How important is education in your SO?

[Confusedalways]

In an effort to not completely derail other threads, I have to know everyone's take on this.

 

I currently have a BA and plan to go for a masters... and I would expect my date to have at least a bachelor's. I don't really think that's superficial or selfish at all. A lot of people in my family haven't achieved this amount of education so I understand that it doesn't make a person smart or stupid or whatever, but I would simply want someone with the commonality of having gone to at least 4 years of higher education.

 

I am interested to hear how important it is to otheres. Is it an age thing? I know that when I'm online dating, the first thing I check (after their picture) is their education, is that so awful?

[EasyHeart]

Education isn't important to me, but intelligence is. I've met brilliant, clever women who never went to college and boring dumbasses with graduate degrees. (I have a grad degree, so education was very important in my life).

 

I think people often make the mistake of equating intelligence with degrees. There is no correlation between the two.

[thegoodlife]

I agree with EasyHeart. Education isn't important to me, as long as they are intelligent and still have a drive to accomplish something in their lives.

[bluewolf17]

[FONT=Arial][sIZE=2]I think we all know that there are plenty of unintelligent people walking around with bachelors and graduate degrees. But, in my opinion, having a degree does say something about you.

 

Personally, I wouldn't exclude someone that I really liked, because they didn't have a degree, but that would be the exception.

[/sIZE][/FONT]

[VertexSquared]

There are plenty of smart girls out there, and I do think education is important, but I would never make it a dealbreaker if someone didn't have a Bachelors from a good school. That being said, though, I *do* find that I tend to get along better with those who came from good schools (higher correlation of commonalities, senses of humor, goals, etc), but it's not like I'd reject someone if their educational background differed. A woman that isn't intelligent = instant dealbreaker for me, no exception. I don't care how good the sex is under such a circumstance.

[kiss_andmakeup]

I definitely place more value in general intelligence, social capabilities, and common sense than in formal education. My boyfriend has his bachelor's but it's not from anywhere fancy.

 

As someone who was given a full ride academic scholarship but dropped it to go to beauty school, I can always appreciate following your passion over doing what other people expect of you.

[Sivok]

Education is fairly important to me. It gives us alot to relate to and to me an independent, intellectual woman is very attractive. My last gf didn't go to school and couldn't hold a job. However, what bothered me most is I felt like I was trying to relate to a middle schooler whenever I tried to have even a minimally intellectual conversation - like say current events. However, social intellect is extremely important -if not more important- to me as well

 

Oh well ,confused, it looks like we'd never work then! I don't have my bachelor's yet as I'm in a 6 year double major program in Computer/Electrical engineering with 18 months of internship as well. Looks like I'll have to stop sending you those sleazy messages on those dating sites!

 

[norajane]

Education is important to me.

 

A lot of people in my family haven't achieved this amount of education so I understand that it doesn't make a person smart or stupid or whatever, but I would simply want someone with the commonality of having gone to at least 4 years of higher education.

 

Most of my family has not gone to college, and I agree that education doesn't make a person smart or stupid. There are plenty of educated dumbasses and uneducated but intelligent and clever people out there. Still, I agree with you that it does give points of commonality and a shared experience. It also indicates that you had the same view on future life direction and the significance of education in your lives.

 

What is more important, though, is understand HOW they went through college. Did they get into the idea of learning, was it primarily a credential they needed for the next steps in their lives, or did they just party all the way through and don't ever pick up anything to read? And does this match your experience and the significance you place on it?

 

Personally, instead of "education", I'd rather there be check boxes for Reads a Lot for Pleasure, Reads Sometimes for Pleasure, Reads the Sports Section, or Reading? Why Would I Want Read Anything?

 

I used to date a guy (college educated) who used to irritate me to no end because he didn't understand that when I was sitting and reading, I was "doing something", and that I was doing something I enjoyed and looked forward to finding the time to do. He didn't last long.

[phineas]

education isn't as important as intelligence to me.

However I married a woman who held a common cubicle clerk type job & am now paying out the back side in child support because I make so much more than her.

 

Before that I pretty much paid for everything while she had very little to contribute to the marriage financially.

 

I probably won't ever marry again, but I would probably live with someone again.

However, that person would have to have a job near my pay level & not have a mountain of debt because I have no desire to support another woman.

 

I need a partner that can afford her %50 of the living expenses.

[VertexSquared]

Education is important to me.

 

Most of my family has not gone to college, and I agree that education doesn't make a person smart or stupid. There are plenty of educated dumbasses and uneducated but intelligent and clever people out there. Still, I agree with you that it does give points of commonality and a shared experience. It also indicates that you had the same view on future life direction and the significance of education in your lives.

 

What is more important, though, is understand HOW they went through college. Did they get into the idea of learning, was it primarily a credential they needed for the next steps in their lives, or did they just party all the way through and don't ever pick up anything to read? And does this match your experience and the significance you place on it?

 

Personally, instead of "education", I'd rather there be check boxes for Reads a Lot for Pleasure, Reads Sometimes for Pleasure, Reads the Sports Section, or Reading? Why Would I Want Read Anything?

 

I used to date a guy (college educated) who used to irritate me to no end because he didn't understand that when I was sitting and reading, I was "doing something", and that I was doing something I enjoyed and looked forward to finding the time to do. He didn't last long.

 

Very true -- HOW people went through college is a huge deal. Plenty of people just went to college on their parents' dime and partied the whole time. I saw this quite a bit at my school, and it's a well-known institution.

 

Smart girls are so hard to find... I am holding onto my current gf for dear life, haha. I can make the nerdiest jokes and she legitimately finds them funny -- her sense of humor is very similar to my own as well, and we get along famously.

[TaurusTerp]

Very important. No college education is a dealbreaker for me.

 

That said, I certainly don't need a fancy school or anything...just something to show that the girl has an education beyond high school. I understand that not everyone can afford a 4 year degree at a fancy private school.

[Crazy Magnet]

Intelligence is more important to me than the number of degrees someone has. However, I would feel awkward dating someone who did not at least have a bachelor's (I've got 2 BA, 2 MA, and I'm working on the PhD). In academia, I find it hard to bring someone into that social setting who hasn't been to college at least and who doesn't highly value education. It's an unnecessary stress on the relationship. I tried it once and it was so hard on the guy that the first question everyone asked was "Where did you graduate?"

 

That said, I come from a highly educated family and it is more or less expected that we will date someone similar. My dad has a JD, mom had her MA, my sibling and cousins on my dad's side have their MA or are working on it (in fields like aerospace engineering) and on my Mom's side 3 cousins have or are graduating this year with PhDs all from prestigious schools (again, in freaky stuff like aerospace engineering). So yeah, talk about a geeky family. I'm like the family dumbass since I avoided engineering. Too much math.

[OpenGL]

For a woman, a man's education and intelligence level is irrelevant. If he has money she doesn't care how smart he is or what he does.

 

Have you ever heard of a drug dealer who didn't have a harem of women?

[norajane]

For a woman, a man's education and intelligence level is irrelevant. If he has money she doesn't care how smart he is or what he does.

 

Have you ever heard of a drug dealer who didn't have a harem of women?

 

Most of us aren't crack-ho's, so yes, education and intelligence are relevant.

[Feelin Frisky]

Education isn't important to me, but intelligence is. I've met brilliant, clever women who never went to college and boring dumbasses with graduate degrees. (I have a grad degree, so education was very important in my life).

 

I think people often make the mistake of equating intelligence with degrees. There is no correlation between the two.

 

A big ditto to you EasyHeart.

 

Education is a big nothing because modern events have changed everything in ways the current establishment hardly knows. It now amounts to training in Trivial Pursuit and ancient hero worship. What would make me most happy is a woman who is not a product of academia but one that is astute, able to uptake and connect dots fairly and above all gets my sense of humor. I don't want any sort of competitive relationship or a girl that resents my own independent mind.

[Crazy Magnet]

For a woman, a man's education and intelligence level is irrelevant. If he has money she doesn't care how smart he is or what he does.

 

Have you ever heard of a drug dealer who didn't have a harem of women?

 

 

hahaha this is a joke post....right?? You ever try talking to a brick wall for months on end?

 

I'm sure crack whores don't care how smart he is, they are after the crack not his witty banter.

[jackson30]

If I was starting over and dating I would say yes, it's very important. There are of course exceptions, but on average people with college degrees make more money, live longer, and are happier.

[yah]

Education and intelligence are very important, whether they are the same or not. I expect the person I am with to have at least a BS and have above a certain income. Nothing outrageous but more than average. I find it sexy! Most of my relatives have at least one grad degree so I don't think a bachelors is all that much even. FWIW I'm halfway into my PhD program.

[carhill]

I know that when I'm online dating, the first thing I check (after their picture) is their education, is that so awful?

 

At your age, it's not 'awful', it's your preference. I interface with college graduates every day and I can respect your preference. I also know, being old enough to be your father, that education is no guarantee of positive and healthy life outcomes. I've known and dated many ladies who are far more educated than I, hoping to find a level playing field wrt intelligence and creativity. TBH, it's been a mixed bag. That said, reversing the genders, I can see your methodology, since a man's role in society is different than a woman's and expectations for him are different. Times are far different today than when I was an engineering student back in the 70's, as are employment opportunities for men.

 

I'd say stick to your plan and make it work for you. It's your path. Walk it

[Shakz]

To me, the prospect of a long-term relationship with an uneducated woman is low. I've found that people with college degrees simply see the world differently than people with high school diplomas. I'm not particularly well educated (bachelor's degree from a public university), but trying to have an intelligent conversation with a high school graduate about anything other than day-to-day affairs is very difficult. They have a tendency to adopt views that are popular no matter how ignorant, or subscribe to wild theories that have no basis in reality. Of course, this isn't true in every case, but I get tired of playing teacher.

[marsle85]

I will be achieving my doctorate, and -will- not date anyone who does not atleast have their Master's/PhD... or could atleast provide a significant contribution to our income. In both cases, the debate of "intelligence" and "smartness" rings true. I work very hard to earn my degrees and maneuver myself into a profitable, enjoyable lifestyle- I expect the same in return... and most importantly: my diligence will provide me comfortable lifestyle, will his?

[Shakz]

I will be achieving my doctorate, and -will- not date anyone who does not atleast have their Master's/PhD... or could atleast provide a significant contribution to our income. In both cases, the debate of "intelligence" and "smartness" rings true. I work very hard to earn my degrees and maneuver myself into a profitable, enjoyable lifestyle- I expect the same in return... and most importantly: my diligence will provide me comfortable lifestyle, will his?

 

Well, there you go. I would be intimidated to date a woman with your amount of education, not simply because your earning power might surpass my own, but because you would be so much more experienced at critical thinking that I wouldn't be able to win a single argument.

[jackson30]

Since when do women use critical thinking to logic to win arguments?

[Feelin Frisky]

To me, the prospect of a long-term relationship with an uneducated woman is low. I've found that people with college degrees simply see the world differently than people with high school diplomas. I'm not particularly well educated (bachelor's degree from a public university), but trying to have an intelligent conversation with a high school graduate about anything other than day-to-day affairs is very difficult. They have a tendency to adopt views that are popular no matter how ignorant, or subscribe to wild theories that have no basis in reality. Of course, this isn't true in every case, but I get tired of playing teacher.

 

A bit unfair, nay? There is an order one accepts in higher education in which obedience comes at the price of yielding development of sometimes interesting, sometimes wonderful unique identity. Perhaps a woman or man values that and sees that as a key to taking their own route--finding themselves first, then when they're sure of an interest or talent pursuing either though continuing ed, self-ed or re-matriculation at some time when they are firm and secure and not just on an institutional series of assumptions that all education squashed into one linear time early in life automatically equates to happiness and success.

 

Especially with this sh** economy, it can come down to who know or who you blow to get the top positions. Generalizing about people is simply prejudice that shows limited insight. Sorry.

[VertexSquared]

marsle85:

 

I would like to note that college is EXPENSIVE and not everyone can attend grad school.

 

I went to an Ivy League undergrad school -- so I only have a BS -- but had to pay my way through with little financial aid, for example. Lathering on more school would just be so expensive. I would hope that if I were to try to date anyone with a Masters/etc, they would see the hard work ethic and intelligence as a plus.

 

Of course, I could say the same about undergrad, obviously. Not everyone can attend undergrad, either, but I suppose this does not necessarily mean they'd still be compatible matches to those that could. Personally, I came out of undergrad and almost immediately found work that is now paying me six figures a year out of school -- I'd feel very conflicted if someone still "looked down" on me for not having had a certain degree even if everything else in life is going well.

 

I'd be curious to see how certain statistics relate between undergrad and grad schools... I know the jump is pretty massive from high school, but I suspect there are somewhat significant diminishing marginal returns past that point.

 

Anyways, my point is that education does correlate to a lot of other demographic factors that are likely conducive to compatibility (intelligence, work ethic, lifestyle, financial background, attitudes, etc), and I am more likely to find success among those who share those traits with me, but again I consider the end-traits to be the important factors and not necessarily the "indicators" of said traits.