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We fell in love one month after they broke up; how do I tell him?


cappie

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Hiya,

 

I'm currently in love with a very special girl, however.. she split up with a good friend of mine 1 month ago..

 

I don't want him to think that she cheated on him while they still had 'something', because thats not true... (please note that I've known her for about 8 months now, and they had something for 2.5 years, but the last 6 months were pretty bad for them.. they even broke up in september last year, but got back together in october, because she felt guilty). She broke up with him on january 11th.. and a week or two after that I realized that I felt more for her than I did before.. mostly because I had this loyalty towards that friend of mine which was 'in the way' between me and her. She saw me as a friend from somewhere in late november, but since they broke up, we had a sort of relaxed 'everything is possible.. we'll just wait and see what happens'-attitude towards eachother.

 

Soon we discovered that we felt stronger and stronger for eachother.. even asking ourself the questions: (her) "Am I not replacing my boyfriend for him?" and (me) "Isn't this feeling something I've missed for a long time?.. am I just filling in a gap as well?". We both agreed that this wasn't the case, and that what we felt for eachother was true.. and thats where we are now.. slowly getting used to eachother, getting to know eachother better... She's the first girl that I've had feelings of true love for, not the childish 'in-love' kinda love I had for other girls in the past... (I guess the three years of one-night stands and philosophy learned me one of the most valuable lessons about what real love is, and what isn't real love)

 

I already lied to him when he asked me where I was on a saturday in january, but I feel very bad about it, and I don't want to lie about my feelings for her, not even to him.. I'm going to tell him how I feel about her next friday, february 13th (oops)...

 

Do any of you have any tips on how to bring him this news? this situation is kinda new for me.. any wise advice is much appreciated!

 

thanks in advance

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If he's a good friend....just sit him down and be honest. The longer you wait....the longer it WILL look as though you had something to hide.

 

It's tough when these things happen and he may be upset with you for awhile. If he IS a good friend though....he'll get over it and probably move on with his life without hard feelings.

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Originally posted by Arabess

If he's a good friend....just sit him down and be honest. The longer you wait....the longer it WILL look as though you had something to hide.

 

It's tough when these things happen and he may be upset with you for awhile. If he IS a good friend though....he'll get over it and probably move on with his life without hard feelings.

 

I told him tonight.. he responded calmly, but I sensed a very deep anger.. he did, however, respect the fact that I was honest with him... that still doesn't make me feel any better though, but at least he knows about it, and the lie has died... hopefully we can be friends someday again..

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