jthorne Posted June 4, 2010 Share Posted June 4, 2010 What's a bunny boiler? Somebody that hacks people's email and facebook account? A stalker? Or is it more than that? My fiancé had to deactivate his facebook account (not that he ever used it anyway) because someone he dated kept friend requesting him using different names. He did nothing to her but stopped seeing her when it was clear she just wanted someone to take care of her financially. Is that a bunny boiler? Link to post Share on other sites
Snowflower Posted June 4, 2010 Share Posted June 4, 2010 What's a bunny boiler? Somebody that hacks people's email and facebook account? A stalker? Or is it more than that? My fiancé had to deactivate his facebook account (not that he ever used it anyway) because someone he dated kept friend requesting him using different names. He did nothing to her but stopped seeing her when it was clear she just wanted someone to take care of her financially. Is that a bunny boiler? Have you ever seen the 80s movie, Fatal Attraction? It's where the term/idea comes from, I'm pretty sure... I don't want to spoil the movie for anyone who hasn't seen it so I won't go into details. Link to post Share on other sites
califnan Posted June 4, 2010 Share Posted June 4, 2010 What's a bunny boiler? Somebody that hacks people's email and facebook account? A stalker? Or is it more than that? My fiancé had to deactivate his facebook account (not that he ever used it anyway) because someone he dated kept friend requesting him using different names. He did nothing to her but stopped seeing her when it was clear she just wanted someone to take care of her financially. Is that a bunny boiler? -------------------- When I think of "bunny boiler", I think of the movie: Fatal Attraction with Michael Douglas, Glenn Close. Link to post Share on other sites
BB07 Posted June 4, 2010 Share Posted June 4, 2010 Interesting thread! It got me to thinking about if I have ever had those tendencies. I thought back to a long, long time ago and I think I did do a little bit of the bunny boiler thing once, nothing major......but in my defense I was very young and naive and this guy deserved what he got and more. When my ex hubby and I broke up, I had thoughts but I didn't act on them. During the affair with my stbdmm, I had a few thoughts now and then out of frustration but I never acted on them, nor would I. As for the behavior of his stbxw, definite bunny boiler behavior. Link to post Share on other sites
califnan Posted June 4, 2010 Share Posted June 4, 2010 And can we keep this on topic without all the religion thrown in? I don't believe this term is even in the bible. ---------------------- My post was right-on. Lack of faith in the future. God holds the future. (So report me.) Link to post Share on other sites
ladydesigner Posted June 4, 2010 Share Posted June 4, 2010 ---------------------- My post was right-on. Lack of faith in the future. God holds the future. (So report me.) Please explain because I'm confused by this. Isn't being a bunny boiler a reaction to something else that caused them pain? It would be maybe obsessing about the past and present while making themselves and others crazy. I always have faith in the future regardless of how I am being treated in the present or have been treated in the past. Just trying to understand how the two go hand in hand. (BTW I am not trying to be disrespectful in any way just trying to understand:)). Link to post Share on other sites
fooled once Posted June 4, 2010 Share Posted June 4, 2010 ---------------------- My post was right-on. Lack of faith in the future. God holds the future. (So report me.) Sorry, not my style to report. My POINT was instead of turning every thread into your belief in God and religion, which this forum isn't for, stay on topic. And as you have been told many times and read, MANY here don't believe in the same God as you do. So continuing with the preaching is only IMHO disrupting the the post and not following the guidelines which state, in part : Interact in a manner conducive to free-flowing, collaborative participation from all visitors, fostering an environment free of harassment, character attacks, and other forms of individual and group berating Link to post Share on other sites
Silly_Girl Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 ----------------- There was no other way to explain obsessing or vengeance excepting for lack of faith. Genuine question - does having a faith mean denying that mental health issues or psychological cruelty exists? Link to post Share on other sites
BB07 Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 Let's get back to the bunny boiler stuff......plssssss. It's lots more interesting. Link to post Share on other sites
BB07 Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 Since Califnan mentioned Betty Broderick, now that is a perfect example of a real bunny boiler. Dangerous and deadly. For more info go here. Link to post Share on other sites
jthorne Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 Since Califnan mentioned Betty Broderick, now that is a perfect example of a real bunny boiler. Dangerous and deadly. For more info go here. She was a nutjob. Totally unstable. But was she that way before her marriage, or did her H drive her nutty? Dunno, but I think we're all ultimately responsible for our actions. Link to post Share on other sites
califnan Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 Since Califnan mentioned Betty Broderick, now that is a perfect example of a real bunny boiler. Dangerous and deadly. For more info go here. ------------------ It was a terribly interesting story.. With her attny husband divorcing her, and marrying a younger woman - she felt extremely humiliated.. All of the obsessive things she did up to slaughtering them in their bed - could have been avoided with faith. The part 1 & 2 movie version with Meridith Baxter Birney, were very worthwhile.. Could her life had been better with faith - absolutely .. Link to post Share on other sites
BB07 Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 I just read this story about Betty Broderick. If what I read is true.....her husband gas-lighted her in terrible cruel ways and he had the means to do it as he was a lawyer and knew all the legal ways to do it. Of course I'm not saying that what she did was justified in any way but I think he did drive her mad. Link to post Share on other sites
Spark1111 Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 And what I remember about her was that her love for him was obssessive in the extreme! I read that 85 percent of all homicides are caused by jealous, whether it be over a SO, or someone's promising stach of drugs. THAT'S A SOBERING THOUGHT. While we have all had some extreme thoughts following a trauma, acting on those thoughts is a different animal all together. I believe it is mental instability that was there way before the last stressor ignites it. Link to post Share on other sites
jthorne Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 I just read this story about Betty Broderick. If what I read is true.....her husband gas-lighted her in terrible cruel ways and he had the means to do it as he was a lawyer and knew all the legal ways to do it. Of course I'm not saying that what she did was justified in any way but I think he did drive her mad. I'd agree with that. I think he was very cruel to her. But she was still responsible for her actions. There have been other women treated far more cruelly than her, but they were able to rise above it. They took responsibility for their own lives. If Betty became a bunny boiler, she did it because of herself, not from anything done to her, IMO. Link to post Share on other sites
pureinheart Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 ------------------ It was a terribly interesting story.. With her attny husband divorcing her, and marrying a younger woman - she felt extremely humiliated.. All of the obsessive things she did up to slaughtering them in their bed - could have been avoided with faith. The part 1 & 2 movie version with Meridith Baxter Birney, were very worthwhile.. Could her life had been better with faith - absolutely .. Now I remember that movie...a Lifetime movie. Well after what you and I have been through we could have lived without our faith. I have had people in general try to make me crazy, but in the end, it's up to us and agree CN without God...dealing with these people would have been much more difficult Link to post Share on other sites
califnan Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 I just read this story about Betty Broderick. If what I read is true.....her husband gas-lighted her in terrible cruel ways and he had the means to do it as he was a lawyer and knew all the legal ways to do it. Of course I'm not saying that what she did was justified in any way but I think he did drive her mad. --------------------- Betty credits herself with helping him through law school.. Then many years later I think he hooked up with his secretary.. The humiliation that followed with all that goes with the divorce including isolation...Betty went crazy and even lost her children and their respect.. Finally she shot her husband and his wife in their bed. There is a lot to be said for what the betrayed spouse suffers in a divorce.. I was lucky, my husband and OW had reduced me to a vegetable, made me feel I was the one at fault and in the way - so I never thought of killing them. ha But certainly people can see when they get to the other side of adversity, that there is a light at the end of the tunnel - that is for sure.. Betty went off, would not see there was a future - now she is in jail. Link to post Share on other sites
pureinheart Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 Now I remember that movie...a Lifetime movie. Well after what you and I have been through we could have lived without our faith. I have had people in general try to make me crazy, but in the end, it's up to us and agree CN without God...dealing with these people would have been much more difficult Correction...we could not have lived without our faith Link to post Share on other sites
skylarblue Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 I almost started a thread last week that I think I’m becoming a bunny boiler after (unbeknownst to MM) I drove to and parked across from his house just to watch his W return home with the kids from school. I swear I feel like A is literally making me crazy. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 I swear I feel like A is literally making me crazy. Honestly maybe you really should think about stopping the affair then.. What you did is bunny boiler kind of stuff... what is next.. and it isn't the affair making you crazy it is the fact he is married to someone else and in a relationship with that person and not you..In other words.. being the outsider isn't easy Time for some introspection... Link to post Share on other sites
RedDevil66 Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 I've shared this before but will again for this thread. My ex of 11 yrs cheated on me for a year. Left, then came back. Then his OW confronted me to tell me she had hiv and my ex knew it all along and slept with her for 15 months UNPROTECTED! Then would come home to me and do the same. My life became PURE hell from this point! He left me, destroyed our business we worked 8 yrs to build, took all the money out of our accounts, told me he didn't have to give me a dime etc. Him and his HIV GF played the sickest games with me. Then found out his sicko GF had be followed by a PI 6 months before he left me, she would stalk my house, befriend my friends, she even had our phones tapped. She is bunny boiler extreme. What did I do after all the horrible things they did to me, I walked away and never looked back. Someone with serious emotional and mental issues would have gone "bunny boiler" on these two. I can relate to Betty Broderick in that her H and his OW were two sicko f*cks who played with her mind like my sicko ex did. Of course I was hoping my ex would "get his" but I never would waste my life or one second getting revenge. My life is worth so much more. But Betty was driven to insanity. She deserved more, but her H and his OW, got what she felt they deserved. No one can drive you nuts without your permission. Link to post Share on other sites
RedDevil66 Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 oh and to add, she ended up giving my ex HIV and he married her after that (who else would). I was HIV free and guess who lived happily ever after?! Link to post Share on other sites
califnan Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 I've shared this before but will again for this thread. My ex of 11 yrs cheated on me for a year. Left, then came back. Then his OW confronted me to tell me she had hiv and my ex knew it all along and slept with her for 15 months UNPROTECTED! Then would come home to me and do the same. My life became PURE hell from this point! He left me, destroyed our business we worked 8 yrs to build, took all the money out of our accounts, told me he didn't have to give me a dime etc. Him and his HIV GF played the sickest games with me. Then found out his sicko GF had be followed by a PI 6 months before he left me, she would stalk my house, befriend my friends, she even had our phones tapped. She is bunny boiler extreme. What did I do after all the horrible things they did to me, I walked away and never looked back. Someone with serious emotional and mental issues would have gone "bunny boiler" on these two. I can relate to Betty Broderick in that her H and his OW were two sicko f*cks who played with her mind like my sicko ex did. Of course I was hoping my ex would "get his" but I never would waste my life or one second getting revenge. My life is worth so much more. But Betty was driven to insanity. She deserved more, but her H and his OW, got what she felt they deserved. No one can drive you nuts without your permission. ----------------------- You've been through hell with those two, and you deserve the best.. To walk away from all of that was quite a Feat. The total destruction that my H and the OW did to my life (incl attorneys) -and with fraud and theft - adversely affected my sons as well - with his last will denying them their grandfather's estate. These divorces are Bad News.. Could well understand why the judge had to throw the book at Betty - otherwise others would do it. Link to post Share on other sites
califnan Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 oh and to add, she ended up giving my ex HIV and he married her after that (who else would). I was HIV free and guess who lived happily ever after?! ---------------------- Hallelujah ! Link to post Share on other sites
bentnotbroken Posted June 5, 2010 Share Posted June 5, 2010 oh and to add, she ended up giving my ex HIV and he married her after that (who else would). I was HIV free and guess who lived happily ever after?! Sweet Jesus. I have to admit that is in the top 3 things that angered me the most about Mr. Messy and OW. Neither of them having regard for my life. Neither caring that my children could have been left alone if we all had contracted AIDS. I do believe that those who do things like this don't realize, or just don't care, that usually the evil they set out to trap someone else with, usually ends up being their own death trap. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts