Thinkalot Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 It's changed a bit over the years, and will change a bit more, but I think you are basically right Curt. Link to post Share on other sites
longlegzs80 Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 I have seen the change over the years where women ask out men. But too, it is all about how much confidence you have in yourself and being aggressive to get what you want. Some women would have no problem going up to a guy to talk or to ask them out, but then some women who might not talk to you might be afraid that your not truely interested or that you might be attached. So, alot of the times I think it has to do with how confident someone is about themselves and how much they want to take a risk. Those women might not care if you reject them because they can go to the next guy if that is how they are. Link to post Share on other sites
Arabess Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 The bottom line is this: When women see a good looking guy, such as yourself, she figures you have LOTS of options and if you are interested....you will let HER know. It surprises me all the time between people who DO have options and maybe those who don't play theirs.....that the latter seem to have better luck. I don't have any other way of putting it.....but I'm sure you know what I mean. I've approached guys FINALLY who I was interested in....and them tell me that they wanted to ask me out but figured I had all these guys hit on me all day. That may be true...but the ones I WANTED to hit on me....DIDN'T! HAHA. In your case, I think you will have to make the first move......only because women will do the assumption that you have 20 in the wings. And you do. Just 20 YOU DON'T WANT!!!! TFF! Hang in there my friend........ Arabess Link to post Share on other sites
Author UCFKevin Posted February 8, 2004 Author Share Posted February 8, 2004 20 I don't want? Okay, this thread has been a gigantic confidence booster, seriously wasn't what I was going for, but hey, whatever, I'll take any compliments I can get. Anyway, I dunno, I guess I'm modest, but I couldn't possibly think that a girl would be intimidated by me because they think I'm too good looking. That's BEST case scenario, but it seems a bit out there to me. I have always wanted to have the guts to go up to a guy that I find truely attractive, but I have the thoughts in my head like maybe he is taken, maybe he is cocky which is such a turn off, maybe he would not be interested in me. Hey, those are the SAME damn thoughts in guys heads. It could potentially be just as much as a waste of time for us to go up to a good looking girl as it would be for you to go up to a good looking guy. Ahhh well. I guess I'll just have to suck it up and go all the work. Hell, what more should it take than just, "Hey, I'm Kevin, I saw you earlier and wanted to meet you." And I'm not exactly subtle about checking out a girl I'm interested in, so they should damn well know I'm a lookin'. And perhaps I oughta pay more attention to see if I AM being checked out. I have been told I never see it before, like at the mall or whatever, so...we'll see. Link to post Share on other sites
Arabess Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 The bird that SEE's and THINKS ABOUT the early worm......doesn't do the honors! Swoop....scoop......and pluck that worm right up......to get the benefit! Link to post Share on other sites
Darkangelism Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 i kinda had a girl approach me last night, it was my birthday on friday and me and my friends were at this bar last night celebreating it, and one of my friends went around and told people that she knew that it was my birthday, so later this girl comes up to me and tells me she heard its my birthday and that she thinks im cute* and wants me to go to this club downstairs and give me a lap dance, so well i am piss-ass drunk and am like ok(i would have gone anyway prolly), unfortunatly i lost her in the crowd and didnt see her again, oh well, i know she lives in my building... * i just wanted to make a comment on the word cute, in my mind it is a less strong word then hot,beautiful or handsome, anybody else agree?(btw i am more then just cute ) Link to post Share on other sites
reasontosigh Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 If it makes you feel better, Darkangelism, I have also been called "cute". Sure I wouldn't mind "hot" or "beautiful" myself, but I do realize I'm no supermodel, so "cute" works just fine for me. It sure beats being referred to as simply "all right" or any one of a number of lesser alternatives! Link to post Share on other sites
Author UCFKevin Posted February 8, 2004 Author Share Posted February 8, 2004 I always equate cute with puppies and babies. Link to post Share on other sites
carla Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 Coming from a womans view point cute is a good thing. When I refer 2 a guy as being cute it more or less means he is good looking. Hot meaning he's got a sex body but not necessarily that good looking, he could be ok in the looks department but still have a hot body. Besides you guys don't want to be oogled for your bodies do you? You want to be admired for your minds right? LOL Link to post Share on other sites
Vivid_29 Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 Women aren't just gonna throw themselves at you. They may act uninterested, but they really are. You just have to pay attention to their body language and watch for signs. ~V Link to post Share on other sites
Author UCFKevin Posted February 8, 2004 Author Share Posted February 8, 2004 How about they just hold up a sign that says, "Hey! I'm interested!" I just wanna be oogled, I don't care what it's for! Link to post Share on other sites
waikikimann Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 Dude how could you not know that u look good? I think you are just trying to get girls to say they think ur hot Link to post Share on other sites
Pia2004 Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 We, in Spain, approach guys, and they like it... I have noticed in the States that it is the contrary...as soon as I got into a bar, guys would turn around and check me out...in Spain, that is women's job... Nevertheless, I think the ancient female-chasing that the man has to make is much more practical. And girls like it as well. I personally find it cut ewhen a guy does the chasing...it shows his weaker-romantic side, and it's cute. I would def never approach a guy who is hanging out with abig bunch of buddies...just because I think guys can never be theirselves (weakly romantic) when theis "manish" buddies are around. Good lukc! Link to post Share on other sites
Darkangelism Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 Originally posted by carla Coming from a womans view point cute is a good thing. When I refer 2 a guy as being cute it more or less means he is good looking. Hot meaning he's got a sex body but not necessarily that good looking, he could be ok in the looks department but still have a hot body. Besides you guys don't want to be oogled for your bodies do you? You want to be admired for your minds right? LOL When you meet people they cant see ur mind. So having a hot body, and being good looking is helpful, but lucky for me i have that, and i have the mind to match so I have step two under control. Link to post Share on other sites
Author UCFKevin Posted February 8, 2004 Author Share Posted February 8, 2004 I'm SERIOUSLY not trying to get complements at all. In my mind, I think I'm pretty good looking, but I also know that everyone has their own opinion, girls could think I'm cute, they could also think I'm merely eh....I never ever assume things, that'd just be stupid. I'm not everyone's cup of tea. Anyway, booze usually helps when I'm at a bar or a club, I have absolutely no problem going up to a group of girls and striking up conversation. I just gotta work on NOT needing booze to do that. Link to post Share on other sites
Iamhappy Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 Consider me amused. Kevin - as you wish. I've been ogling your picture for the last 5 minutes and you've just been upgraded from super cute to hot. There I've said it. And with a collective sigh, the women of Loveshack swoon, "He's dreamy." Link to post Share on other sites
Author UCFKevin Posted February 8, 2004 Author Share Posted February 8, 2004 Aww shucks... Confidence boosting...self esteem rising....I'm ready to go out now! So what do you folks think is a good way to notice when a girl is checking out a guy since they're so covert about it? Just to pay attention better? Link to post Share on other sites
MarKus Posted February 8, 2004 Share Posted February 8, 2004 Originally posted by meanon Young women in social situations tend to signal their interest in a number of ways the most common of which is repeated glances: looking at you, looking away when you look at them, looking back again etc. A series of glances like this is often a clear signal of interest. That happened to me last night, i was in a club/bar with my mates, and there was this one girl stood not far away talking to her friends. every time i looked in her direction, she would be giving me lots of eye contact, then i when i looked back at her, she would turn and give me more eye contact. I liked it! i should have approached her. dammit! Im like you kev, im usually to stupid to realise when some girl is interested in me, sometimes i dont have the courage to approach them, even when shes giving me these good vibes with eye contact. So girls when a gal gives a fella lots of eye contact is she definatly interested Link to post Share on other sites
morrigan Posted February 9, 2004 Share Posted February 9, 2004 I asked out both of the boyfriends that I've had relationships with. If I liked a guy, I felt it was a waste of time waiting for him to ask me out. I'm extremely shy in public, and both my bf's were shy as well. I figured I would just take a chance, if they weren't interested, all well. But if I was going to ask a guy out, I'd do it in a situation where he was by himself for a moment, not huddled with all of his buddies. Guys feel the same way, I figure. A lot of girls still expect men to initiate. They think it's embarassing or unfeminine to make their interest in a guy 100% clear. Some girls enjoy being pursued. But if a girl likes you, she will give you looks, toy with her hair, her body slightly facing you. She might walk past you once or twice. Just go up and say hi. If she acts interested, great, if she ignores you or plays games, she's probably not worth your time. As far as the looks, the idea that good looking people get swamped with dates is bull. I was an ugly duckling until I turned 18, then within a year I was suddenly considered "beautiful". (I apologize for sounding like a egomaniac). Both guys I've had relationships with said they were afraid of asking me out, they figured they didn't have a chance with me, that I had a bf or that I'd be mean or laugh at them. So if doesn't matter if someone is really gorgeous or not--if another person thinks they are, they might figure they don't have a chance in hell. Link to post Share on other sites
monkey00 Posted February 9, 2004 Share Posted February 9, 2004 Originally posted by Vivid_29 Women aren't just gonna throw themselves at you. They may act uninterested, but they really are. You just have to pay attention to their body language and watch for signs. ~V vivid, thats almost true, altho i wish it'd be easy to read women...but to tell ya the truth it's not all that easy most of the time, such as mixed signals esp. and on another part, being physically cute/handsome/hot does not immediately make you attractive, w/o the confidence and with the nice guy routine you can be as unattractive as anybody else out there. the problem with hot guys and girls is that usually they are intimidating to ppl of their opposite sex. either they think they're taken, out of their league, or has high demands. so far this year i met 2 extremely cute/hot girls, to be honest they are intimidating with first impressions....after awhile of being around them i broke the ice and foudn out underneath their looks, they're just about as cool and normal as the rest of us. BTW, those 2 cute girls i met happened to be very shy unless approached, since they have a shy side to them...they're not much of a conversationist. and i found out that those 2 arent taken!! omg (my opinion is cause they intimidate others, thus not a lot of ppl are wiling to approach them) (as an end result they become shy ppl and possibly single too! which of course is a benefit to me!) see, goes to show that hot guys/hot girls are as normal and faithful as anyone else out there underneath their looks. Link to post Share on other sites
Dug Posted February 26, 2004 Share Posted February 26, 2004 I guess it depends on what you're looking for....a one night stand.....a conversation...a relationship....but...if you go clubbing and if post 1980's women are there, you'll leave with someone. It's not even a challenge. I get propositioned all the time, and I am no great piece of work....just plain vanilla. Women have become alot more aggressive in the past 2 decades.....although some of them also carry serious baggage and head problems. Personally, I have never been one to look for "anything" at the bottom of a bottle, so bars aren't cool in my opinion anyway....too much role play going on there. The courage afforded by the internet has in alot of cases replaced the liquid courage of alcohol. Good Luck Link to post Share on other sites
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