HopeLove Posted August 5, 2010 Share Posted August 5, 2010 I took courage and deleted him from facebook. I took me all my strengh and after doing it I was devasted. It was like closing the last window I had but I know it was a matter of time. At some point he would deleted me from fb and that would have been even more painful and I imagine that as soon as he'll find out he'll feel relieved. It was incredible hard to do it but I think is another step into moving out. He broke up with a little bit over 3 monthe ago and I've been in absolutely NC for a bit over a month and I tell you, it's still very hard and I'm miss him and think of him every single day and I still wish you he would come back but I know this is not going to happen so I have to do want I can in order to move on. Is the only thing I can or at least try to do. Link to post Share on other sites
Angel1111 Posted August 5, 2010 Share Posted August 5, 2010 I think you did the absolute right thing. Waiting until he did it would just knock you off your feet again. This way, you kept your dignity and that is so under-valued these days. I would've done the same thing. I'm sorry it hurt so much, though. You will get through this. One day at a time. Link to post Share on other sites
bonpaw2008 Posted August 5, 2010 Share Posted August 5, 2010 Congratulations! This is a big step, and a necessary one for you. You need to focus on you, what you are doing, not what he is doing. Good job, stay strong, I know it hurts Link to post Share on other sites
Forget About Her Posted August 5, 2010 Share Posted August 5, 2010 CONGRATULATIONS! I'm at day 5 of no facebook stalking and I feel freaking awesome! It makes things 1 million times easier. I also deleted her sister. I found out a couple nights ago that she is still FB stalking me, because I got a text at 2am about how pissed off she was that I accepted someone as a friend. We were together 5+ years, and she dumped me to 'get her head straight'. Have some self-pride and be strong...MOVE ON! You can be as strong or as weak as you want to be, which one are you going to choose? Link to post Share on other sites
welikeincrowds Posted August 5, 2010 Share Posted August 5, 2010 Great job! I just did this too, and it is surprising (yet at the same time, not surprising) how ****ing hard it is. It is not just a website. You have just made such a powerful move. It requires real balls/ovaries. I'm proud of you! Link to post Share on other sites
Author HopeLove Posted August 5, 2010 Author Share Posted August 5, 2010 I know I've done what I have to do but I'm feeling so terrible I did it. There's no going back and this hurts so much. I struggling not to allow myself to regret what I've done. Oh, I wish this would have been so different. Thank you for the approval of my decission. It helps me thinking I really made the right decision. It's so hard keeping NC. It's been over a month but is not getting any easier. Link to post Share on other sites
bonpaw2008 Posted August 5, 2010 Share Posted August 5, 2010 I know I've done what I have to do but I'm feeling so terrible I did it. There's no going back and this hurts so much. I struggling not to allow myself to regret what I've done. Oh, I wish this would have been so different. Thank you for the approval of my decission. It helps me thinking I really made the right decision. It's so hard keeping NC. It's been over a month but is not getting any easier. NC is for you to get yourself back. Cutting that contact out so you don't have to constantly be bombarded with what he is doing will only help you....xo girl separation is hard, start thinkiing about yourself, you got this!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Angel1111 Posted August 5, 2010 Share Posted August 5, 2010 I know I've done what I have to do but I'm feeling so terrible I did it. There's no going back and this hurts so much. I struggling not to allow myself to regret what I've done. Oh, I wish this would have been so different. Thank you for the approval of my decission. It helps me thinking I really made the right decision. It's so hard keeping NC. It's been over a month but is not getting any easier. Whenever you start to doubt your actions, think about how you'd feel if you had not done this and if one day you found that he deleted you. That would be enough to cure me of regret. Sometimes we have to close doors, even when it's really, really painful. Link to post Share on other sites
Sophia8 Posted August 5, 2010 Share Posted August 5, 2010 I know I've done what I have to do but I'm feeling so terrible I did it. There's no going back and this hurts so much. I struggling not to allow myself to regret what I've done. Oh, I wish this would have been so different. Thank you for the approval of my decission. It helps me thinking I really made the right decision. It's so hard keeping NC. It's been over a month but is not getting any easier. Really well done, what you did took a lot of strength. I know it hurts but you have taken a massive step forward, take some time to be proud of yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
neena62 Posted August 5, 2010 Share Posted August 5, 2010 I joined this forum SPECIFICALLY because I was trying to deal with the Facebook issue. It's incredibly tough. I just deleted the ex a week or two ago and I'll bet he doesn't give a damn - which is so hard. And yet I'm worried about hurting him?...now THAT'S messed up...also worried about seeming very hurt and angry myself. WHICH I AM. So...anyway...I send you all sorts of positive vibes. I know what you're going through right now, and it SUCKS. Link to post Share on other sites
bonpaw2008 Posted August 6, 2010 Share Posted August 6, 2010 I joined this forum SPECIFICALLY because I was trying to deal with the Facebook issue. It's incredibly tough. I just deleted the ex a week or two ago and I'll bet he doesn't give a damn - which is so hard. And yet I'm worried about hurting him?...now THAT'S messed up...also worried about seeming very hurt and angry myself. WHICH I AM. So...anyway...I send you all sorts of positive vibes. I know what you're going through right now, and it SUCKS. It's funny, I deleted him the first day after we broke up, but his friggin profile is wide open so I can see if I wanted to...so I thank this break-up and LS for curing my FB addiction! I haven't been on in over a week, how liberating to get those hours of my day back Link to post Share on other sites
Angel1111 Posted August 6, 2010 Share Posted August 6, 2010 I joined this forum SPECIFICALLY because I was trying to deal with the Facebook issue. It's incredibly tough. I just deleted the ex a week or two ago and I'll bet he doesn't give a damn - which is so hard. And yet I'm worried about hurting him?...now THAT'S messed up...also worried about seeming very hurt and angry myself. WHICH I AM. So...anyway...I send you all sorts of positive vibes. I know what you're going through right now, and it SUCKS. This thing about not wanting to hurt him is something that can be your downfall if you're not careful. I think it's the biggest problem with women when we're in a place where we shouldn't concern ourselves with that. We just don't seem to know how to turn off the niceness. I have a friend who had a friend on facebook and she got mad at my friend because she couldn't make it to her wedding. My friend was going to send her a message on fb and it was then that she realized that this person had de-friended her. So I'm not sure if a person actually knows it right away when you de-friend them unless they try to contact you somehow. I'm not sure but that's what my friend said anyway. In your case and in the case of the OP, it's kind of funny because if these guys decide to remove you or send you a message, they'll realize what happened. Link to post Share on other sites
Meaplus3 Posted August 6, 2010 Share Posted August 6, 2010 Good for you. You took a real big step here towards closure. Keep your chin up. Mea:) Link to post Share on other sites
Thorgs Posted August 6, 2010 Share Posted August 6, 2010 This is what I did...since her daughters are on my friend list but she isn't, I just deleted my FB all together because between them and my family, they were the only ones that talked to me on there. Anyways, it's hard because I checked it all the time, but I feel more free now. Link to post Share on other sites
Author HopeLove Posted August 6, 2010 Author Share Posted August 6, 2010 Neither of us post much in fb so that wasn't the reason. The main reason why I deleted him from fb was because I felt he would have done so eventually and I knew that pain would have been much greater. I knew it would feel pain again so I choose the less painful act. You only notice if someone deleted you from fb if you chech for this specific person or if you realize the number of friends drop and then check who's missing. At some point he'll notice I deleted him. Don't know what will be his though the moment he'll notice it and soon after he'll feel relieve I've done this for him. Not that I should care about what he'll feel... I'll try not to think so much about that. Anyway there's over a month of total NC so there's actually not a big deal we are not "friends" anymore in fb. Our relationship ended 3 months ago anyway and he didn't ask me if I agree with his decision! I need to move on and this is probably one of the steps towards this goal. Link to post Share on other sites
skydiveaddict Posted August 6, 2010 Share Posted August 6, 2010 You did the right thing . You're gonna be ok Link to post Share on other sites
LoveTruthChaos Posted August 6, 2010 Share Posted August 6, 2010 It was like closing the last window I had but I know it was a matter of time. At some point he would deleted me from fb and that would have been even more painful That is exactly why I blocked my ex. We both did the right thing In all honesty, I would have liked to have deleted him a little later, but I couldn't risk him doing it to me first. And he would have, since, only 5 days before I blocked him, he was "in a relationship". He would have been so close to deleting me, so I had to do it first. If I had've allowed him to delete me first, it would have felt like he was kicking me as I lay on the ground. Best decision I ever made Link to post Share on other sites
Author HopeLove Posted August 7, 2010 Author Share Posted August 7, 2010 Since I deleted him from fb I'm not interesed into looking at fb. Funny hen? Link to post Share on other sites
smk Posted August 7, 2010 Share Posted August 7, 2010 I don't have the courage to delete her off my FB but then again I am not a big FB person and rarely use it so not really tempted to look at it... Link to post Share on other sites
Author HopeLove Posted August 7, 2010 Author Share Posted August 7, 2010 Most people here advice to delet their ex from fc. I can't do it since it took me a lot of strengh as in a way a regret a bit doing it. Do it only if you are sure about it. I did it because I prefered to be the one doing it first. Link to post Share on other sites
smk Posted August 7, 2010 Share Posted August 7, 2010 I know she won't delete me - she still wants to be "friends" which I said no to - and she works for a company which I co-own and in a few months we are giving her a percentage of it too... I just don't log onto FB - and TBH I rarely even do updates or pics on it so not too bothered... Link to post Share on other sites
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