Captain Nemo Posted February 2, 2004 Share Posted February 2, 2004 I think I've met the perfect woman for me. We really understand each other when a great majority of the world misunderstands us. We make each other laugh all the time when we're around each other. We want the same things out of life. There's a STRONG physical attraction between us. The problem? Our life situations make it impossible for us to be together. I won't go into all the reasons why we can't be together but one of the main ones is that we'll most likely be moving away from each other soon. We've known each other for a few months and have quickly become good friends. It'd be pointless to start anything when we're going to be split apart anyway (neither of us believes in long distance relationships.) The dilemma isn't "do I make a move?" It's "I can't make a move (cause it'd be pointless) so how do I keep myself from driving myself mad thinking about what it'd be like for us to be together?" Link to post Share on other sites
Arabess Posted February 2, 2004 Share Posted February 2, 2004 Well....unless one or both of you are married ....why can't you talk about it with her and see if you can't find a compromise? Link to post Share on other sites
guest Posted February 2, 2004 Share Posted February 2, 2004 Well, just keep telling yourself that its a temporary thing, make some memories to treasure and when you part keep her as a fond memory. If you two really were meant to be together, you would not be pulled apart -- so console yourself by knowing that it just was not meant to be! You will find someone else who you will be even happier with and so will she. Link to post Share on other sites
Captain Nemo Posted February 3, 2004 Share Posted February 3, 2004 The thing is, there is no real compromise to be made. If we move away from each other, a long distance relationship would be the only option which neither of us believe in. Considering this fact, it'd be pointless to talk about it--especially since we haven't crossed any friendship lines yet. It'd be the worst thing for us to talk about it and realize we really want to be with each other only to then realize we can't do anything about it. I think I'm trying to savor every minute we're in each other's company because I know our days are limited. I don't really believe that there's only one person in the world out there or anything. With her though, I wouldn't be surprised if I had to meet another million people before I met someone I could relate to the way I get along with her. The problem is, I'm not going to meet a million people throughout the course of my life. I might not meet another 10,000 people the rest of my life. I don't believe in the "if you were meant to be together" theory either. I just feel like we could be perfect for each other--it's just our life paths only came together for too short of a time. Maybe if we met a year ago, things would be different. It's just hard to let go of something that you thought you'd never get that you almost had. It's like winning the lottery and finding out you only have a week left to live. It's cool but it's not. I'll console myself by thinking that at least I've MET the perfect woman for me. That may be more than what many people can claim. Link to post Share on other sites
CuriousKitty Posted February 3, 2004 Share Posted February 3, 2004 What could b more important than a love such as this? Link to post Share on other sites
Captain Nemo Posted February 3, 2004 Share Posted February 3, 2004 If only things were that simple. In order to be together, one of us would have to give up our life goals, at least for a while. I wouldn't want either of us to have to do that. I'm also realistic in that we're not actually together so I don't know for a fact that we'd be perfect for each other. Everything I've seen so far indicates that we would be though. If we had been able to get together, even for a while, and things were as great as I think they'd be, I'd be willing to give up a lot for us to be together. To answer your question, nothing is more important than that type of love. Perhaps I'm able to keep from throwing everything out the window to pursue this because it's something I never expected to find. Our friendship means a great deal to me too and that's another thing I'd have to risk. Link to post Share on other sites
wiseOLDman Posted February 3, 2004 Share Posted February 3, 2004 You could always just stick needles in your eyes Nemo. Is this so much of a binary relationship that moving away means cutting off the friendship/relationship? You said you've not moved beyond the friendship stage. Why can't you stay in touch and see if the fondness grows? Long distance relationships may not be preferential, but I certainly wouldn't walk away from what might be some day. There are no hard and fast rules in love. Link to post Share on other sites
Captain Nemo Posted February 4, 2004 Share Posted February 4, 2004 Originally posted by wiseOLDman You could always just stick needles in your eyes Nemo. Is this so much of a binary relationship that moving away means cutting off the friendship/relationship? You said you've not moved beyond the friendship stage. Why can't you stay in touch and see if the fondness grows? Long distance relationships may not be preferential, but I certainly wouldn't walk away from what might be some day. There are no hard and fast rules in love. I intend to maintain the friendship if/when we move away but I think you missed my point. The problem here is that I want to say or do something but there is nothing to be said or done. A part of me though wants to just end the friendship once we move away. It'd almost serve as a recurring reminder of what I could have had whereas just having memories wouldn't be so bad. Speaking from a purely practical aspect, wouldn't keeping in touch almost be out of morbid curiousity just to see her eventually end up with someone? Once we're done with our career stuff, we're probably not going to end up living in the same area of the country. It'd be a bit weird to suggest that either of us move to the other's city just cause we're such good friends. Link to post Share on other sites
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