RedCherries Posted July 22, 2010 Share Posted July 22, 2010 My sister is 21 and I'm 26. we got along well when we were younger but when she turned 16 she started become really hostile towards everyone in my family, not just me. Everyone chalked it up to her being a teenager. Cue to 5 years later and it's only getting worse. She gets offended really easily and loves to leave the room dramatically. She'll talk back to my parents but is way worse to me. I've never heard her apologize. Ever. I've never heard her admit she was wrong. I can't start a conversation with her without her becoming angry within 20 minutes. She is so insensitive and I wonder if there is something wrong with her. Just today she came into my living room. We had just dicussed yesterday how she thought I was so selfish because I was going to move out again (long story) and I said well at least you have the living room to yourself to which she angrily replied that she never spent time there. So today I jokingly said "I thought you never spent time here!" To that she BLEW up again and snapped at me. The point is, its getting increasingly harder for me to say anything to her. What do I do? I lost my temper today (I usually try to keep my cool) but I can't take it anymore and I screamed at her. She just said coldly "you are so dumb." What is wrong with her? Is it me? It can't be... She does this to everyone. She also fights with her boyfriend all the time. I can honestly say they argue everyday. Link to post Share on other sites
PortuguesePrincess80 Posted July 26, 2010 Share Posted July 26, 2010 Sounds like your sisters either depressed or has a huge chip on her shoulder. If shes like that with her bf too..then I'd say shes depressed. I simply wouldnt feed on it. Just ignore..thats all you can really do since shes family..lol Link to post Share on other sites
chucksbabygurl17 Posted August 22, 2010 Share Posted August 22, 2010 My sister is 21 and I'm 26. we got along well when we were younger but when she turned 16 she started become really hostile towards everyone in my family, not just me. Everyone chalked it up to her being a teenager. Cue to 5 years later and it's only getting worse. She gets offended really easily and loves to leave the room dramatically. She'll talk back to my parents but is way worse to me. I've never heard her apologize. Ever. I've never heard her admit she was wrong. I can't start a conversation with her without her becoming angry within 20 minutes. She is so insensitive and I wonder if there is something wrong with her. Just today she came into my living room. We had just dicussed yesterday how she thought I was so selfish because I was going to move out again (long story) and I said well at least you have the living room to yourself to which she angrily replied that she never spent time there. So today I jokingly said "I thought you never spent time here!" To that she BLEW up again and snapped at me. The point is, its getting increasingly harder for me to say anything to her. What do I do I lost my temper today (I usually try to keep my cool) but I can't take it anymore and I screamed at her. She just said coldly "you are so dumb." What is wrong with her? Is it me? It can't be... She does this to everyone. She also fights with her boyfriend all the time. I can honestly say they argue everyday. its not you i am 18 n my sis is 20 but she is a mean person my family dont like her at all she dosent respect anyone not even herself just a couple of months ago she got me n my boyfriend kicked out of our house bc she started a fight with me n it got fizicale n one thing led to another her boyfriend got into it n so did mine n she is really bad into drugs n she does gots alot of issues she needs to deal with cuz the way she is going now she is not goin to have noone in her life n noone to blame for her mistakes i tryed to talk to her severl times but she just dosent want to hear it well my point is dont go to her n dont try to understand yet bc when the time is right she will come to u bc she is going to wake up in realize that nobody likes her n nobody wants to be around her bc the way she acts twordes other people n your family trust me nobody can stay mad forever cuz everybody needs somebody to lean on. Link to post Share on other sites
Shannyn Posted August 23, 2010 Share Posted August 23, 2010 It sounds like there is something wrong with your sister. Unfortunately it could be anything really. If you guys could afford I'd maybe look into getting her therapy but if that won't work, then maybe just try interacting with her as little as possible. Don't have conversations with her, if she asks a question keep your replies as short and polite as possible. Don't engage her. Try to spend as much time as possible away from her. She's not worth the anger. Link to post Share on other sites
rockmartinn24 Posted August 26, 2010 Share Posted August 26, 2010 It is a teen age problem. Girls always become a angry in their teen age. But if your sister continuously behave like this than it is not good for your family. You can just tell your sister it is a bad habit. respect parents and love everyone. Link to post Share on other sites
Dooda Posted August 26, 2010 Share Posted August 26, 2010 (edited) My sister is 21 and I'm 26. we got along well when we were younger but when she turned 16 she started become really hostile towards everyone in my family, not just me. Everyone chalked it up to her being a teenager. Cue to 5 years later and it's only getting worse. She gets offended really easily and loves to leave the room dramatically. She'll talk back to my parents but is way worse to me. I've never heard her apologize. Ever. I've never heard her admit she was wrong. I can't start a conversation with her without her becoming angry within 20 minutes. She is so insensitive and I wonder if there is something wrong with her. Just today she came into my living room. We had just dicussed yesterday how she thought I was so selfish because I was going to move out again (long story) and I said well at least you have the living room to yourself to which she angrily replied that she never spent time there. So today I jokingly said "I thought you never spent time here!" To that she BLEW up again and snapped at me. The point is, its getting increasingly harder for me to say anything to her. What do I do? I lost my temper today (I usually try to keep my cool) but I can't take it anymore and I screamed at her. She just said coldly "you are so dumb." What is wrong with her? Is it me? It can't be... She does this to everyone. She also fights with her boyfriend all the time. I can honestly say they argue everyday. Maybe you guys have been rough on her, and she has this chip on her shoulder where she's angry at you all the time. You say she gets annoyed with you, yet you keep teasing her like it's nothing. Maybe she doesn't like it... Just leave her alone and give her her space. By "everyone", do you mean the family? How does she get along with friends other than her boyfriend? Her all of a sudden turning "hostile" at 16 doesn't happen out of the blue, it has to have happened out of feelings of inner inadequacy. She is missing something, maybe from you, maybe from someone else, maybe your family. You shouldn't be so quick to blame your sister. Do you ever lose control and scream at her and swear at her whenever you can't "take it anymore"? Did you used to do this in the past when she wasn't so 'hostile'? Ask yourself these questions. How did her parents treat her? You seem to think that she owes something to you, when she doesn't. Have you ever admitted you're wrong, without asking for an apology in return, saying "But,...." I say this because I had a brother who was a 'good' brother, but never looked at his behavior as wrong in any way. He always questioned me. Until the age of 17, I was a good 'little brother', and then they sent me off to military school and I turned into the 'bad brother'. I was angry and bitter, but I realize that it was because I was treated bad. My parents and brother would do atrocious things, and I never even saw it as abusive before. I thought it was 'normal'. So, maybe what you think of as the 'normal' way of dealing with her, isn't so normal, and that you have to take the time to think about how you are treating her. If you are constantly treating her like a child, and pestering her and being pressuring all the time, this really won't help. Give her her space, and she'll grow up. Is it me? It can't be... This tells me that you're not really questioning yourself, you're just giving yourself the pretense to make yourself think that you're questioning yourself. Edited August 26, 2010 by Dooda Link to post Share on other sites
Dooda Posted August 26, 2010 Share Posted August 26, 2010 Reading your post again, it seems to me like you're in total denial, and you'd rather pin all your problems on her rather than make a sincere effort to fix the relationship. When have you ever approached her, and asked, "What is bothering you?" Once again, turning hostile all of a sudden at the age of 16 doesn't happen out of the blue. There's a good reason for it, and it's often because kids feel they are lacking something... Pinning her against your family really isn't going to help things, and it sounds like you're really isolating her, rather than trying to help her. Once again, take the time to question, rather than to blame. Link to post Share on other sites
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