Thorgs Posted July 24, 2010 Share Posted July 24, 2010 of course it wont happen again. i cant even get a hardon anymore, not that i have any thoughts of sex. i dont even know how i can have sex with her if she ever forgives me. i ruined so much. the unhappy ending of a real life fairy tale. foreplay works wonders my friend. Link to post Share on other sites
Author SammySunh Posted July 24, 2010 Author Share Posted July 24, 2010 whether it is or isn't, there are professionals out there to help you. you need to buy yourself an exercise bike or treadmill to work off this energy...although, i know you're flipping out right now. i was at this point about 3 weeks ago, losing the only person in my life. just don't become suicidal how i was. show your wife that you're strong and confident and want to fix what was done. thanks, im not suicidal. i have a gym membership and work out 4 times a week along with weekly marital arts classes. i still havent eaten. why do i even say this, such a drama queen. food is steps away. am i sick in the head? is this what mental illness is like or am i just looking for a crutch to justify the stupidist thing i have ever done. Link to post Share on other sites
BellaBellaBella Posted July 24, 2010 Share Posted July 24, 2010 Sammy, Slapping the crud out of you again. No your not on suicide watch. We are concerned and trying to support you. First place I would be stunned if you could get a rise right now, with the mental torture, shame and fear of std's. Second I don't think you can get herpes unless the girl had an active outbreak at the moment. A friend's BF gave it to her and she has lived with it for years. She was told by her doctor can't pass it unless an active outbreak. Did you do anything to her orally???? Link to post Share on other sites
Author SammySunh Posted July 24, 2010 Author Share Posted July 24, 2010 foreplay works wonders my friend. brother, my wife isnt going to let me anywhere near her body. its not even on my mind. my libido is gone and i dont even care about that really. and if i do have herpes, then what? Link to post Share on other sites
Thorgs Posted July 24, 2010 Share Posted July 24, 2010 I just meant that she will want to see a confident man trying to fix this, not a pathetic excuse for a man. What's done is done...there's only one direction to go from here and that direction is forward. Instead of dwelling on what's done, start planning out how you're going to improve yourself and make amends with that girl you met 20 years ago. Link to post Share on other sites
BellaBellaBella Posted July 24, 2010 Share Posted July 24, 2010 Step away from the computer for 30 seconds and get a yogurt or something easy on the stomach. I know you don't feel like eating, however you have a duty to for your wive and kids. Link to post Share on other sites
Author SammySunh Posted July 24, 2010 Author Share Posted July 24, 2010 Sammy, Slapping the crud out of you again. No your not on suicide watch. We are concerned and trying to support you. First place I would be stunned if you could get a rise right now, with the mental torture, shame and fear of std's. Second I don't think you can get herpes unless the girl had an active outbreak at the moment. A friend's BF gave it to her and she has lived with it for years. She was told by her doctor can't pass it unless an active outbreak. Did you do anything to her orally???? no ... ugh, how can a guy know she is gross, not want to touch her but still let her use her disgusting mouth on me. i touched her with my hands and she used her mouth. i dont want to go into any more details as my wife may very read this thread and i dont want to cause her any more pain. Link to post Share on other sites
Thorgs Posted July 24, 2010 Share Posted July 24, 2010 brother, my wife isnt going to let me anywhere near her body. its not even on my mind. my libido is gone and i dont even care about that really. and if i do have herpes, then what? I was referring to before when you couldn't pop a chubby. As for now, it's understandable because you are ashamed. Link to post Share on other sites
Corporate Posted July 24, 2010 Share Posted July 24, 2010 of course it wont happen again. i cant even get a hardon anymore, not that i have any thoughts of sex. What kind of sex did you have with this woman? Did you go down on her? Did you have anal sex without protection? (One of the easiest way to spread HIV). What about her possibly getting pregnant? Does she know anything about you and go after you? Link to post Share on other sites
Author SammySunh Posted July 24, 2010 Author Share Posted July 24, 2010 I just meant that she will want to see a confident man trying to fix this, not a pathetic excuse for a man. What's done is done...there's only one direction to go from here and that direction is forward. Instead of dwelling on what's done, start planning out how you're going to improve yourself and make amends with that girl you met 20 years ago. i agree ... i am doing that, but i guess this is just me venting. i have always avoided saying "whats done is done"... i think thats a crutch to diminish the pain caused by telling someone to basically get over it. Link to post Share on other sites
Thorgs Posted July 24, 2010 Share Posted July 24, 2010 What kind of sex did you have with this woman? Did you go down on her? Did you have anal sex without protection? (One of the easiest way to spread HIV). What about her possibly getting pregnant? Does she know anything about you and go after you? He's snipped, she gave him oral and I guess he fingered her. That's it. Link to post Share on other sites
Corporate Posted July 24, 2010 Share Posted July 24, 2010 Did you kiss her at all on the lips/mouth? Link to post Share on other sites
Author SammySunh Posted July 24, 2010 Author Share Posted July 24, 2010 What kind of sex did you have with this woman? Did you go down on her? Did you have anal sex without protection? (One of the easiest way to spread HIV). What about her possibly getting pregnant? Does she know anything about you and go after you? i have already answered that, i know its a long thread but i dont want to answer it again. not trying to be rude, i know you are just asking and i know i could have typed your answer instead of this, but i dont want to type it out again. back on page 1, someone said dont feed the troll. i wish i was a troll, i really do. Link to post Share on other sites
Thorgs Posted July 24, 2010 Share Posted July 24, 2010 i agree ... i am doing that, but i guess this is just me venting. i have always avoided saying "whats done is done"... i think thats a crutch to diminish the pain caused by telling someone to basically get over it. Not to get over it. But to accept it happened and to now take the appropriate actions to make amends. I'm not diminishing the fact as to what happened by any means. Link to post Share on other sites
BellaBellaBella Posted July 24, 2010 Share Posted July 24, 2010 According to my studies of late most betrayed spouses want details. She may feel some relief it didn't go any further. Did you read the link I sent on std's and BJ's. Link to post Share on other sites
Corporate Posted July 24, 2010 Share Posted July 24, 2010 Well, you should wash your finger(s). And, you shouldn't let your finger or your lips go anywhere near your wife or kids for a while. Link to post Share on other sites
Author SammySunh Posted July 24, 2010 Author Share Posted July 24, 2010 According to my studies of late most betrayed spouses want details. She may feel some relief it didn't go any further. Did you read the link I sent on std's and BJ's. thanks i did ... i also followed some links. it didnt tell me anything i didnt already know though. Link to post Share on other sites
Author SammySunh Posted July 24, 2010 Author Share Posted July 24, 2010 Well, you should wash your finger(s). And, you shouldn't let your finger or your lips go anywhere near your wife or kids for a while. that scares me. im going to throw up. Link to post Share on other sites
Enchanted Girl Posted July 24, 2010 Share Posted July 24, 2010 Not to get over it. But to accept it happened and to now take the appropriate actions to make amends. I'm not diminishing the fact as to what happened by any means. Yea, you can't change the past, but you can't live in it either. You have to move on and use your past mistakes to make you a better person in the future. Link to post Share on other sites
BellaBellaBella Posted July 24, 2010 Share Posted July 24, 2010 Sammy any cuts on the fingers involved. Let's stop and keep it simple. It has to break a mucous barrier or an open sore or cut. Call the er and ask the nurse on call about the finger thing and touching people. Or ask in the morning at std appointment. Let's not get in an uproar over non confirmed info Link to post Share on other sites
Author SammySunh Posted July 24, 2010 Author Share Posted July 24, 2010 maybe i should buy a plane ticket and go to her and tell her. let her use the ticket to come home and i will carry the burden of driving the 12 hours through the mountains to get the car home. it will give her a 2 days head start on figuring out how she needs to deal with this. Link to post Share on other sites
Author SammySunh Posted July 24, 2010 Author Share Posted July 24, 2010 Sammy any cuts on the fingers involved. Let's stop and keep it simple. It has to break a mucous barrier or an open sore or cut. Call the er and ask the nurse on call about the finger thing and touching people. Or ask in the morning at std appointment. Let's not get in an uproar over non confirmed info just hang nails. i dont think any are bare though. i know i will ask at the clinic tomorrow, i could call our 24 hours health line, but it wont do anything until i get a test. until then, why should i be spared the pain tonight? i brought this on, a night of torment is nothing compared to what i did to my family. Link to post Share on other sites
Thorgs Posted July 24, 2010 Share Posted July 24, 2010 I'm not sure what time it is, but sleeping might be good for you. Or go watch a movie until you fall asleep. You've gotten everything possible out of your system and now you are just revisiting it. Then tomorrow you can wake up energized and ready to tackle the first steps of your path of making things right. Link to post Share on other sites
BellaBellaBella Posted July 24, 2010 Share Posted July 24, 2010 Do you have any family you could call to be with you? Do you need to go to ER tonight to get sedation? Link to post Share on other sites
Author SammySunh Posted July 24, 2010 Author Share Posted July 24, 2010 you are right THorgs ... i am rehashing, thanks for your patience on a friday night. Link to post Share on other sites
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