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How much is enough?


Feather

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How much is enough?

 

I've pretty much made myself sick analyzing this situation.

 

I've been dating this guy for 3 months. We both work alot and live about 30 miles from each other. Although, my work is 10 minutes from his house. We only see each other once a week, sometimes less.

 

We don't date other people although one night he told me I could. I asked him if he wanted to date other people and he said no.

 

I'm not sure if this is a relationship or if this guy is playing with me. On the nights we don't talk, I just wonder if he's with other women. He's 29 and I'm 26.I know he's been in a couple of long relationships, but he told me he had never been in love. I think this is scary.

 

I want to lay the cards on the table and figure out what is going on, but I'm not sure how to approach it. I've asked to see him more, but there never seems to be enough time.

 

Any advice would be great because I'm just so confused.

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if you really want or need to know the best thing is to have a talk with him, wheres this going etc. try to find out how he feels if he doesnt want to make it more then maybe hes not as serious as you?

XALYSABETH

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My opinion is that if this guy was really into you, he'd want to spend more time with you. If he was very into you, he's want to spend every minute with you. No matter how busy a person is, they can always find time to do what they really want to do. That's what life is all about. I wouldn't look for a lot to come out of this. A talk won't do any good. He'll only give you some BS line he wants you to hear. If he's not making you feel special in his life, get rid of him and find somebody who will.

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I saw him last night for the first time in 2 1/2 weeks.

 

He says "I'll make more time for us, I missed you so much, we will start planning for more time" blah, blah blah..................

 

I REALLY LIKE him and I understand he's a workaholic, but I can't help but take it personally.

 

I am tired of worrying about it though. I guess if he's the one everything would click and we would spend every moment we could together, right?????

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I don't know if you would spend every minute together even if he is the ONE. A lost of guys will need some alone time, just like a lot of girls do. I see my current gf once or twice a week and it is perfect for me. We have only been dating for 1 month so, but I'm going to ask her how she feels about the amount of time we have been spending together. Assuming she is okay with it, we'll probably keep it like this for now.

 

You have now had this talk with your BF and he has indicated that he is going to try to take more time for your relationship. If he doesn't live up to his promise, then you should either be willing to live with it the way it is or break up with him.

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Some people require less of an investment of time in a relationship. I don't want to see anyone daily either.

 

Maybe you should enjoy the time you DO have together for awhile and see what happens. If you mention it too much....he could get nervous. If he's 29 and never been in love....there's a good chance that committment scares him a little. Give him some space and time.

 

If what he does want to give to the relationship is not enough to make you happy though.....then you'll have to decide if this relationship is right for you.

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I know I should be happy with the time we do get to spend together. He got really defensive when I mentioned us spending more time together. He said he doesn't want to rush into anything. I totally agree, but the trust level is difficult.

 

Here's a new twist on the relationship! Has everyone else made plans for V-Day? I just mentioned something about it today. I asked why all these hearts, chocolate and red filling the grocery stores? He laughed and said he didn't know then changed the subject.

 

I hate Valentine's day anyhow because it would have been my 6th year anniversary with my ex. This new guy doesn't know this. I don't know. Does this seem strange or am I acting like a 2 year old?

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