Star Gazer Posted July 11, 2010 Share Posted July 11, 2010 (edited) ...he has recently gotten out of a LTR... I'm floored that no one has asked for more detail about this. How long were they together? When did it end? Who ended it? Why? This has so much bearing on this situation it's not even funny. Maybe just be bad timing. Edited July 11, 2010 by Star Gazer Link to post Share on other sites
CLC2008 Posted July 11, 2010 Share Posted July 11, 2010 I'm floored that no one has asked for more detail about this. How long were they together? When did it end? Who ended it? Why? This has so much bearing on this situation it's not even funny. Maybe just be bad timing. Yes, it happens. But maybe the two people can still be friends... Link to post Share on other sites
harmfulsweetz Posted July 11, 2010 Share Posted July 11, 2010 you have evidence of ONE thing - he's into the sex. consider taking the sex out of the equation and see if he's still interested in making time to see you - for you - every weekend. he either wants you, for you - or you for sex. which one is it? one way to find out... Yep, you should definitely try the above. If you want commitment, you may not get it off this guy who has already expressly stated that he won't give you that, regardless of the reasons behind it. It's not the cause you should be concerned with, but the outcome. In the end, you aren't getting what you want, but he is getting exactly what he wants without the commitment. Is that okay with you? You like him, for now you are happy to accept whatever you can get from him, I get that. I've done that before too. You know how that story ended? Me alone, him exclusively dating another girl. For someone who wasn't able to give me what I wanted, he sure as hell gave it to another girl. That's life, it's up to you whether you want to push for what you want, and only settle for that and nothing less, or whether you'll accept whatever scraps he throws you. Right now he's not dating anyone else, but give it time-and he may be. Link to post Share on other sites
sugarmomma Posted July 11, 2010 Share Posted July 11, 2010 It sounds like he doesn't feel the need to give more at this point since he is getting his sexual and emotional needs met. However, your needs for security are not being met. Now whose needs are more important? Yours or his? Link to post Share on other sites
Author LostInLA Posted July 12, 2010 Author Share Posted July 12, 2010 I bit the bullet and had a long talk with him. I tried my best to express how I have been feeling since last week and now we are on the same page. We are exclusive but taking things slow still. I was fearing that he was just dating me just to date someone and that he had no intention of anything from ever going further, however he said he would like to see where this goes and that it's not like he doesn't want it to go any further in the future which eased my mind, he's just trying to sort out his life and doesn't want to complicate things more with rushing into a serious relationship. Also, we are now exclusive. Yay! Link to post Share on other sites
Star Gazer Posted July 12, 2010 Share Posted July 12, 2010 I'm floored that no one has asked for more detail about this. How long were they together? When did it end? Who ended it? Why? This has so much bearing on this situation it's not even funny. Maybe just be bad timing. Can you answer these questions? Regardless of your "exclusive" status, the answers would shed a lot of light on the situation... Link to post Share on other sites
Author LostInLA Posted July 12, 2010 Author Share Posted July 12, 2010 How long were they together? When did it end? Who ended it? Why? This has so much bearing on this situation it's not even funny. Maybe just be bad timing. Can you answer these questions? Regardless of your "exclusive" status, the answers would shed a lot of light on the situation... I had asked him more details as I had only a general idea. It was for 3 years, she ended it about 6 months ago, but they were out of love for a year. Link to post Share on other sites
Star Gazer Posted July 12, 2010 Share Posted July 12, 2010 I had asked him more details as I had only a general idea. It was for 3 years, she ended it about 6 months ago, but they were out of love for a year. Makes sense then. You started dating him only 3 months out of that relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LostInLA Posted July 12, 2010 Author Share Posted July 12, 2010 Makes sense then. You started dating him only 3 months out of that relationship. Yes, which is understandable why he wants to take things slow and not rush into anything, plus it's probably good for me and for us as well. I just wanted some assurance that this has some potential and that I'm not someone he's just having fun with until he meets someone else or whatever. Link to post Share on other sites
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