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My family used to be perfect. Now it's like we're trash or somthing.


Amygirl186

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My family seems sort of messed up right now.

 

My dad stopped working. Apparently he is working on projects, but my mother and i don't see them going anywhere. Because of this we are sort of poor now. We live in a tiney apartment and we used to live in a four storey house. My mother is sad and she's gained weight because of it. And now she yells all the time. My dad is sad too and has taken up drinking. He gets drunk and then he's mean. He's not abusive or anything, but he's mean and not helpfull. It's hard for me to do my school work, and then my bad greads get my parents even more upset and angry at me.

 

I want to fix somthing. I want to bring my friends over my house after school, but i can't because my parents havn't set it up yet and we've been here since october. Now i don't really have friends anymore because i don't hang out with anyone. I'm embarrassed to b/c i don't want anyone to know about my family.

 

My family used to be perfect now it's like we're trash or somthing.

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oOsweetkissesOo

Don't be embarassed! It's not your fault! If someone is making fun of you for it or would make fun of you for it just let it fly right out of your ears..don't pay attention to all the rude people out their who have no clue what it's like to be in your shoes!

 

You said you wanna do something about it..well it seems as if you are always trying to do something about it. It's not you, it's your parents!

 

Don't feel embarassed :o

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I'm sorry I missed this earlier Amygirl.

 

When I got divorced....my children's life changed drastically. Due to their Dad leaving and only myself to support them, plus take care of all the bills left behind....we went from living in one of the best houses in town....to much LESS! At first it was a very rough and we were ALL horrifed and humiliated. To add to that.....they missed their Dad and didn't even hear from him for seven years. I had to leave them alot to work endless hours to pull us out of the hole and move them into some halfway decent place to live.

 

I said all that to say this.....sometimes life just sucks. It twists this way and that way....leaving lots of people feeling frustrated. The financial problem your family is facing.....may or may not be your parent's fault. The drinking often comes with it. Unfortunately, you are stuck in the middle of it all.

 

The best thing you can do is focus on what YOU want to accomplish in your OWN life and take the steps to make it happen. Draw out what kind of house you want, what kind of vehicle you want, what kind of career you want....and make a plan. It will help divert your attention when you feel your life is so impossible now.

 

Make a mental note on how heavy drinking doesn't solve problems....and don't turn to it as you get older. Stay away from anything or anyone who would divert you from the goals you have set for yourself and your future family.

Other than that.....there really aren't any clear answers. I don't know if talking to your parents about this would help or not. Maybe you could try though.

 

Please keep posting to let us know how things are going for you!!!

 

Hang in there Honey...

Arabess

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this stuff really does help.

What you said about concentraiting on my goals really puts some things into perspective.

But when you said about stearing away from people who will divert me from my goals, it hit me that my boyfriend often does divert me. Not on perpouse, but he makes me really sad a lot because he's indisisive and one minute I feel he loves me to death and the next I feel he doesn't care at all. I don't know if i should break it off or not. I'm scared to.

 

Lastly, I want to tell you how much i admire women like you who are strong enough to pick up the peices after your husband leaves. The thing that amazes me the most is after all you've been through, you still have the time to make me feel like I still have a little hope left. Thanks for all you've said. I'd love to keep talking to you. You must be an awsome mom.

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