Co-worker that whines and whines and whines and whines........

[carla]

I work with a girl that is a chronic winer. It is pathetic. She is a chronic hypocondriac. If she's not complaining about some pain, "It feels like someone kicked me in the stomach." "I feel feel like I have to Puke." (I'm really starting to hate the word PUKE) "I'm so far in debt I can't pay my bills, I have the collection agencies after me." "I'm so fat." Here's a girl that is 25 and has had more medical problems then your average 90 yr old. She's a little over weight, always has stomach aches and has tons of bills. But she continues to stuff her face with food mostly take out and is always spending money. The day after she was wining about her bills, she was braggin that her and the bf were going to order pizza, have some wine and beer and watch a movie. (expenses about $50) She is extremely bossy, when she is in charge of the shift she carries on like she owns the place. I've even mentioned that she was a Bitch to the new people, she was proud of that and said that then they will listen to her. When her bf comes in to see her sometimes she bites hims head off and starts ranting and ravingto him in front of everyone. He doesn't say a word. It really looks funny b/c he's twice the size of her. It's so bad that customers quitely comment to me about it. To top it off she's tring to get pregnant. Everyone at work knows what she it like but doesn't say anything. I've tried different things, like when she complains about a headache I tell her that somewhere someone has a brain tumor. and the same with other illnesses that she may have over the course of the day. I now act as though I didn't even hear what she said and change the subject. It still doesn't work. On occasion when I've made the mistake of saying I have a head ache well that begins the story of her contiuous suffering of migrains. When it comes to the bills I've told her stop spending. I've commented about her going out to eat ALL the time instead of buying groceries and eating at home. She admitts that she spends alot but she doesn't want to even help herself. In the last year she has lived in 3 apartments each one being more expensive then the 1 before and each time carring bills over from the apartment before. I sick of the constant wining. I've mentioned it to the boss and he won't say anything to her. I now just ignore her and she still goes on. When ignore me I know they don't care so I stop talking. This theory doesn't click with her. Any suggestions. Thanks foe letting me vent.

[quankanne]

urgh ... that's an annoying situation to have to put with. you have some options, though. Cut her off at the knees by disinterestedly telling her "that's nice" and change the subject. Or you could be Miss Wide-Eyed Wonder and ask in a gushing but concerned voice, "really? your headache hasn't gone away yet? have you thought about going in for a scan to see if you've had a tumor up there -- people can die when they let that stuff go undetected!" Or, there's always sarcasm: "I'm surprised your head hasn't fallen off/exploded/etc. with all the headaches you've had. Now about that report we're supposed to be working on …"

 

My favorite is, "All right already!" and "That's not the question I asked you, why are you ignoring what I said" (a real hit with certain family members, lol)

 

once she gets that you're not an interested party to her constant complaining/whining, she'll probably leave you alone because those kinds of people need an audience.

[carla]

LOL That's funny. One of the jokes when I get home from work and my bf asks how my day went " -------- Fallopian tubes fell out and she tripped over them and stubed her toe, boy she was in pain." or my bf will ask "Did (and the same statement.)" Another annoying thing that she does all of the time is when she does stub her toe or bangs her elbow or something that everyone does on a daily basis but does think anything about it she will yell out "OU OU OU OU OU OU" loud enough so everyone in the building will hear her. Thanks for the advise. I don't think that I could say those things with a straight face.

[Arabess]

I work with men......and let me tell you....I don't think ANYONE moans, bitches and complains more than sailors or contractors! HAHA!

 

I think some people just get into the habit of it and don't realize it's ALL they talk about. I doubt it would do any good to bring it to their attention.

 

Too bad you can't tell her to 'share with someone who gives a $hit!'. LOL!

[Bluejean]

People who whine often times are not aware that they whine and may even be depressed. Instead of criticizing her, have you thought of offering her some help and honestly telling her that she whines and complains too much??

[carla]

I don't think that she is depressed. From what I hear her mother is the same way. She often complains that she is sick of listening to her sister whine and complain about every little aliment. I honestly think it is a family taught thing. I've also been told that her aunt which is her mothers' sister is the same way.

[flannelpajamas]

I used to be the whiny one when I waited tables in college. Once I was working a shift with someone and we were discussing another co-worker named Valerie. The person I was working with said something like "Oh yeah, Valerie is a real trouper. You never hear that girl complain." It kind of woke me up to the fact that I complained a lot at work, but it didn't change anything around me. I realized work was tough on all of us and that I could be someone positive like Valerie. Who knows, maybe one day this woman will wake up too from some random comment or good role model.

[befuddled11]

next time she's bellyaching, ask her:

 

"do you want some cheese?"

 

She'll likely look at you all stunned and say, "cheese?"

 

Then say, "Yeah, do you want some cheese with your whine"..then smirk and walk away from her.

[carla]

I've tryed that line she just smirks and gives a sarcastic chuckle and walks away to come back a few minutes later to start that whining all over again. Oh any by the way the latest up date is that the chroncic hypochondriac whiner is pregnant. God help me.

[purpleknif67]

I work with someone like that--yeah, I thought women mostly whined, but I have to agree with Arabess--men do a lot of it too--besides sailors and contractors I will have to add in policemen(my coworker's full time job). I really agree with BlueJean--I think a lot of constant complainers are depressed. Even though she may act bossy and give off a super confident air, she may still be carrying around a lot of insecure baggage.

[AnnikaKarina]

Just look her point-blank in the eyes and say,"You've mistaken me for someone who cares!!!!"

[magda]

Do we work together? Gawd, I can so relate. Mine pretends to be a cripple until someone says there's cake in the lunchroom. The woman forgets her cane and practically runs. For being broke she shows up with new gadgets all the time, too. Between feeding her fat face with burger king, her laptops, pdas and cocktail of barbituates, it's no wonder she's got issues to complain about. She really gets off on people pitying her so I ignore the fat bitch completely. I know plenty of people that live their lives in pain but are able to shut the f*ck up about it. Just makes things worse on herself - but she clearly prefers things that way. She's convinced hers is a life of suffering and so suffer she shall. (And everyone forced to listen to her nutcase rambling. And me because I do the work it takes too long to explain to her.. or what she left behind because of another of her "doctor appts"... another benefit she enjoys is not having to work.)

 

I actually suspect she's insane. Either that or it's extremely rapid cycles of bi-polar. Or the drugs. She literally walks into walls. One second she's high as hell and the next her eyes are rolling back of her head. I'm sure they only keep her around because of her pity=me routine.