collegemommy Posted August 4, 2010 Share Posted August 4, 2010 Without going into the whole story, here is the short version. My fiance has two kids from a previous relationship. The youngest was 10 months old when I came into the picture (she is 5 now). That's not really the point... The mother of the kids had a boyfriend for the past 5 years. Last summer, the oldest child said this boyfriend molested her. We believe her but we were unable to press charges last summer since we had some crappy detectives and had no idea what to do. Well, the mother never got rid of the boyfriend although she claimed she had. She was bringing her kids around him and leaving them alone with him. A couple of weeks ago, we were informed that the boyfriend had now touched the youngest. After several days of not being able to see their mother, the youngest claimed she was just lying and asked if she could see her mom, now. So my fiance and I decided that we had to let the kids see the mother or else they would not talk with detectives (their mother convinced them that we would not let her ever see them again if we found out about the boyfriend being around). For one night, we let the girls go over. My fiance demanded that the boyfriend not be there and if he was, he was seeking legal action to prevent the kids from seeing her. Well, we were shocked that she had the nerve to bring this guy around that very night. Anyway, that's the background... My fiance went in to court today (this idiot who molested his kids has filed for 3rd party visitation, stupid we know). He ran into the case worker who is investigating this and she recommended that he file an emergency ex parte petition. I have no idea what that does, how it works, or anything else. Anyone have experience with this?? Link to post Share on other sites
GorillaTheater Posted August 4, 2010 Share Posted August 4, 2010 I don't have family law experience, but essentially what we're talking about is a TRO: something that the judge signs without hearing arguments from the other side (the "ex parte" part) that takes effect immediately (the "emergency" part) pending a full hearing on the merits within a short period of time, maybe a couple of weeks. In this case, it would be a judicial order barring this guy from being in the vicinity of the kids. Get a lawyer. Link to post Share on other sites
Jilly Bean Posted August 4, 2010 Share Posted August 4, 2010 What a horrible story! I'm glad to hear you and your fiance are fighting for the kids, however. Is there any way you and he can keep the kids and allow the Mom visitation until this is resolved? At least this way, the kids can see their Mom, and not have to be around the molester. Link to post Share on other sites
Author collegemommy Posted August 4, 2010 Author Share Posted August 4, 2010 I guess I should explain... We have primary residency of the kids. My fiance and the mother have joint legal custody. The kids have been living with us for the past couple of years (mom was evicted, kicked out of her mother's home, and now lives with a friend...she has not had her kids for 3 years). She does have a court order to see the kids every other weekend. That is the visitation we are currently fighting. I told the mother that she was more than welcome to come to our home to visit the girls...she says we are treating her like a convict and refuses supervised visitation. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted August 4, 2010 Share Posted August 4, 2010 I agree with GT; you need competent legal counsel. Melt a credit card if you have to. I would personally move for an emergency order to suspend the mother's visitation *or* to order it to be supervised until a proper investigation can be conducted. Another scenario would be to refuse visitation access at her location, causing her to have to take you to court to redress your violation of the custody/visitation order. This would be the 'easier to ask forgiveness than permission' plan. If your case were in order, the judge could receive compelling evidence that you moved in the best interests of the children and time was of the essence. A competent lawyer can flesh out all kinds of scenarios, risks and benefits, so you can make an informed decision. Good luck Link to post Share on other sites
Author collegemommy Posted August 4, 2010 Author Share Posted August 4, 2010 I agree with GT; you need competent legal counsel. Melt a credit card if you have to. I would personally move for an emergency order to suspend the mother's visitation *or* to order it to be supervised until a proper investigation can be conducted. Another scenario would be to refuse visitation access at her location, causing her to have to take you to court to redress your violation of the custody/visitation order. This would be the 'easier to ask forgiveness than permission' plan. If your case were in order, the judge could receive compelling evidence that you moved in the best interests of the children and time was of the essence. A competent lawyer can flesh out all kinds of scenarios, risks and benefits, so you can make an informed decision. Good luck Since last week, we have refused visitation at her home. She can either come to our home and see the kids or she just won't visit them until the investigation is complete. We feel that by the time she takes us to court for not allowing access, the investigation will be over. We just can not risk the possiblity of further abuse and since the mother is unable/unwilling to protect her children, this is the only thing we know to do. Don't worry...we will definitely be getting a lawyer! Link to post Share on other sites
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