thank you tony

[sara]

tony, if i never believed in miracles, i do now. ya see i posted a "internalizer" post yesterday and you responded. as i was reading it so many memories came flooding back it was almost overwhelming. i remembered how i use to get yelled at or in a fight with my sisters or brothers, i'd leave the house crying and upset and hurt. i'd walk around the neighborhood pretending that i found out that i was adopted and my "real" family "finally" came and got me or my "real" dad, (not my moms boyfriend) found me and took me home with him to this big wonderful house far far away. i realized how often i had lived in my own fantasy world cause as you said reality was too painful. tho i was never physically abused, there was very little affection, or i love you's, or love, or anything good running around in my family. it was all hate, anger, animosity, and me being blamed for being spoiled rotten, and mommy's "baby" and my sisters seemed to hate me literally for it. i can still hear there voices in my head. i can't believe one time, one of my sisters, told me that she too felt adopted, that she thought "this cant be my family!" i was surprised to hear that from her cause she was the "goody goody" of the family, she went to school, worked, didn't drink, smoke, or run around. i was shocked to hear that she felt that way. she is the one i hated growing up the most. now she is the one i talk to mostly and get along with the best. strange how time changes things. well as i was reading your post, i realized i still look at the world out of the eyes of that scared, sad, mad, frustrated, needy, young preteen. i have pictures of sitting on my moms lap and remember holding her hand as we walked down the street, so i guess there was some love earlier in life. but as we got older it all stopped, i'm sure at our own discretion,i don't think my mom just automatically withdrew her affection from us, al thought i never remember hearing her say "i love you" . well that is all i wanted to say. today i woke up and remembered all this, and i now feel like anewed. i laughed at my boyfriend and talked to his this morning too through my "new eyes". thank you tony, after years of counseling and years of hiding, with one little sentence off a message board, my life has been given back to me, one i never had. i hope i can keep this in my memeory and always remember that i see the world through adult eyes now not child eyes. how can i thank you? with greatfullness and gratitude, sara.

[Tony T]

Dear Sara:

 

I am overjoyed that I was able to help you and I hope you realize that your journey to recovery now has just begun. Your realizations have put you on a path of healing that you must take minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day. You now have hope for great happiness ahead.

 

As for thanking me, that really isn't necessary. But if you must, how about giving me some good numbers for the $50 million Florida lottery drawing Wednesday!!!

[sara]

ah, o.k. how bout 19 24 25 41 43 13

 

those are the ages of my kids my b'f myself and my dog. did i say i was 42? i forgot im 43. i hope this ginko biloba kicks in soon....lol thank you again, tony. from my heart, thank you!

Dear Sara: I am overjoyed that I was able to help you and I hope you realize that your journey to recovery now has just begun. Your realizations have put you on a path of healing that you must take minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day. You now have hope for great happiness ahead. As for thanking me, that really isn't necessary. But if you must, how about giving me some good numbers for the $50 million Florida lottery drawing Wednesday!!!