How come I can't find a girlfriend?

[Mikeyy]

I don't understand stand how come I can't find a girlfriend? I live up here in NY and there are many pretty girls out there. I'm 20 years old and out of school at the moment. I'm not in college right now either. I'm running my parents business at the moment cause right now that's where I feel I should be. Last time I had a girlfriend 2 years ago back in high school during my senior year. I tried joining that Zoosk website on facebook and tried messaging some girls and they view my profile but never message me. I don't know how to meet girls either. Sometimes I'll see one in the grocery store and they will look at me and stare for a second then turn away. What does that mean? I don't go out too often cause I like keeping to myself. I never go to parties or anything like that and don't associate with my friends too much either. I'm just a regular normal looking guy I guess. I just don't know what to do.

 

By the way when I do say something to a girl stupid words come out of my mouth and I choke on my own salavation lmao and my throat dries up. There was this one girl that gave me her number on Zoosk and we talked and after that she stopped talking to me. I guess I'm unattractive to women

[Green]

I don't understand stand how come I can't find a girlfriend?

 

I'll try to answer that question for you!

 

I live up here in NY and there are many pretty girls out there.

 

Well this is a great attitude. Half the battle is having an eye that can spot the pretty ladies. I some times call it "bird watching"

 

I'm 20 years old and out of school at the moment. I'm not in college right now either. I'm running my parents business at the moment cause right now that's where I feel I should be.Last time I had a girlfriend 2 years ago back in high school during my senior year.

 

Well here are some big reasons you don't have a gf.

 

1) You are only 20... I didn't get my act togather until I was 22... but your doing better then I did because I never really had a gf in HS.

 

2) You aren't in college right now. That is probably the easiest most natural place for a person your age to meet women. But if you feel that running your parents business is where you need to be then thats what you should do.

 

I tried joining that Zoosk website on facebook and tried messaging some girls and they view my profile but never message me.

 

Internet dating sucks, especialy for YOUNG MEN. I would suggest that if you continue to use internet dating you think of it more as a TOOL to suplement your REAL WORLD SEARCH and not as your only hope. I NEVER had any luck with dating websites.

 

I don't know how to meet girls either. Sometimes I'll see one in the grocery store and they will look at me and stare for a second then turn away. What does that mean? I don't go out too often cause I like keeping to myself. I never go to parties or anything like that and don't associate with my friends too much either. I'm just a regular normal looking guy I guess. I just don't know what to do.

 

You meet girls by GOING OUT into the world and LIVING LIFE. That means meeting girls at the bank while you wait in line, or at the supermarket while you shop for food. HECK it even means asking out that cute cashier who rang you up for socks... You get the point... those pretty women you admire from afar every time you look out your window... well you go up and make CONTACT... you 1) Make friendly/flirty conversation 2) ASK THEM OUT for example "Lets get dinner tonight I know this great place" 3) You KISS THEM ect. on the date.

 

When that girl was eying you at the grocery store WHO KNOWS WHAT THAT MEANT. IF YOU LIKED HER then you should have done the 1)flirt 2)ask out 3) kiss and have fun that I outlined up above. Dude DO NOT FEAR rejection.

 

DO NOT TALK YOURSELF OUT OF ACTION. thoughts like "what if she says no" "what if she thinks I'm a creep" "what if other people hear me and think I'm a loser" SHOULD BE GONE. THINK "Well the only way she will ever say yes is if I ask" "She doesn't know me so if she thinks I'm a creep then she is a LOSER" and "I hope people hear me ask this girl out, then they will know I have BALLS"

 

Like I said you meet the girls by going OUT and LIVING LIFE. You are not doing yourself any favors if you arn't hanging out with friends and going to their parties. Because if they throw parties and are inviting you then that is a great place to meet women.

 

Also I wouldn't worry about how you look. There is no such thing as average and some girl out there is going to find you HOTTTT

 

By the way when I do say something to a girl stupid words come out of my mouth and I choke on my own salavation lmao and my throat dries up. There was this one girl that gave me her number on Zoosk and we talked and after that she stopped talking to me. I guess I'm unattractive to women

 

Girls think its cute when a guy gets nervouse. Really the key is to go ahead and ASK THE GIRL OUT ANY WAY... then when you are on the date just KISS her before the night is through.

 

FINALY THE MOST IMPORTANT TIP OF ALL IS... ENJOY YOURSELF... HAVE FUN WITH IT..... IF you are all nervouse and worried about some random girl rejecting you then you will be stressed and whats the point. HAVE FUN WITH ASKING GIRLS OUT... LAUGH ABOUT IT TO YOURSELF... THINK ABOUT HOW NICE IT IS GOING TO BE TO GET YOUR HANDS ALL OVER HER... ASK MANY GIRLS OUT>.. DON"T FEAR REJECTIOn.... ENJOY YOURSELF... MAKE ASKING GIRLS OUT AND DATING GIRLS SOMETHING YOU LOOK FOWARD TOOO... GIRLS LIKE TO HAVE FUN... AND THE BEST WAY FOR THEM TO HAVE FUN IS IF YOUUU ARRRRRRRE HAVING FUNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!! YIPPPPPPY

[tman666]

I'll try to answer that question for you!

 

 

 

Well this is a great attitude. Half the battle is having an eye that can spot the pretty ladies. I some times call it "bird watching"

 

 

 

Well here are some big reasons you don't have a gf.

 

1) You are only 20... I didn't get my act togather until I was 22... but your doing better then I did because I never really had a gf in HS.

 

2) You aren't in college right now. That is probably the easiest most natural place for a person your age to meet women. But if you feel that running your parents business is where you need to be then thats what you should do.

 

 

 

Internet dating sucks, especialy for YOUNG MEN. I would suggest that if you continue to use internet dating you think of it more as a TOOL to suplement your REAL WORLD SEARCH and not as your only hope. I NEVER had any luck with dating websites.

 

 

 

You meet girls by GOING OUT into the world and LIVING LIFE. That means meeting girls at the bank while you wait in line, or at the supermarket while you shop for food. HECK it even means asking out that cute cashier who rang you up for socks... You get the point... those pretty women you admire from afar every time you look out your window... well you go up and make CONTACT... you 1) Make friendly/flirty conversation 2) ASK THEM OUT for example "Lets get dinner tonight I know this great place" 3) You KISS THEM ect. on the date.

 

When that girl was eying you at the grocery store WHO KNOWS WHAT THAT MEANT. IF YOU LIKED HER then you should have done the 1)flirt 2)ask out 3) kiss and have fun that I outlined up above. Dude DO NOT FEAR rejection.

 

DO NOT TALK YOURSELF OUT OF ACTION. thoughts like "what if she says no" "what if she thinks I'm a creep" "what if other people hear me and think I'm a loser" SHOULD BE GONE. THINK "Well the only way she will ever say yes is if I ask" "She doesn't know me so if she thinks I'm a creep then she is a LOSER" and "I hope people hear me ask this girl out, then they will know I have BALLS"

 

Like I said you meet the girls by going OUT and LIVING LIFE. You are not doing yourself any favors if you arn't hanging out with friends and going to their parties. Because if they throw parties and are inviting you then that is a great place to meet women.

 

Also I wouldn't worry about how you look. There is no such thing as average and some girl out there is going to find you HOTTTT

 

 

 

Girls think its cute when a guy gets nervouse. Really the key is to go ahead and ASK THE GIRL OUT ANY WAY... then when you are on the date just KISS her before the night is through.

 

FINALY THE MOST IMPORTANT TIP OF ALL IS... ENJOY YOURSELF... HAVE FUN WITH IT..... IF you are all nervouse and worried about some random girl rejecting you then you will be stressed and whats the point. HAVE FUN WITH ASKING GIRLS OUT... LAUGH ABOUT IT TO YOURSELF... THINK ABOUT HOW NICE IT IS GOING TO BE TO GET YOUR HANDS ALL OVER HER... ASK MANY GIRLS OUT>.. DON"T FEAR REJECTIOn.... ENJOY YOURSELF... MAKE ASKING GIRLS OUT AND DATING GIRLS SOMETHING YOU LOOK FOWARD TOOO... GIRLS LIKE TO HAVE FUN... AND THE BEST WAY FOR THEM TO HAVE FUN IS IF YOUUU ARRRRRRRE HAVING FUNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!! YIPPPPPPY

 

 

Hahaha, best advice I've seen in a long while.

 

I would second ditching internet dating. I've never tried it myself, but it just seems too strange.

[Shakz]

Green is right, if you want a girlfriend, you simply have to try to find a girlfriend. Dude, you ain't even tryin'. You are going to be disappointed many times before you click, but you won't click at all if you don't try. Play up that "Aw Shucks" stuff. Some women find that appealing.

[Mikeyy]

Ok there are some more things I'd like to get off my chest though cause it's been making me feel like total crap lately. I will list them:

 

1. Although I help my parents with their business I have no real job. I'm helping them out of the good of my heart an expect nothing in return.

 

2. I feel like I need to go to college but I'm scared it will be hard cause I droppped out of high school in senior year and had to home school online to get my High School Diploma. Basically I don't think I'm smart enough to attend Community college.

 

3. I have no car so I'm trying to figure out how the hell can I have a girlfriend and not have a car? I'm in my 20's already and have no car or liscence, only my permit. Another thing I was suppose to do but gave up on. I can't expect me and a girl to walk or she drives me if she had a car.

 

I'm just the pure definition of a loser. A girl likes a guy with a job, car, and a future. I do the same stuff everyday. I get up in the morning, eat breakfast, watch some tv, go to run my parents business for 6 hours and make nothing, come back home, eat dinner, watch TV, and then off to bed where I start the same **** again the next day LMFAO. The more I look at myself the more I feel like a loser. Anytime a girl talks to me no wonder she ends up ignoring me. It's cause I'm boring and live a boring life.

 

I always think of what I want to happen in my life. I always wanted to date "The Girl Next Door", if you know what I mean. I always wanted a homely looking girl. Just naturally pretty and not slutty. I want to have a college life. Have my liscence and have a garbage car to drive around with the girl I always wanted.

 

People tell me now that I entered my 20's, this is the best time of my life and only comes once. But it sure as hell doesn't feel like.

 

I just wanted to get that off my chest to you guys for some help. I have no one to talk to about it either :/. I know this may sound gay cause I'm a guy but sometimes I just feel like crying and explaining this to some girl and lay in her arms and just forget all of my problems :/ I want that feeling.

[Green]

Ok there are some more things I'd like to get off my chest though cause it's been making me feel like total crap lately. I will list them:

 

1. Although I help my parents with their business I have no real job. I'm helping them out of the good of my heart an expect nothing in return.

 

If it makes you feel good then great

 

2. I feel like I need to go to college but I'm scared it will be hard cause I droppped out of high school in senior year and had to home school online to get my High School Diploma. Basically I don't think I'm smart enough to attend Community college.

 

You don't need to go to college unless you want to.

 

Getting your HS Diploma from home online is probably more work then just showing up to class. You've proved you can make yourself do the work so be PROUD.

 

Just sign up for Community college if you want to go. If its hard no shame in asking a pretty girl in your class to help you "Could you help me study for the exam?" or you could ask your professor for help or what ever. If you did the online HS thing I'm sure you can handle Community college.

 

3. I have no car so I'm trying to figure out how the hell can I have a girlfriend and not have a car? I'm in my 20's already and have no car or liscence, only my permit. Another thing I was suppose to do but gave up on. I can't expect me and a girl to walk or she drives me if she had a car.

 

Well go take the driving test. REMEMBER there are loop holes in getting ur drivers license... Like some testing locations are easier then others. Some times they even let you get away with taking a private driving course and letting the instructor sign off on you.

 

AND YOU DON'T NEED A CAR TO GET A GIRL

 

I'm just the pure definition of a loser. A girl likes a guy with a job, car, and a future. I do the same stuff everyday. I get up in the morning, eat breakfast, watch some tv, go to run my parents business for 6 hours and make nothing, come back home, eat dinner, watch TV, and then off to bed where I start the same **** again the next day LMFAO. The more I look at myself the more I feel like a loser. Anytime a girl talks to me no wonder she ends up ignoring me. It's cause I'm boring and live a boring life.

 

I always think of what I want to happen in my life. I always wanted to date "The Girl Next Door", if you know what I mean. I always wanted a homely looking girl. Just naturally pretty and not slutty. I want to have a college life. Have my liscence and have a garbage car to drive around with the girl I always wanted.

 

People tell me now that I entered my 20's, this is the best time of my life and only comes once. But it sure as hell doesn't feel like.

 

I just wanted to get that off my chest to you guys for some help. I have no one to talk to about it either :/. I know this may sound gay cause I'm a guy but sometimes I just feel like crying and explaining this to some girl and lay in her arms and just forget all of my problems :/ I want that feeling.

 

ENOUGH... DONT FEEL SORRY FOR YOURSELF DUDE

 

YOU HAVE IT GREAT.

 

GO OUT THERE AND TRY.... STOP TALKING and go DOOOOOOOOOO

 

IF you sign up for community college and fail out thats one thing... BUT YOUR JUST AFRAID OF FAILING FOR NO REASON

 

HAVE FUN.

 

OH AND DONT WORY ABOUT WAISTING YOUR YOUTH... THINGS JUST GET BETTER AS YOU GET OLDER.

[TouchedByViolet]

Mikeyy,

 

I think school is the best bet for you when it comes to meeting people and growing as a person. School offers an environment where you will meet and interact with plenty of people (hopefully one is a girl that you connect with). It will help diversify your schedule and give you the potential for various activities.

 

Don't stress out too much about school work either. Just give it a try and see if their is a major of study you enjoy. For example, if you like art no reason to take a difficult calculus class.

[Nightshades Thorns]

I totally agree w Green. I would just like to add that, to me it appears that you need to work on how you feel about yourself before you go out looking for a GF. You REALLY dont want to seek out/get a GF to validate yourself, it usually ends in an unhealthy relationship.

 

Just remember that you have to be ok with yourself, before you can expect anyone else to be.

 

Girls want emotional and physical companions, not someone that they have contantly coddle.

 

Once your on good terms with yourself.....go get em tiger!