rockstarmusician Posted February 4, 2004 Share Posted February 4, 2004 I have had about enough of my parents. I'm 18 years old, and well, I live with my parents. They are way too overprotective of me. The reason I'm still living at home is because well, it's free, and it's close to my school. But the problem that I have is that when I want to go out and have some fun, it's not possible. They always want to know where I'm at and who I'm with and what I'm doing. I love my parents with all my heart, but it's just come to a point where I feel like I'm almost "trapped". Any suggestions? Comments? Link to post Share on other sites
Errol Posted February 4, 2004 Share Posted February 4, 2004 Either move out on your own, or accept the fact that your parents are doing this because they love you and don't want you to be hurt, or taken advantage of, or get into trouble. The are NOT doing this to make your life miserable--that is the last thing that they want to do. As long as you are living with your parents you may as well take advantage of their wisdom and experience. Believe it or not -- it's not so different from your own and their rule may have saved you from something terrible already -- you just don't know it because it didn't happen! Thank them. Love them. Respect them. It may be that the things you feel you are missing out on, are things that are actually better missed out on! Link to post Share on other sites
crysiet Posted February 4, 2004 Share Posted February 4, 2004 I can see how that can be frustrating. You are already a legal adult and they shouldnt be treating you the same as when you were in highschool. Have you tried talking to them about it? That might help. Link to post Share on other sites
wiseOLDman Posted February 4, 2004 Share Posted February 4, 2004 Parents can't simply turn off the light switch when a child reaches their 18th birthday. Children need to understand that good parents have spent the better part of 19 years doing everything in their power to protect, educate and prepare their child for adulthood. Be patient with them. Understand that they're not really trying to stiffle your life. Sit down with them and come to an understanding of their boundaries and yours. Negotiate the ones that don't overlap. Recognize that the parent/adult child dynamic IS different when the adult child is still living at home versus out on their own. Link to post Share on other sites
Author rockstarmusician Posted February 5, 2004 Author Share Posted February 5, 2004 See, I know they're doing this to protect me, and I thank them for that. I really do, but it's to a point where I need some room to grow and make mistakes. That's the only way I'll be able to learn. I don't want to have to live by my parents rules all my life and wonder what would have really happened if I did this, or that. I'm not stupid. I'm not 12 years old. I'm 18, I'm more mature than a lot of 18 year old's. Link to post Share on other sites
HokeyReligions Posted February 5, 2004 Share Posted February 5, 2004 Originally posted by rockstarmusician See, I know they're doing this to protect me, and I thank them for that. I really do, but it's to a point where I need some room to grow and make mistakes. That's the only way I'll be able to learn. I don't want to have to live by my parents rules all my life and wonder what would have really happened if I did this, or that. I'm not stupid. I'm not 12 years old. I'm 18, I'm more mature than a lot of 18 year old's. All you can do is to talk to your parents and show them that they can trust and respect you. You are living in their home -- free -- so you must abide by their rules. You might say you are mature for 18, but your post doesn't sound that way--you talk about living with your parents all your life--do you really think you will? Do you think you'll be 50 years old and still living with them? You can grow and experience life whether you are living at home or not--think about what you are experiencing right now. You are learning how to deal with your parents on an adult level. The way you handle yourself now will translate into future relationships (friends, co-workers, lovers, etc.) Be patient and keep communicating with your parents and reach some compromises--you might not get everything you want exactly the way you want it, but it will be a start. Sometimes parents need a lot of proof from their kids and sometimes they need a very little -- it depends on your past relationship with them. Have you ever given them reason to not trust you? It takes a long time to earn back trust at any age. If you have not given them any reason to doubt your personal responsibility and decision making skills then that gives you something you specific you can use in a conversation with them. Link to post Share on other sites
TheFaithfulWife Posted February 5, 2004 Share Posted February 5, 2004 When I was about twenty three I worked at Orchard supply hardware stores with a girl named Kim Dunham. Her dad would call her each night to make sure she had a ride home from work( she couldn't afford a car and was working to save for one) I was one of the people who gave her rides. She always got annoyed that her dad would make such a big deal out of it. Well one Friday night she didn't have a ride and decided to take the bus just outside work, it was in full view of a McDonalds restaurant and across the street from the police dept. Witnesses later said that a white van pulled up and opened the passenger side door, and the guy told her to hop in. She did.. What they didn't know was that he had a gun pointed at her, and the door obstructed their view of this. The white van was stopped by police4 days later on the road to Santa Cruz California for speeding, the man in the van jumped out and pointed a gun at the cop who then shot him. Kim Dunham was in the back, dead, strangled and nude. I now have 5 kids of my own, do I ask them where they are going? who they are with? when they will be back? You're damn right I do! We live in a dangerous world these days, and it would be nice to know the last person your kid was seen and when, if you should ever come up missing. By the way, Kim had just had her 20 th birthday three days before she disappeared. Be grateful your parents care The Faithfulwife Link to post Share on other sites
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