward women does anything good for men or women. I understand why men and women get lured by pop media and what defines femininity. That doesn't mean I think it's healthy. Especially so in the digital age where we consum alot of subtle messages withouth knowing it just about endlessly.

 

 

I would say that about 15-20 of the girls in my high school graduating class of 200 (about 100 were females) could easily do/already do some type of modeling, or have some part-time work where looks are of utmost importance (alcoholic beverage promoters, go-go dancers, bartenders, shot girls, etc).

 

And the other 75-80 girls will have to stand by while their husbands and boyfriends go to oggle these other girls. And when their husbands or boyfriends come home and hop on the computer to pull one out to other gorgeous women, or come home to ohave sex with her after being turned on by what her own man considers the cream of the crop, he can crawl into bed with his loved one and wonder what breakfast she is cooking the next morning. Every girls dream.

 

Now, I'm not saying that all this photoshopping is a GOOD thing, but I really question just how much it's getting into men's heads when I hear so many talk about how they dislike images of women that look overly "fake." From what I've seen, for example, the vast majority of guys would not want a woman with fake breasts. I disagree that men fawn over these images and actively seek women exactly like the ones depicted as relationship partners.

 

There was a thread on you months back where a young woman all of 20 said her breasts sagged. A lot of the younger men commented that no 20 year olds breasts should sag and how she should get herself fixed. For me, that showed alot of delusions men have about what a real female body si about. Do men want flesh and blood or silcone and plastic? I'm not so sure the answer is black and white.

 

There was also an article I read in a magazine that showed a case study of men three images of the same model with varying levels of make up and asked the men before they looked at the pictures, how much make-up they liked on a woman. Most of the men said very little, they liked the natural look! After being show the 3 images of the same model, one image with very little make-up, one with medium amount, and lastly, one with alot. The men were asked to rate which one looked the best. Most men picked the medium amount. What a man might construe as being natural, might not be. why should men know how much make up a woman puts on to look good? I wouldn't expect him to. But it says alot about what men's perception is of what is natural for me. I am no way saying men are dumb or ignorant. Not at all! I just think that men are easily tricked by the visual.

 

What I don't understand is why you're so appalled at the fact that, all other relevant facts being equal (and I know they usually aren't, bear with me just for the sake of the discussion), people prefer the highly attractive over average. No amount of guilt-tripping, no amount of telling people how unfair it is, is going to make someone change what they like.

 

My goal isn't to change what people like TheBigQ. My goal is to have honest discussion. Why do you assume that anyone is trying to guilt trip anyone? Just because there are some honest opinion in this thread?

 

Just because I find Scarlett Johannson extremely attractive does not mean that I send notes to every woman I know who doesn't look as good as her stating that they are inferior, and I've never dumped a woman for having a 28" instead of a 26" waist. I'm not saying that the media doesn't play a role, but I really think that a lot of body insecurity is perpetuated by women themselves more than men, or any other one factor for that matter.

 

Well, if you did, that would make you extremely socially ackward. I think men settle for average women while they still pine for what they define as a super hottie. Then they expect average women to be content with being told how average they are. There isn't a woman from 5-90 that doesn't delight in being beautiful. It's an inherent female thing. one that often takes on a battle like quality in media that is trying to sell us product after product.

 

And I totally agree that a fair amount of body insecurity is perpetuated by women themselves. But I do not agree that women do it more so then men. We attack ourselves in different ways.

 

I will also add that we can't fight it alone. You can't expect women to be above the message about a woman's body while their own men buy right into it. I do my best to fight the media's perception of what a womans' body should be. I have my insecurities. But being out in the real world all day, fighting those messages and dealing with them, only to come home to a man that is oggling more sexy women online is deadening to the female soul. He is buying the exact message I am trying to fight. he is bringing it into the home. Women can't even get any peace from these messages in their own homes anymore. We don't ever get a break.

[Jersey Shortie]

I would like to point out that the issue isn't men setting standards for women to live up to, it's society setting standards for women to live up to. Women are as guilty as men are - we judge ourselves and other women by unrealistic standards. I look at other women and evaluate them in comparison to what I see in the media, and I'm critical if they're overweight or don't wear makeup etc. I know that guys prefer a bit of meat on my bones, because they've told me so, but I still diet and exercise with the aim of being stick thin like the women portrayed in the media.

 

 

 

I do agree with this Eeyore. Women also by into the standards. But we can't sit there and say "it's okay when men buy into it! But women should be above these things!".

[Eclypse]

Maybe I just hit the jackpot, but my girlfriend happens to have legs that look just like the ones in the photoshopped image of the girl in the OP In my eyes she is amazingly beautiful, and that is all that counts imo!

[Jersey Shortie]

In my eyes she is amazingly beautiful, and that is all that counts imo!

 

Totally!