Am I just asking for to much??

[scottishlassy]

I just received this e-mail from my STBXH. Here is the back ground. He cheated on me, says he was just flirting. I have explained this all in a previous post. We went to mediation to try and work things out. I am asking for child support and spousal support. (He makes about $700 more a month than I do.) The difference in our 401K's and vehicle values is about $2788.

 

I have thought about things and have discussed the situation with

three different attorneys. I know you won’t like either option, but

please think things through.

The more amicable option is that we proceed with the plan that the mediator

was working on up until spousal support was brought up in the end. I

am currently prepared to make a payment of $2,788.00 to you upon final

divorce documents being signed. That is the difference between the

value of vehicles and our 401(k) plans. I will continue health care

coverage on D and continue the $450.00 monthly child support with

no spousal support.

If this option seems unacceptable to you, I will contact my attorney

on June 30th to move forward as necessary going along with the

mediation plan with the exception that you pay my attorney’s costs. If

this happens, the probably outcome is that you will owe me for fees

over the amount of $2,788.00. My attorney’s retainer is $3,500.00 and

does not include all court costs.

Please think about this. The first option would be much more

beneficial to us both. I would much rather see that. If I hear nothing

pertaining to which option by 11:00am on June 30th I will know what to

do.

 

Now, I did an initial consultation with a lawyer and she said that $300/month for 5 years is very fair (we have been married for 17 years). She also said that there is no way I could ask that he pay my attorney fees so how in the heck can he ask that I pay his attorney fees? I make less money than he does. He is the one that cheated, he is the one that wants the divorce and I'm the one that is going to have to pay? Need some advice here!

[SummerLady]

I just received this e-mail from my STBXH. Here is the back ground. He cheated on me, says he was just flirting. I have explained this all in a previous post. We went to mediation to try and work things out. I am asking for child support and spousal support. (He makes about $700 more a month than I do.) The difference in our 401K's and vehicle values is about $2788.

 

I have thought about things and have discussed the situation with

three different attorneys. I know you won’t like either option, but

please think things through.

The more amicable option is that we proceed with the plan that the mediator

was working on up until spousal support was brought up in the end. I

am currently prepared to make a payment of $2,788.00 to you upon final

divorce documents being signed. That is the difference between the

value of vehicles and our 401(k) plans. I will continue health care

coverage on D and continue the $450.00 monthly child support with

no spousal support.

If this option seems unacceptable to you, I will contact my attorney

on June 30th to move forward as necessary going along with the

mediation plan with the exception that you pay my attorney’s costs. If

this happens, the probably outcome is that you will owe me for fees

over the amount of $2,788.00. My attorney’s retainer is $3,500.00 and

does not include all court costs.

Please think about this. The first option would be much more

beneficial to us both. I would much rather see that. If I hear nothing

pertaining to which option by 11:00am on June 30th I will know what to

do.

 

Now, I did an initial consultation with a lawyer and she said that $300/month for 5 years is very fair (we have been married for 17 years). She also said that there is no way I could ask that he pay my attorney fees so how in the heck can he ask that I pay his attorney fees? I make less money than he does. He is the one that cheated, he is the one that wants the divorce and I'm the one that is going to have to pay? Need some advice here!

 

450 a month for child support better be for 1 kid, that is wayyy low...2 kids where I live 375 a kid and that is with the supporting spouse paying the full medical benefits and I do not live in a rich well to do place. I know the salary is a factor but 450 is low unless you have 1 child. I did not get alimony but even if I did my lawyer said child support is seperate issue.

 

The 401k is so low I can't imagine that is huge factor..

[scottishlassy]

450 a month for child support better be for 1 kid, that is wayyy low...2 kids where I live 375 a kid and that is with the supporting spouse paying the full medical benefits and I do not live in a rich well to do place. I know the salary is a factor but 450 is low unless you have 1 child. I did not get alimony but even if I did my lawyer said child support is seperate issue.

 

The 401k is so low I can't imagine that is huge factor..

 

The $450 is for just one child. I live in Oregon.