KochinoPWR Posted February 2, 2004 Share Posted February 2, 2004 Ok, this is sorta a teen problem and I feel more comfortable asking adults what to do cause teens are not experienced and not knowledgeable, but here goes.... We've bee together for 6months and it was a lovely relationship, but there were two sides to the story. I was not with her because of that puppy love crap, I wanted to be with her for the LONG RUN, but to her she thought she wanted to be with me but the little puppy love ran out... we didn't do anything, no sex, no bad stuff at all... and when schol came around again, she left me in a month... she said it didn't feel the same, the kissing and emotional feelings weren't there... now of course I felt heart-striken! She couldn't tell me why the feelings went away, so I spent like 3 months figuring it out myself through grievance and all!! I went to her friends and all, but they didn't know what's up... she tells them she feels so much better without me... that was a hurtful thing to say, I never done wrong! So as the days went by I began to get over the pain and more into the thinking phase... I'm the type that wants to know KNOW! To fully analyze the situation, she lost the puppy love for me because I was there most of the time, but I could not change that since we got 4 classes together! So it was inevitable! But to everyone that knows this situation tells me that she was aiming for the wrong thing, she doens't know what love is, she thought she did... She has to learn that it wasn't about the kisses and all, it's something more! Duh! But she's sorta... "slow" cause she has no influence of relationships around her, you know? Anyways, long story short, she spoke to her friends lately (only her good friends, other she'd lie to) saying that she's confused and she doesn't know what to do about me, she misses me, but half wanting, half no-no. She doesn't know what to do about me, and I've put an obstacle on her by not talking to her one bit, I'm not making it any easier for her to get to me, but if she really knows what love is and if she does truly love me... she'd come around no matter what! That's my point I wanna prove to HER. But the problem now is that it's been like 4 months ever since our departure and I feel...... plain. I don't care. I'm not phased by her right now... I feel like I don't care, I half want her and half not ready... Now what do I do, what's most likely going to happen? Please someone tell me, someone who's experienced... thanks so much guys, this would help ALOT! Link to post Share on other sites
Asthenia spikes Posted February 2, 2004 Share Posted February 2, 2004 well there... all i could say its to talk to her, tell her how u feel and how u wanted and ask about her feelings... and show how much u care n love her... well thats all i can say... good luck n take care Link to post Share on other sites
silk_sword Posted February 2, 2004 Share Posted February 2, 2004 well i think u r rightfully confused. look, do u truly know what love is? i still don't to this day. i feel that she is just as confused as u. unfortunately, she left u. this is the problem, because she may just be coming back due to loneliness. in addition, u seem fairly apathetic (not caring too much) at this point in time. i think u were upset because it was your first love, your first love and loss. is this the case? if u truly feel something for her, then approach her. if u r unsure, then wait and see what happens. that way u can get a better grip on your emotions. don't simply wait for her, because u believe that she needs to make the first move. stubborness is not healthy in any relationship. it hinders them. but, before u decide that u love this girl, think about how young u r. if u don't know what love is, how do u know this is it? and now especially that u r getting over this, it seems that you were simply couping with ordinary heartbreak. maybe it is best to let this go and explore new possibilities. u r young, don't get caught in hassle. if u do find that u truly love her at any time, then yes pursue it with all your heart and soul. but, if u feel that this is not the case, then live and experience other things life has to offer. the best of luck to u. (keep your chin up) Link to post Share on other sites
dyermaker Posted February 2, 2004 Share Posted February 2, 2004 I can't tell whether you want to be told what you want to hear, or what you need to hear. I've never really been good at the first one. You can't teach her to love you, I know that you want to. The thing is, she's just a kid, just like you. I'd be a hypocrite if I said children are incapable of love. But it's not something you think you have, you definitely know it. And you definitely cannot MAKE someone else feel that. She doesn't love you, she's not ready, and you can't change that. Silk says that you should pursue it with your heart and soul; however, one-sided pursuit is unhealthy (and very much unalluring) Link to post Share on other sites
silk_sword Posted February 2, 2004 Share Posted February 2, 2004 Silk says that you should pursue it with your heart and soul; however, one-sided pursuit is unhealthy (and very much unalluring) dyer - i just meant since she seems to want him now. dyer is very right! if u come to find she doesn't love u, then there is no point. u can't force a person to love u. that just isn't how life or love works. dyer - y is hentai so disgusting? (j/k) Link to post Share on other sites
guest Posted February 2, 2004 Share Posted February 2, 2004 don't wait for her to make up her mind -- stand up for yourself and find someone new. Date lots of people before making a commitment to one. Link to post Share on other sites
KochinoPWR Posted February 2, 2004 Share Posted February 2, 2004 Hey, I thank all you guys... and let's be honest here! I DO want her back and I DO want her to love me... and at this point, you're all right in saying that I WANT HER TO LEARN LOVE FROM ME. That's very true, but I think it was best to let her come to me, cause honestly, I'm not being stubborn or scared, I want to see if she really does feel for me, if not, then boo-hoo for me... and to answer the whole "See Other people" thing... I have, and it's not working for me... I may be young, but I'm not stupid, let's say it like that. My parents have been through hell and so have I... my life I want it to be set, and I see that she looks at me a few... and I see that she's TRYING to have fun... but to be honest, I gotta clear my mind and focus on my work now... she's becoming distracting and she will bring me from my work... So I've decided to put her aside until I clear my transcript up! Thanks a million and I'll keep you posted if anything happens!!! Link to post Share on other sites
silk_sword Posted February 3, 2004 Share Posted February 3, 2004 great mind set - it seems u have it all in order - stay on track and stay strong! Link to post Share on other sites
Asthenia spikes Posted February 3, 2004 Share Posted February 3, 2004 well dun bro... ur my hero... lol yes thats wat i want to do wif my gf as well... i want to show her how to love n all.. coz i do want her even tho shes dun all sort of stuff that torment my battled soul... but is still love her heaps n i want her so bad Link to post Share on other sites
KochinoPWR Posted February 4, 2004 Share Posted February 4, 2004 You know it's pretty tough to manage my school life, I semi-want her now... I miss her and I want her, but I Q myself and say "Why do you want her??" I don't know, I'm confused myself now... but Seeing her LESS in school helps me out a BUNCH! I hardly think about her in school and I don't do much to acknowledge her... but sometimes I dream about her and wake up feeling like crap... I look at her in the halls and before school and she's like... I don't know, to my eyes she seems lost and confused... that's what her friends tell me too... I try hard not to think about it, but what can I do??? I don't know if I want her back... I sorta don't care, but when I say I don't care anymore, something inside of me just slaps that saying and makes me think "She's a special person, you wanna give THAT up???" I don't know, it's a confusing situation, but right now she's having her "fun" So I gotta let her... and I'll hope for the best. Link to post Share on other sites
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