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What's wrong with me....


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I realize from another forum that I communicate on that I ask stupid questions. This forum is a graphic design forum that I ask various questions because I am a very curious person. And they along with majority of the people on the shack know me all too well with just asking various questions and so on. I starting to think maybe I should just not talk at all, or type for the most part until I don't ask stupid questions and be intellegent.

 

Why does the stuff that people say about me which is sometimes very negative effect me so much. I let things get to me I know, but I really feel so stupid when I talk to other designers on this forum by posting questions and then they respond. Anyways, how do I change my ways of not being so negative all the time and be alittle more intellegent in my responses?

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There is nothing wrong with you. Nothing. If you have questions then ask them, you don't get anywhere keeping everything inside. Don't change the way you are for anybody. Your negativity will go away when you find something that can make you happy. As for intelligence, you do seem intelligent,very intelligent.

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I never see you as asking stupid questions--I love how when you ask questions, you care about the answers--that's something that you need to do to earn my respect on a forum.

 

As for taking things personally, caring a lot about the opinions of others--I'm the same way. Sometimes people don't realize that you are concerned about that, and it does hurt sometimes.

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Your not stupid maybe inexperienced but not stupid. Experience comes with age.

The only stupid thing you could do is not ask questions, questions are your stepping stones to experience. Keep asking your questions cus were listening. :)

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You're far from the dullest knife in the LoveShack drawer. Some folks could learn fom your humility. You're absolutely fine in your thread behavior. And the fact that you're not a "know it all" makes you refreshing.

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Geez. I'm like you- I worry what people think! But you are great..smart and interesting, and honest. Really don't worry about what people on a forum may think! I can understand though, cos I sometimes worry what people on here think of me!! :o

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Originally posted by Thinkalot

I sometimes worry what people on here think of me!! :o

 

 

You shouldnt, we are random people on the internet, we are most likely never going to meet you, i mean i guess its possible...cause i will be meeting somone from here(i wont say who, ill let them do it if they feel its appropriate). But we are for the most part nonjudgemental. We fight, have conflicting views, but at the end of the day we don't go to sleep thinking boy she said something real stupid. So don't worry what we think... i know its easy to say and harder to do, but thats all i can do besides a demonstration.

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Thanks everyone from your compliments. I was not really looking for anyone to make me feel better, but thanks anyways. IT did help. I just don't understand sometimes, that when I speak I don't sound too intellegent, it is only by what I type. And people on this graphics forum just from what they call, "weird" thread questions seem to make me feel like I ask stupid questions. That I am not intellegent and I was wondering how can I be intellegent whether I am communicating out loud or on the computer?

 

Too, I find people to not understand me. If I am alittle different from their group of people, they then ignore me or say stuff that kinda hurts. And yes, I do take things to heart. I can't help it. That is why too I come on this forum. EVeryone here makes me feel so comfortable asking various questions. And too, I am very inexperienced and people who are in the field of graphic design don't seem to want to bother with someone who is just curious about various things in the biz.

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I honestly don't really think there are ANY stupid questions on this forum. The whole "My boyfriend cheats on me with porn" stuff gets old, but otherwise, I wouldn't really say anyone on here asks or says stupid things.

 

You're AOK in my book, LegZ.

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Originally posted by longlegzs80

they then ignore me or say stuff that kinda hurts.

 

 

They are A-holes

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I realize from another forum that I communicate on that I ask stupid questions. This forum is a graphic design forum that I ask various questions because I am a very curious person.

 

What kind of questions are you asking? Questions solely related to graphic design? Are the people there aware that you are new in the field and are learning?

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longlegzs80:

 

There is hardly ever such a thing as a stupid question, if you really desire the answer. Ask what you want to know however you need to ask it.

 

Forget about the people who say you ask stupid questions, or other negative things. There will always be people who are going to take the time to try to help you, and answer all of your questions to the best of their ability.

 

Focus on THOSE people.

 

Please do not stop asking questions :) I may not have a reply to every one but I personally enjoy reading what you and many other members have to say.

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The people on this graphic design forum I go too know I am inexperienced and I just ask various questions cause I am curious and interested about the field. And I ask approapriate questions for someone who is still learning. They all know this. I have been on that site about as long as I have been on this one. So, the people know me pretty well.

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Computer help forums are difficult. I would say that a HUGE number of veterans of computer help forums has a huge elitist stick up their ass.

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There is a saying that 'you are what you THINK you are'. Perhaps you assume other people share the same negative feelings about you as you feel about yourself. Chances are, people aren't AT ALL seeing you in the same light you are casting upon your own self....in your own mind.

 

I'm not sure which direction you should go in...in order to bi-pass or change the way you feel about yourself. Insecurity is a big issue. Other people HAVE over come it though. I believe you can as well.

 

Why don't you try focusing on what you DO like about yourself, read some web sites which address this issue and try to get some help. It seems to cast this damnable grey cloud on your whole life....which isn't fair.....because you are a wonderful person. It's robbing you of all potential happiness. Fight it!!! Be determined to win!

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Originally posted by dyermaker

Computer help forums are difficult. I would say that a HUGE number of veterans of computer help forums has a huge elitist stick up their ass.

 

LOL dyer!

 

Arabess, that is great advice. It is so true. I'm fighting stuff too LL...you will get there, as I am.

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longlegzs - a bit behind on my reading, just saw this. HUGE amount of ego found amongst graphic designers, they're a lot like computer geeks, always trying to 'one up' everyone else by knowing stuff. Take what you can from what they tell you and ignore the insults, most of them just can't help themselves. Maybe it has something to do with their work being subjectively judged all the time, lots of insecurity there. Try flattery rather than humility, maybe you'll get them to grace you with their vast, powerful knowledge (lol).

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I agree with ARABESS. I feel like people are judging me negatively just like I think of myself as negative. I know I should fight it, but there are alot of things I need to fight and I just can't get the motivation to fight them.

 

My biggest thing is I need to move out. Just plain and simple. I would see a change in my attitude. I love the freedom. No one to answer too. Can come and go as I please without questioning.

 

I know my mom cares about me alot as much as she doesn't show it other then helping me out money wise. But she needs to cut the embilical cord. I have yet told her about this new guy and very hesitant to tell her because she is going to question and I don't want to hear it. I can't believe at the age of 22 I feel like I can't have a life of my own.

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OOOPPPs, I love how I respond and it totally does not go with the thread. Anyways everyone knows how I feel.

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WOW, this new guy. He is something else that is for sure. Very very kind, sweet, gives me compliments that I find hard to take, just an overall nice guy. He wants me bad, and the women at work say the same thing. He is planing on after our first dinner date and if we both like eachothers company that after some time we would travel, do some camping, swimming, all outdoors stuff which I love.

 

He is very interesting. I just don't understand why still. Wouldn't he want a women whose experienced life alittle? I am sure not it. But, I am giving him a try. I am interested, but act very very shy around him. And with what the other workers say, he has come in quite a bit to ask about me, and they also mention that he gets truely excited when he talks about me for some odd reason. I will keep everyone posted though.

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Dont keep wondering why, just go with the flow for a while and enjoy it (easier said than done for us thinkers...but give it a go! :D )

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