Oh dear...is this the rebound?!

[Agh!]

Hello,

 

First, I'd like to thank everyone for their advice on my recent break-up with my first love. I'm working through my feelings--and she's working through hers. She's not sure she made the right choice, I'm not sure I made the right choice, but regardless, here we are. Not much else to do but move on. If we want to be friends--or whatever the hell else this would be--I know that healing must occur.

 

I've finally been able to put all of those horrible feelings to the side, focus on my work, my workout, and all that rot. I am constantly busy, barely ever at home, and doing new and "slightly wild" things. (i.e. new tatoo, new look, new clothes, etc.)

 

Now, these aren't bad things at all--things I've always wanted to do anyway. In fact, after the break-up (and after a "drunken ex-boyfriend crying on the phonecall" that I made to her), I all-of-the-sudden felt...I don't know...different. Like I realised that for so long, I was deferring my youth for whatever reason.

 

I feel I've deferred some of my "wilder times" because that's not what I was "supposed" to do. Last Friday, I asked myself, "Why?" (e.g., tatoo). I don't think that this is a "mid-life" crisis, more, I think it's a mid-youth realisation. I'm 25. I'm still young. I can still "get away" with being a little bit wild for a bit. And I'm starting to really think that. In fact, I'm starting to know that.

 

So here is my dilemna. I don't want the rebound. I *really really really* don't want to rebound into a doomed relationship. In fact, after all of this, I don't think that I can handle another relationship *anytime* soon (years...I need to work these feelings out before I invite another woman into my most intimate life). But...and this is going to sound scummy...I feel so utterly horny. It's like this strange hunger that says "You've put this off, and now it's time to play." I can control my hormones, that's not my concern...but I'm starting to think that "well, yeah, they may be right."

 

I don't want to hurt anyone--her, me, others, etc. But now, I'm starting to wonder if I need to "let my hair down" (if I didn't shave my head). I don't want to be a bad guy...but I want to be a "single guy" for a while...a long while, actually. But I do want to play around a little bit...with women who also wish to play around. (and...i know i know i know, it isn't right, but part of me *really* wants her.)

 

But I love her? Ack. You see where I'm coming from? It's too odd.

 

I don't know if anyone has an answer for this...other than negative ones...but this is a strange feeling that has washed over me...and as always, I need to scream my most intimate thoughts out into the Internet... Yikes a roonie.

 

So here I am...hurt, now hornier than ever.

 

help.

 

Ack!

[billy the kid]

hit the red light district... a little cash a few condoms, and you'll have a blast

Hello, First, I'd like to thank everyone for their advice on my recent break-up with my first love. I'm working through my feelings--and she's working through hers. She's not sure she made the right choice, I'm not sure I made the right choice, but regardless, here we are. Not much else to do but move on. If we want to be friends--or whatever the hell else this would be--I know that healing must occur. I've finally been able to put all of those horrible feelings to the side, focus on my work, my workout, and all that rot. I am constantly busy, barely ever at home, and doing new and "slightly wild" things. (i.e. new tatoo, new look, new clothes, etc.) Now, these aren't bad things at all--things I've always wanted to do anyway. In fact, after the break-up (and after a "drunken ex-boyfriend crying on the phonecall" that I made to her), I all-of-the-sudden felt...I don't know...different. Like I realised that for so long, I was deferring my youth for whatever reason. I feel I've deferred some of my "wilder times" because that's not what I was "supposed" to do. Last Friday, I asked myself, "Why?" (e.g., tatoo). I don't think that this is a "mid-life" crisis, more, I think it's a mid-youth realisation. I'm 25. I'm still young. I can still "get away" with being a little bit wild for a bit. And I'm starting to really think that. In fact, I'm starting to know that. So here is my dilemna. I don't want the rebound. I *really really really* don't want to rebound into a doomed relationship. In fact, after all of this, I don't think that I can handle another relationship *anytime* soon (years...I need to work these feelings out before I invite another woman into my most intimate life). But...and this is going to sound scummy...I feel so utterly horny. It's like this strange hunger that says "You've put this off, and now it's time to play." I can control my hormones, that's not my concern...but I'm starting to think that "well, yeah, they may be right." I don't want to hurt anyone--her, me, others, etc. But now, I'm starting to wonder if I need to "let my hair down" (if I didn't shave my head). I don't want to be a bad guy...but I want to be a "single guy" for a while...a long while, actually. But I do want to play around a little bit...with women who also wish to play around. (and...i know i know i know, it isn't right, but part of me *really* wants her.) But I love her? Ack. You see where I'm coming from? It's too odd. I don't know if anyone has an answer for this...other than negative ones...but this is a strange feeling that has washed over me...and as always, I need to scream my most intimate thoughts out into the Internet... Yikes a roonie. So here I am...hurt, now hornier than ever.

 

help. Ack!

[Elmer]

Howdy Ach!

 

I can't really offer you advice, seeing as I'm about two weeks and a great deal of distress behind your situation. But the situations are similar, and I feel even now like I owe myself uncomplicated time with some uncomplicated women.

 

All the advice I've got from (particularly male) friends is to do it, be the ladies man for a while. A bonus, apparently, is that your ex will probably be jealous in some way as well.

 

Good luck from someone who will soon understand.