bonpaw2008 Posted August 4, 2010 Share Posted August 4, 2010 (edited) "power" and "love" the only two words in the dictionary that can make or destroy a person or a nation for that matter.... PAW - on a serious note **** it, there is only one way left for me to go, if this break were to kill me then it would have and since it hasn't the only say left for me is to become stronger... Yes I still love her (as I keep on rambling repeatedly) but she left me, and there is nothing else left for ms to do but move on... Totally agree, there is so much more to life than this misery dealt to us by people that supposedly loved us...we have the power to get out of this mess, we have the power to feel better, we are in control, we have the power to say **** you to the people that no longer want us, and never really deserved us (I know I keep saying the same thing but it makes me believe it the more I say it ) Edited August 4, 2010 by bonpaw2008 Link to post Share on other sites
HighPlainsDrifter Posted August 4, 2010 Share Posted August 4, 2010 HPD - oh but it DID get to me, it still ****ing gets to me that I let someone have so much ****ing power over me, it ****ing gets to me that I was ****ing stupid enough to give another person so much ****ing power to destroy me with 3 words - "I love you"... I will move forward from this, yes I still love her, more with each moment that passes, but she LEFT me, so why should I beat myself up??? It's her loss... **** it, I am and I will climb out of this abysmal Pitt of despair and I will become stronger , and I will live my life, because its mine to live... **** 'em, she didn't kill me, so I can only become stronger ..... $hit dude... I'm right with you.. And I'm STILL getting that message, although not those very f*ckin words in those sappy emails she send me. It seriously has messed me up! SMK, I don't know if I'm going to be able to avoid the card shop tonight. Nothing sappy, but just maybe apologizing for pressuring her to meet me last week of something. I know it's a bad idea. I gotta talk myself out of it. I just know I was THIS close last week and I'm tied up in knots about it! I know I got to shake this off too. Day 7 has been complete hell. My head and my heart are at war right now. I need to take your manta. I'm dyin over here!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author smk Posted August 4, 2010 Author Share Posted August 4, 2010 PAW - so long as we keep repeating if to ourselves sooner or later it will happen... **** 'em... The left, not us (HPD this goes for you too) - seriously what's the ****ing worst that could happen, we have already been there, and we can't get any worse... Seriously **** 'em that's my mantra, I still love K but she chose to leave, so there ain't nothing else I can do... Link to post Share on other sites
GrayClouds Posted August 4, 2010 Share Posted August 4, 2010 PAW - so long as we keep repeating if to ourselves sooner or later it will happen... **** 'em... The left, not us (HPD this goes for you too) - seriously what's the ****ing worst that could happen, we have already been there, and we can't get any worse... Seriously **** 'em that's my mantra, I still love K but she chose to leave, so there ain't nothing else I can do... Too negative, too focus on them, keep it positive and about you. Link to post Share on other sites
HighPlainsDrifter Posted August 4, 2010 Share Posted August 4, 2010 PAW - so long as we keep repeating if to ourselves sooner or later it will happen... **** 'em... The left, not us (HPD this goes for you too) - seriously what's the ****ing worst that could happen, we have already been there, and we can't get any worse... Seriously **** 'em that's my mantra, I still love K but she chose to leave, so there ain't nothing else I can do... I know man, I know... Just feels so wrong to quit, even if I guess they have quit you. It's this whole no closure BS that has totally messed me. I haven't done anything in 7 days and it's eating at me. I can't say f**k em to someone I still love. You're right about one thing... It would be tough to get any worse right now... Link to post Share on other sites
Author smk Posted August 5, 2010 Author Share Posted August 5, 2010 Well reading through what I wrote last night, I guess the contact from her kinda affected me more than I thought, hence all the negativity... HPD - I can't do that either but hey I can't do much else right now and focus on myself and learning the lessons that can be had from the tragedy of the situation... I always look for the best in any situation and try to be positive of the outcome no matter how negative the situation so I am just going to keep on working on that, keep on working and focussing on how I can be a better, stronger person from this. I am going to face every feeling, every emotion and let it take it's course, and just live my life... Link to post Share on other sites
skydiveaddict Posted August 5, 2010 Share Posted August 5, 2010 I am going to face every feeling, every emotion and let it take it's course, and just live my life... That's all any of us can do. You're on the right track Link to post Share on other sites
Author smk Posted August 5, 2010 Author Share Posted August 5, 2010 That's all any of us can do. You're on the right track I figured the more I try to fight them, the more they will end up consuming me - it is however a lot easier said than done - but the highway out of hell is one bumby ride, so ladies and gentlemen be prepared for some turbulence.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author smk Posted August 5, 2010 Author Share Posted August 5, 2010 So i just received a text from the ex - she would like to meet up for a coffee to give me my mail.... hmmm - i recall someone saying this would happen... Link to post Share on other sites
cookie2 Posted August 5, 2010 Share Posted August 5, 2010 Do you know what the mail is? Is it something you actually need, or just junk?? If important things are still going to her address then have your mail redirected. http://www.royalmail.com/portal/rm/product1?catId=400040&mediaId=600008 That will prevent the situation happening again. Link to post Share on other sites
Treasa Posted August 5, 2010 Share Posted August 5, 2010 You already know the answer to this. DON'T DO IT. It will only make you feel worse. Tell her via text to just mail it, COD or postage due, and you'll pay for the postage. Keep the response as brief as possible. And by the way, have you considered taking up martial arts? Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted August 5, 2010 Share Posted August 5, 2010 Do you also recall anyone saying "ask her to either leave it with a mutual friend, or to drop it off where you work, or to forward it by mail"....? If you don't, I'm saying it now. If we get post for the previous tenant here, I simply write their new address on the envelope, and put it in the mailbox with the additional legend: "Recipient no longer at this address. Please forward to - *new address*." I also made it a proviso to only do it for the first three months. After that, all mail would be disposed of. This gave the old tenant ample time to contact all companies still writing to him, at this address, to advise them of the change in his circumstances. I suggest you do the same (ask her to forward it to you in that way) then make sure no more of your mail is delivered there, if you haven't already done so. Link to post Share on other sites
Author smk Posted August 5, 2010 Author Share Posted August 5, 2010 @ Cookie - yeah its actually a credit card statement and I even know which one - cos I changed my address with the last and when I phoned them up this morning to confirm which month it was they told me it was for june and was posted out early july... I know royal mail mess up but wow 4 weeks late... Link to post Share on other sites
cookie2 Posted August 5, 2010 Share Posted August 5, 2010 Doh - can't you access it online? If you absolutely need the paper one then do as TM says, get her to put your new address and "Recipient no longer at this address, please forward". I've done that when I moved house, and the new people at my old address did it for me - so I know it works, and doesn't cost her anything Link to post Share on other sites
bonpaw2008 Posted August 5, 2010 Share Posted August 5, 2010 So i just received a text from the ex - she would like to meet up for a coffee to give me my mail.... hmmm - i recall someone saying this would happen... Just like you said with your "what are they really saying" she saw you, didn't get the begging, pining response that she was looking for, and she is trying again. Be strong, you know that this is a bad situation, you don't want to get back in with her and the same thing happen. She works for you, that can't be good for anyone....because this will happen again.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author smk Posted August 5, 2010 Author Share Posted August 5, 2010 Just like you said with your "what are they really saying" she saw you, didn't get the begging, pining response that she was looking for, and she is trying again. Be strong, you know that this is a bad situation, you don't want to get back in with her and the same thing happen. She works for you, that can't be good for anyone....because this will happen again.... yeah I know - i guess the events after a break up are predictable - everything being said here on LS seems to be happening - wow.... about the work thing - we are contemplating giving her a shareholding in the business... @cookie - yeah i can view them online - and have asked for them to be posted. @ Treasa & TM - i am going to stick it out with NC - asked for them to be posted to me and to leave it at that.... its just so weird though.... hehehehe Link to post Share on other sites
bonpaw2008 Posted August 5, 2010 Share Posted August 5, 2010 (edited) yeah I know - i guess the events after a break up are predictable - everything being said here on LS seems to be happening - wow.... about the work thing - we are contemplating giving her a shareholding in the business... @cookie - yeah i can view them online - and have asked for them to be posted. @ Treasa & TM - i am going to stick it out with NC - asked for them to be posted to me and to leave it at that.... its just so weird though.... hehehehe Why would you do this??? SORRY TERRIBLY RUDE, I edited to say sorry....and to say that I am very proud of you for staying NC....you don't know her intentions and if she has honorable ones she will have to say them before you put yourself back out there Edited August 5, 2010 by bonpaw2008 Link to post Share on other sites
Chinook Posted August 5, 2010 Share Posted August 5, 2010 smk - no offence man... but are you really that clueless...? Her being on the train platform was no coincidence. She was there because she knew you would be there. That's where this started. This is how it starts with the games and the flip-flopping process. Let me tell you (as I'm sure many others could) what happens next... she's contact you more text/mail/calls. Might even see you on the station again. Might even show up at the office/work etc. The point is, she's in the chase position now. She's trying to work out whether she still has you dangling on the end of her string. So far... yes she has, you spoke to her on the train station (yea, polite of you, how could you not!) But the mails and texts... really no response at all is required. She knows what to do with your mail. She knows what to do with your belongings. There is no need to contact you. At all. Period. She's trying to contact you because she's trying to work out whether you're still at her beck and call. Are you...? This person LEFT you and caused you pain and devastation. She doesn't deserve your time, thought or effort. Sorry, honourable intentions or not, someone who is capable of hurting you that way and inflicting that amount of pain on someone they supposedly love... that's a huge problem for any future with them in it. It is in my opinion anyhow. Link to post Share on other sites
Author smk Posted August 5, 2010 Author Share Posted August 5, 2010 smk - no offence man... but are you really that clueless...? Her being on the train platform was no coincidence. She was there because she knew you would be there. That's where this started. This is how it starts with the games and the flip-flopping process. Let me tell you (as I'm sure many others could) what happens next... she's contact you more text/mail/calls. Might even see you on the station again. Might even show up at the office/work etc. The point is, she's in the chase position now. She's trying to work out whether she still has you dangling on the end of her string. So far... yes she has, you spoke to her on the train station (yea, polite of you, how could you not!) But the mails and texts... really no response at all is required. She knows what to do with your mail. She knows what to do with your belongings. There is no need to contact you. At all. Period. She's trying to contact you because she's trying to work out whether you're still at her beck and call. Are you...? This person LEFT you and caused you pain and devastation. She doesn't deserve your time, thought or effort. Sorry, honourable intentions or not, someone who is capable of hurting you that way and inflicting that amount of pain on someone they supposedly love... that's a huge problem for any future with them in it. It is in my opinion anyhow. I know exactly what you mean - and everything that I have read about on other peoples post seems to be happening here. It all seems to be following a set pattern... I will be honest I was intrigued at first and now the more I think about it, things seem to make sense. I did mess up a little by replying but I did keep it short, simple and straight to the point - didn't say anything more than needed. Hell I am still a little intrigued as to why now all of a sudden, I checked with my card company and the statement was posted out at the beginning of July now we are in August - so yes things do seem a little off. I am going to go home, go for my run, and just go on as normal.. and if she really has something important then she knows where I live & work.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author smk Posted August 5, 2010 Author Share Posted August 5, 2010 Why would you do this??? SORRY TERRIBLY RUDE, I edited to say sorry....and to say that I am very proud of you for staying NC....you don't know her intentions and if she has honorable ones she will have to say them before you put yourself back out there I know its silly, but she is actually pretty good at her job and has contributed to a little bit of the growth of the business, hence as a reward - its only a really small percentage... Yeah if she does have something to say then she needs to say it upfront and not play silly buggers... Link to post Share on other sites
calculus one Posted August 9, 2010 Share Posted August 9, 2010 "power" and "love" the only two words in the dictionary that can make or destroy a person or a nation for that matter.... PAW - on a serious note **** it, there is only one way left for me to go, if this break were to kill me then it would have and since it hasn't the only say left for me is to become stronger... Yes I still love her (as I keep on rambling repeatedly) but she left me, and there is nothing else left for ms to do but move on... . ..An old Doors song but havent we all seen/heard before about how men wont even look at or even be polite to their SO but when the SO finally gives up and leaves the guys are stalking them with guns or shooting themselves? If the women return it means two sessions of make up sex and one bunch of flowers and the women are demoted to serfs again.The issue is when they go we grandize them out of all proportion to reality.The illusion vanishes after they return.If it helps at all you are suffering under a delusion.Much fortune to you in future times. Link to post Share on other sites
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