nineyearsgone79 Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 Is it odd that my boyfriend wants to take turns on paying for condoms?? He said i bought last time how about u buy this time? He said we could take turns... is that pretty normal nowadays? My ex use to pay for those.
zengirl Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 So long as he pays half your birth control if you go on that option, I'd say it could be fair enough. If you have to actually bring up "Who pays for the condoms?" though, I'm going with: What kind of immature, cheap, petty folks are you? Since I've been a sexually active adult, I've always have condoms at my house just in case (even when I wasn't using them; I figure I'll meet someone to start dating and sleep with eventually, just like I keep Tylenol, etc, around, as basics; or if I was with someone, you never know when you'll go on antibiotics, etc, which makes BC not work). I expect any fellow who has sex or an expectation of sex to have some at his house too. I'm not into condom counting myself, but I'm not too cheap/afraid to buy them. I'd never ask a fellow to pay for 50% of my monthly BC pills though. Bringing this up strikes me as the same sort of pettiness.
Author nineyearsgone79 Posted August 6, 2010 Author Posted August 6, 2010 Well true... but he never treats me for anything in general. Meals, tips, events are always dutch. We have dated 2 months now. I also have to buy the lube and spermacide etc which is even more expensive. He told me I don't need it and it's a useless expense but it hurts without it. I just don't want to be in pain though. He's a taller guy 6'5" and i'm 5'1" and petite. The condoms are much cheaper than those items I pay for.
Author nineyearsgone79 Posted August 6, 2010 Author Posted August 6, 2010 He hasn't offered me 50/50 for birth control.. I am not on it though.
lofi_tokyo Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 If you're sore without lube, I'd hardly call it a useless expense. Anyways. I agree with zengirl... its kind of a weird thing to get into a dispute about. Both of you should, in theory, have condoms at your own places.
Pfiend101 Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 I've payed for everything with every woman I've dated. They all have eventually left me. I'm wondering if this is a downfall of mine after reading all these threads..... Interesting.
Author nineyearsgone79 Posted August 6, 2010 Author Posted August 6, 2010 No Pfiend101 please don't transform into one of these guys!! Seriously... this and other things are leading me to re-think things with him. Girls do not love jerks. There just are more jerk-esque guys out there so that's prolly why your reading stories about them. I wish I could find a guy a bit more old-fashioned in those ways. It's not the fact of the money etc. It's more about what it signifies. To me it says i'm not worth the price of condoms. It just makes me feel cheap and takes away any romantic aspect ya know? When he did buy them he was going on about how he wished the boxes were two for one. Yet he golfs on sundays and spends a fortune. To me I would think having sex was worth the few dollars... but i guess it's not as fun as golf maybe?
that girl Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 but he never treats me for anything in general. Meals, tips, events are always dutch. This is not a great sign. I do think it is reasonable for couples to more or less split costs, but it sounds like he is much more of a stickler than that. I also have to buy the lube and spermacide etc which is even more expensive. He told me I don't need it and it's a useless expense but it hurts without it. I just don't want to be in pain though. He's a taller guy 6'5" and i'm 5'1" and petite. Red flag, big giant waving red flag. This sounds horrible and selfish. Not only is he enough of a jerk to ask you to split condoms when you pay for lube, he doesn't really care about your sexual experience. How old are you two? Is he like the most fabulous guy otherwise because he sounds like a huge dick.
Untouchable_Fire Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 No Pfiend101 please don't transform into one of these guys!! Seriously... this and other things are leading me to re-think things with him. Girls do not love jerks. There just are more jerk-esque guys out there so that's prolly why your reading stories about them. I wish I could find a guy a bit more old-fashioned in those ways. It's not the fact of the money etc. It's more about what it signifies. To me it says i'm not worth the price of condoms. It just makes me feel cheap and takes away any romantic aspect ya know? When he did buy them he was going on about how he wished the boxes were two for one. Yet he golfs on sundays and spends a fortune. To me I would think having sex was worth the few dollars... but i guess it's not as fun as golf maybe? I'm kinda with Pfiend on this one. I've paid for most everything in my previous relationships... and it just leaves me feeling used. Especially since 2 of the last 3 cheated. One of my big resolves from now on is to be very conscious of how much my date spends. I don't understand how this makes you feel cheap anyway? If he was paying for everything... would that make you feel like a prostitute?
Author nineyearsgone79 Posted August 6, 2010 Author Posted August 6, 2010 No.. I wouldn't want him to pay for everything. It's just that when he asks me to pick up condoms on the way over i duno.. it feels really weird. Also as I mentioned earlier the lube and spermacide add up even more and he won't split those. Just to let u know how he thinks I asked him what his ex and him use to do for christmas.. just u know getting gifts whatnot. He goes UGh no we didn't give gifts what's the point. I was a lil surprised.. it was as if i asked him if my face was blue. Me and my ex use to always surprise each other. Sometimes it's nice to do nice things for each other without any reason ya know? I would treat him if he ever treated me .. I'm not an all or none girl. I just wonder why I drive an hour to visit him and then I have to spring for the protection. Btw I drive to him because I have very little privacy where I am at so I have to go over to him.
Ruby Slippers Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 As far as I'm concerned, a guy who's so cheap he won't pay for condoms is unf**kable.
meerkat stew Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 he sounds like a huge dick. ... in more ways than one. OP time to dump and move on, this guy is not going to improve.
Untouchable_Fire Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 Ok, he sounds like a jerk. Why are you with him at all? Why do you let him do that to you. Just say no when he tells you to buy something like that. Or better yet find a better man. Ugh... I don't know why you women always flock to jackwads like that all the time.
somedude81 Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 I'm amazed over the anger on this issue. Seriously what is so wrong about saying, "Hey babe, can you get some condoms on your way over" For your viewing pleasure
that girl Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 I'm amazed over the anger on this issue. Dude, he makes her split everything except lube, which he thinks she should do without.
somedude81 Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 I was only talking about the condoms. Assuming it was a different couple, it should be perfectly fine to ask her get condoms. I'm not even going to get involved in talking about 79 and her BF.
Angel1111 Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 I was only talking about the condoms. Assuming it was a different couple, it should be perfectly fine to ask her get condoms. I'm not even going to get involved in talking about 79 and her BF. In the context of the way you said it, there's nothing wrong with that at all. His behavior is way beyond that though. She needs to lose this guy in a hurry.
jamesum Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 They sell wholesale cheap condoms on the internet. Geez, guys. Anyway, I honestly think you should leave him. He seems to be way too cheap.
meerkat stew Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 I don't want women buying my condoms because they are likely to buy some pastel-colored fruity-smelling ones which would make it hard to keep an erection due to laughing hysterically. J/K but seriously, I have them trying to force enough product on me, hair stuff, face conditioner, eye cream, makeup for men, that I don't want them to have any extra excuses or opportunities to do so while in the drug store. And for goodness sakes, condoms are dirt cheap. Getting them to kick in on gas, -now- we're talkin!
Sanman Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 Having you pick up condoms once in a while on the way over is fine, but this guy sounds ridiculous. I am all for splitting things in a relationship, but this guy is just being petty and ridiculous. Has he shown that he likes you in any way other than being willing to have sex with you after you drive to him and buy the condoms? Please tell me there are at least multiple orgasms involved...that MIGHT explain it.
SpanksTheMonkey Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 Is it odd that my boyfriend wants to take turns on paying for condoms?? He said i bought last time how about u buy this time? He said we could take turns... is that pretty normal nowadays? My ex use to pay for those. Ive always been proactive when it comes to my body and protection I like to buy them myself so I know exactly were they come from how old they are and that they haven't tampered with at all its worth the cost to me if you guys need lube let him buy that..
SpanksTheMonkey Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 No.. I wouldn't want him to pay for everything. It's just that when he asks me to pick up condoms on the way over i duno.. it feels really weird. Also as I mentioned earlier the lube and spermacide add up even more and he won't split those. Just to let u know how he thinks I asked him what his ex and him use to do for christmas.. just u know getting gifts whatnot. He goes UGh no we didn't give gifts what's the point. I was a lil surprised.. it was as if i asked him if my face was blue. Me and my ex use to always surprise each other. Sometimes it's nice to do nice things for each other without any reason ya know? I would treat him if he ever treated me .. I'm not an all or none girl. I just wonder why I drive an hour to visit him and then I have to spring for the protection. Btw I drive to him because I have very little privacy where I am at so I have to go over to him. Oh I just saw this eww hes that cheep? thats something your going to have to decide if you want to deal with or not op I mean my bf is a little "frugal" as well but even he wouldn't be a downer on Xmas! And why doesn't he think you need lube? if you do you do simple as that. Must be him not getting you properly "warmed up" after all so in a way its his error. Why should you suffer in pain? Ide be seriously thinking about things op its not going to get better as he gets older trust me..
meerkat stew Posted August 6, 2010 Posted August 6, 2010 Ive always been proactive when it comes to my body and protection Is that an old lady's vagina in your avatar?
Author nineyearsgone79 Posted August 6, 2010 Author Posted August 6, 2010 Heh I wish I had multiple orgasms from sex. Sadly he isn't a fan of wearing the condoms so he can't maintain the erection for all that long. I've never seen a guy with such issues wearing the condoms. Yeah I've certainly never met a guy in general so frugal. Yet, he's been obsessing about wanting to go on a cruise in november with me to mexico. I don't want to go because I'm not really big into mexico. It's nice but I'd rather save my money and go somewhere I really want to be. However, he's been going on about this since our third date. It's really funny he comes off as laid back but is very stubborn and petulant when he doesn't get his way on things.
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